Hi, from rural New York State.

moviequeen1

Well-known Member
Location
Buffalo,NY
HI Martha,welcome glad you found us
You'll meet wonderful group members from around the world which makes SF an unique forum
Where in rural NYS are you?
Enjoy yourself here
Sue born/raised/still living in hometown,Buffalo,NY
 

Martha Ferris

New Member
Location
NYS
HI Martha,welcome glad you found us
You'll meet wonderful group members from around the world which makes SF an unique forum
Where in rural NYS are you?
Enjoy yourself here
Sue born/raised/still living in hometown,Buffalo,NY
I currently live in outside of Wayland, NY. Thank you for the welcome.
 

Paco Dennis

Member
Location
Mid-Missouri
Hi Martha,
I joined about 2 weeks ago. This is a terrific community, expressing our "later life" years experience. There is a very wide range of subjects that a lot of folk are interested in.
I was born and raised in San Jose, Ca.. I have lived in Mid-Missouri for about 45 years. We live on an old farm located near the Missouri River, it is about 75% forest. We have 2 cats and a dog, 2 goats, and six chickens. The farm has got old as we have...once thriving, it has slowed down considerably. :)

WELCOME!

 

AnnieA

Senior Member
Location
Down South
I am looking forward to getting to know the members here and hopefully have some great conversations.

The best way to have great conversations is to keep threads from getting closed by observing the no politics rules of the forum. When a forum has such a rule and you violate it, it's akin to farting during someone's formal dinner party. But the concern is deeper than stirring up forum bickering: we're being herded towards polarized divisiveness on nearly every front. The steering is deliberate and the more we question it, resist it and refrain from 'othering' people from either point of polarization, the better the forum and the world will work.
 

Martha Ferris

New Member
Location
NYS
The best way to have great conversations is to keep threads from getting closed by observing the no politics rules of the forum. When a forum has such a rule and you violate it, it's akin to farting during someone's formal dinner party. But the concern is deeper than stirring up forum bickering: we're being herded towards polarized divisiveness on nearly every front. The steering is deliberate and the more we question it, resist it and refrain from 'othering' people from either point of polarization, the better the forum and the world will work.
I agree that we are being driven to be polarized. It was not my intent to stir up bickering. If the post had merely said "has everyone gone crazy?" without mentioning the womans response to seeing the flag flying then there would not have been any controversy but it was a post/comment about a comment about the flag and that set the stage. The flag has become politicised.

My response to the post about the flag was about how I feel when I see it now and that maybe others feel the same way. Maybe the woman mentioned in the post does too. It was about reasons not about politics.

January 6th left an indelible impression on many of us and one that is linked to Americans claiming to be patriots assaulting Congress and our very democracy while carrying the American flag in an effort to stop the lawful verification of the electoral votes. A betrayal of everything the flag stands for. Unfortunately the flag has become politicized by actions such as these and when I see the flag flying especially by individuals in my community my mind goes back to that day and the horror that I felt and the fear that our Democracy was falling. Images become linked to strong emotional reactions. The flag, the flag of all Americans, has become stained.

Liberal and conservative are not political per say but the way the brain is constructed. See my reference to support this claim.

If you knew me you would know that there is no "other" for me regarding humans. We are all, every single one of us on this planet, one race one species no exception. There is no us and them there is only us but that does not mean that I will give everyone a pass on what they say and how they behave. These are two different issues.

When someone thinks that having a view point that you don't understand is crazy without even finding out why that perspective exists is disappointing at the very least. Shall I just accept everything that someone says without question or dissent? Silence implies agreement. Shall I have only superfical conversations with others? Are only certain viewpoints allowed on this site? As I said in my replies there are reasons for everything we do and say thus my response to the initial post. Is it wrong to consider why what was said, that was thought to be crazy, was said. Is it wrong to try to understand the thinking of others? Only by interacting with each other and sharing different perspectives and respectfully considering those perspectives can we hope to find a middle ground of understanding.

Tolerance does not mean turning a blind eye. Tolerance does not mean we don't question. Tolerance comes from the knowledge and understanding of ourselves and others. What you suggest is merely a bandaid fix to the divisions in our society. If I don't see and I don't hear then everything will be fine and there will be peace. If only it were true.

