Friend who breaks commitments

P

Patnono

Member
Location
Whittier,Ca
I have a friend that's much older than me and has driving limitations. So I drive her sometimes to doctors appointments etc. I'm a little frustrated with her right now that she keeps agreeing to meet with mural friends who also have lives too as do i . She keeps cancelling . Relatives who want to visit with her. They don't live out of state so she can visit them another time. Me and the other friends have cleared our schedules for this get-together. Now she wants to meet another day? Tied of her not caring about the fact that we we're making ourselves available. She wanted to see a friend who's having a serious surgery coming beginning of October. Should I keep letting her get away with this? What should I say to her ? Thanks
 

That's not too difficult if I read that right. "I'm sorry. I've already made a commitment for that day. We need to keep the plans that have already been made." Everyone who drives her to and fro needs to stick to that response. No explanation beyond that is necessary.
 
GeorgiaXplant said:
That's not too difficult if I read that right. "I'm sorry. I've already made a commitment for that day. We need to keep the plans that have already been made." Everyone who drives her to and fro needs to stick to that response. No explanation beyond that is necessary.
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Ditto
 

Personally I would just meet up with your other friends as arranged, and catch up with her when it is convenient
 
GeorgiaXplant said:
That's not too difficult if I read that right. "I'm sorry. I've already made a commitment for that day. We need to keep the plans that have already been made." Everyone who drives her to and fro needs to stick to that response. No explanation beyond that is necessary.
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Thanks for your reply, I did tell her that, she said she wasn't going to miss seeing her cousin. Im not going to reschedule this for her convenience. The other woman had scheduled this to see her, I'm kind of angry with her about her inconsideration of others.
 
This is where "Tough Love" comes in. To me, sometimes people can be just too kind and helpful to a friend, especially a friend like this.
 
I kinda feel used by her? She asked me to take her to my mechanic with her car, this took up half my day, after all that, she tells my mechanic she can't leave her car and doesn't have the money??? So I'm like Why? Did she bring it??? I was hurt that she couldn't keep her commitment to our friends. I put aside things I need to do to help her out. Going to keep my distance from her for now.
 
Patnono said:
I kinda feel used by her? She asked me to take her to my mechanic with her car, this took up half my day, after all that, she tells my mechanic she can't leave her car and doesn't have the money??? So I'm like Why? Did she bring it??? I was hurt that she couldn't keep her commitment to our friends. I put aside things I need to do to help her out. Going to keep my distance from her for now.
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Of course you're being used by her, and you allow it over and over. You control the situation and what you do for her. She does seem extremely inconsiderate and has to realize that the world doesn't revolve around her only. Stop feeding into her behavior and your life will be much better for it, in my opinion. Keeping a distance is a good idea.
 
SeaBreeze said:
Of course you're being used by her, and you allow it over and over. You control the situation and what you do for her. She does seem extremely inconsiderate and has to realize that the world doesn't revolve around her only. Stop feeding into her behavior and your life will be much better for it, in my opinion. Keeping a distance is a good idea.
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Great post.

This person is not a friend.
The term 'friend' is so loosely used these days.
I blame facebook for that.
 


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