Hello from Delaware

Ditzy Blonde said:
Hi I am Leslie and I am 54 years old from Delaware. I am actually just going to copy and paste what I wrote in my about you section on my profile page since that kind of sums it up.

I was born and raised in the Newark, Delaware area. I suppose you could say I have never left. I met my future husband through a friend of mine who happened to be her older brother. At first while I was only 16 years old and he was 20. My parents were not too thrilled about this.

We stayed together and once he graduated college which was the same time I graduated high school we decided to move into an apartment together. Strike two, as my parents did not like that idea much at all either but I had just turned 18 so I did it anyway. We kept on dating and eventually got engaged and then married when I turned 21.

We lived happily and brought a beautiful daughter into the world who is 24 years old now. 3 years ago however I lost my husband to a sudden heart attack at the age 54. I was 51 at the time. Throughout my life I was only a housewife and a mother. I know how to take care of my husband and daughter and the house.

I never had a job or knew nothing of the finances or bills our future or anything like that. Around the same time I also lost my dad. So it was really hard. In the 3 years I have really struggled trying to understand the financial part of things. I have had to get my first ever job as a maid at a hotel and even though it doesn't sound like much it keeps the roof over my head. My daughter who at this moment still lives at home helps as well. My daughter and my mom have even suggested I start dating again. It has been just over 3 years and they both tell me that I still have a lot to give a man and a lot of life to live. It is something that just every time I think about it I struggle with.
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Hi, welcome to the forum! I am sorry your husband died.

But “only a housewife and mother”, motherhood is one of the hardest jobs in the world! Don’t sell yourself short. I remember all those parent/teacher conferences 🤮. Do I have to go? Yes, mom, my daughter would say, you do. Ugh hated them. Being a housewife is no picnic either.

I didn’t work much over the years, as I choose to foster children. But I worked some. I worked as a maid once as well. I liked it although it was too physically demanding for me. Brush up your typing skills, and 10 key skills, and get a job at a credit card company.

Credit card companies pay really well, they have good bonuses, good medical insurance, don’t care if you are male or female, or old, and promote fairly fast. You don’t need a college degree. If you can stand to do it, collections at a credit card company really pays well. You are in Delaware, I know there are CC companies there.

You will learn how to do the finances, but when the schools open up you can take some adult ed classes if you need to. I just sighed up for on line banking. It was hard cause we/I couldn’t figure out what the account number was till we called. Oh, they said, those numbers are just spare numbers we set there. 🤦🏻‍♀️

After mr I want to balance the checkbooks made several errors, I’ve banned him from balancing mine. Apparently getting old makes you forget how to add and subtract. But I could never spell, and still can’t. He used to be able to spell as well, but now I have Alexa. 😂

Anyway, I am sure you can do it all. And now you have all of the people on here to help. Except me, I know very little, and what I did know I’ve mostly forgotten. I have a daughter around your age, raising her 2 year old granddaughter. She is amazing and I am sure you are amazing. But you are NOT only a “housewife and mother.”
 

@Aneeda72 Thanks so much for those words of wisdom and kind words. I have never been the sharpest tool in the shed when it came to numbers so right there I am at a disadvantage, but I have somehow made it work these past 3 years and I haven't lost the house on bounced any checks yet.

In these times working now as a Maid in a hotel is twice as hard as I suppose it even was before all of this Covid stuff. We women work pretty damn hard each day cleaning these rooms and bathrooms and there are even times when our boss has told us to do t over again. I cannot tell you how exhausted I am after I finish for the day. There are some young girls, but there are some ladies that are even older than myself doing this.

Thank You @Phoenix
 

Hi Leslie, A big welcome from SW Pa. So glad to have you here. So sorry you had to suffer such loss at your age. I am 81 & have 2 daughters slightly older than you.
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Ditzy Blonde said:
@Aneeda72 Thanks so much for those words of wisdom and kind words. I have never been the sharpest tool in the shed when it came to numbers so right there I am at a disadvantage, but I have somehow made it work these past 3 years and I haven't lost the house on bounced any checks yet.

In these times working now as a Maid in a hotel is twice as hard as I suppose it even was before all of this Covid stuff. We women work pretty damn hard each day cleaning these rooms and bathrooms and there are even times when our boss has told us to do t over again. I cannot tell you how exhausted I am after I finish for the day. There are some young girls, but there are some ladies that are even older than myself doing this.

Thank You @Phoenix
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It is a really hard job! I mean seriously, vacuuming in one direction, who cares about that? I hate having to back out the door while vacuuming. Seriously, become a telemarketer as soon as you can. It’s a great job and much more money. If I could do it in my 60’s, you can do it now.
 
Ditzy Blonde said:
@Aneeda72 Thanks so much for those words of wisdom and kind words. I have never been the sharpest tool in the shed when it came to numbers so right there I am at a disadvantage, but I have somehow made it work these past 3 years and I haven't lost the house on bounced any checks yet.

In these times working now as a Maid in a hotel is twice as hard as I suppose it even was before all of this Covid stuff. We women work pretty damn hard each day cleaning these rooms and bathrooms and there are even times when our boss has told us to do t over again. I cannot tell you how exhausted I am after I finish for the day. There are some young girls, but there are some ladies that are even older than myself doing this.

Thank You @Phoenix
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Hang in. You will get passed this.

Does the disinfectant make you ditsy? I would think breathing it in all day long would be hard on you.
 
XO.gif @Ditzy Blonde So very sorry for your tremendous loss. Can only imagine what you and your daughter must be going through. Happy you found SF. Lots of sharing, caring and support here. Don't be afraid to lean on a shoulder.....that's what we do here. ENJOY your time here. TAKE CARE.
 
Hello1.gif and welcome, Leslie. I am a recent widow of just 4 months. I'm not really interested in dating, at this point, and don't really think that's what I want in the future, either. I am mostly interested in making friends. People I can meet for breakfast or lunch or a movie. But, of course, I know that my feelings on this could change. So, I'll just say that unless I happen to trip over someone I could love, and who could love me, I'm not looking. 😁
 

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