There are more and more people in our world every day and thus the world is getting smaller. We can no longer indulge in our tribalism but must come together as the one race that we are if we are to continue to survive and that requires respectful communication with the goal of understanding other people especially those who seem so different from us.
 

AnnieA

Senior Member
Location
Down South
I agree that we are being driven to be polarized. It was not my intent to stir up bickering. If the post had merely said "has everyone gone crazy?" without mentioning the womans response to seeing the flag flying then there would not have been any controversy but it was a post/comment about a comment about the flag and that set the stage. The flag has become politicised.

My response to the post about the flag was about how I feel when I see it now and that maybe others feel the same way. Maybe the woman mentioned in the post does too. It was about reasons not about politics.

January 6th left an indelible impression on many of us and one that is linked to Americans claiming to be patriots assaulting Congress and our very democracy while carrying the American flag in an effort to stop the lawful verification of the electoral votes. A betrayal of everything the flag stands for. Unfortunately the flag has become politicized by actions such as these and when I see the flag flying especially by individuals in my community my mind goes back to that day and the horror that I felt and the fear that our Democracy was falling. Images become linked to strong emotional reactions. The flag, the flag of all Americans, has become stained.

The point I was trying to make is that this is a no politics board. If you felt the American flag thread offensive, reporting rather than responding in violation of the rules would've better fit the host's wishes. Regardless of how you feel and why, this board paid for and hosted by an individual who set a no politics rule. By explaining yourself, you continue to violate that.

As for a stained flag ...it always has been. It stands for a nation made up of fallible people who've made horrific choices throughout its history and will most certainly continue to do so. But it also stands for a structure in which positive changes have and still are being made.


Liberal and conservative are not political per say but the way the brain is constructed. See my reference to support this claim.

I don't see your reference but superficially that sounds intellectually lazy. Sounds as though it doesn't acknowledge real life patterns of people who have made pendulum swing changes from one ideology to another. It also marginalizes those of us who try to fight polarization within ourselves and in our interactions with others. I'll gladly read your link if you care to provide it, but I will read with the mindset that the sociobehavioral fields are very fluid and it's therefore easy to manipulate social research in order to show a preconceived result. It's also easy for subconscious bias to impact research.

When someone thinks that having a view point that you don't understand is crazy without even finding out why that perspective exists is disappointing at the very least. Shall I just accept everything that someone says without question or dissent? Silence implies agreement. Shall I have only superfical conversations with others? Are only certain viewpoints allowed on this site? As I said in my replies there are reasons for everything we do and say thus my response to the initial post. Is it wrong to consider why what was said, that was thought to be crazy, was said. Is it wrong to try to understand the thinking of others? Only by interacting with each other and sharing different perspectives and respectfully considering those perspectives can we hope to find a middle ground of understanding.

Again. Report it if tempts you to cross the line as you did in that thread and in your defense of your behavior in this one. To do otherwise in a forum with a no politics rule is as self-indulgent as a person who lights up in the home of people who maintain a smoke free home environment.
 
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When someone thinks that having a view point that you don't understand is crazy without even finding out why that perspective exists is disappointing at the very least.
When people can't even agree on what constitutes objective reality, there is no chance for a civil discussion, but that's where our country is right now and why political discussions should not be allowed in this forum. There are plenty of other forums for that kind of thing.
 
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Martha Ferris

New Member
Location
NYS
The point I was trying to make is that this is a no politics board. If you felt the American flag thread offensive, reporting rather than responding in violation of the rules would've better fit the host's wishes. Regardless of how you feel and why, this board paid for and hosted by an individual who set a no politics rule. By explaining yourself, you continue to violate that.

As for a stained flag ...it always has been. It stands for a nation made up of fallible people who've made horrific choices throughout its history and will most certainly continue to do so. But it also stands for a structure in which positive changes have and still are being made.




