Getting a little religion

A nun went to pick up medical supplies, but on the way back, her car ran out of gas. Having just passed a gas station, she walked back and asked for two gallons. The attendant said the station had sold its last can, so she would need to find something to put the gas in.

Dejected, the nun started back to her car and when she realized that she had a bedpan among the medical supplies. She took the bedpan to the station and put her gas in it and walked back to her car.

As the nun poured from the bedpan into the tank, two men watching from across the street looked at each other in amazement., before one said, "If that blasted car starts, I'm going to become a Catholic."
 
One bright, beautiful Sunday morning, everyone in tiny Jonestown
wakes up early and goes to their local church. Before the service starts,
the townspeople sit in their pews and talk about their lives and their families.

Suddenly, at the altar, Satan appears!! Everyone starts screaming and running

for the front entrance, trampling each other in their determined efforts to get
away from Evil Incarnate. Soon, everyone is evacuated from the church except
for one man, who sit calmly in his pew, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's
ultimate enemy is in his presence. This confuses Satan a bit. Satan walks up to the
man and says, "Hey, don't you know who I am?" The man says, "Yep, sure do."

Satan says, "Well, aren't you afraid of me?" The man says, "Nope, sure ain't."

Satan, perturbed, says, "And why aren't you afraid of me?"
The man says, "Well, I've been married to your sister for 25 years."
 
One Sunday a 10 year old boy was standing in the church entrance staring at a memorial of fallen veterans from the congregation.

The pastor walked up to the boy and asked "Can I help you son?" The boy asked the pastor "who where these men?"

The pastor plied that "they all died in the service." The boy asked "which one the 8 o'clock or the 10 o'clock?"
 
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