I don't see your reference but superficially that sounds intellectually lazy. Sounds as though it doesn't acknowledge real life patterns of people who have made pendulum swing changes from one ideology to another. It also marginalizes those of us who try to fight polarization within ourselves and in our interactions with others. I'll gladly read your link if you care to provide it, but I will read with the mindset that the sociobehavioral fields are very fluid and it's therefore easy to manipulate social research in order to show a preconceived result. It's also easy for subconscious bias to impact research.



Again. Report it if tempts you to cross the line as you did in that thread and in your defense of your behavior in this one. To do otherwise in a forum with a no politics rule is as self-indulgent as a person who lights up in the home of people who maintain a smoke free home environment.
I did provide the link in my responses in the original post but here it is again: Conservative and Liberal Brains Might Have Some Real Differences - Scientific American I find it interesting that without even reading the article you have formulated an opinion about it.

I have considered your statements and reviewed my actions. I have thought about how I could have responded differently or if I needed to respond at all to the original post. I am not making excuses for my comments, but again, was explaining why in all fo them. You seemed to have missed that intent.

I don't know how to explain my position any better than I have. Perhaps I should have approached the comment in a different way. Perhaps I should not expect people to consider why they said what they said or feel what they feel. "Why" is often too deep a question to pose.

What confuses me is that what happened on January 6 was a fact. It is not an opinion. It's like saying it rained here today. Fact. Yes, Jan. 6th involved politics but it is also now a part of our American history and experience. The impact it had on me is a fact. There are no right or wrong feelings. They just are. Not recognizing that people have feelings about incidents in their lives is disrepsectful and invalidates the individual. It minimalizes them and their lives. Devisiveness.

Perhaps I should have asked the person who posted why he thought that what he was commenting on was objectionable instead. Hmmm. I wonder if the original comment has had negative repercussions from you.

This has been a learning experience for me. Rather than self indulgent as you seem to imply I am analytical but most people I have encountered are not. They just want what is on the surface and are not interested in delving deeper. Not much chance of conversations there. Yet another reason for our divisiveness.

I prefer to have discussions rather than reporting people. As I said conversations can lead to the understanding of different perspectives but that takes openmindedness, a willingness to see anothers point of view, by the parties involved. A willingness not to make assumptions. A willingness to listen to ALL that is being said.

I don't expect you to agree with my position but to give it thoughtful consideration. You seem to read to respond not to consider what has been said as your responses to my posts, this and others, indicate. This is a common with people and listening which adds to the problem of the devisiveness in our society as well.

I will be leaving this forum. Best wishes to all.
 

AnnieA

Senior Member
Location
Down South
I did provide the link in my responses in the original post but here it is again: Conservative and Liberal Brains Might Have Some Real Differences - Scientific American I find it interesting that without even reading the article you have formulated an opinion about it.

I have considered your statements and reviewed my actions. I have thought about how I could have responded differently or if I needed to respond at all to the original post. I am not making excuses for my comments, but again, was explaining why in all fo them. You seemed to have missed that intent.

I don't know how to explain my position any better than I have. Perhaps I should have approached the comment in a different way. Perhaps I should not expect people to consider why they said what they said or feel what they feel. "Why" is often too deep a question to pose.

What confuses me is that what happened on January 6 was a fact. It is not an opinion. It's like saying it rained here today. Fact. Yes, Jan. 6th involved politics but it is also now a part of our American history and experience. The impact it had on me is a fact. There are no right or wrong feelings. They just are. Not recognizing that people have feelings about incidents in their lives is disrepsectful and invalidates the individual. It minimalizes them and their lives. Devisiveness.

Perhaps I should have asked the person who posted why he thought that what he was commenting on was objectionable instead. Hmmm. I wonder if the original comment has had negative repercussions from you.

This has been a learning experience for me. Rather than self indulgent as you seem to imply I am analytical but most people I have encountered are not. They just want what is on the surface and are not interested in delving deeper. Not much chance of conversations there. Yet another reason for our divisiveness.

I prefer to have discussions rather than reporting people. As I said conversations can lead to the understanding of different perspectives but that takes openmindedness, a willingness to see anothers point of view, by the parties involved. A willingness not to make assumptions. A willingness to listen to ALL that is being said.

I don't expect you to agree with my position but to give it thoughtful consideration. You seem to read to respond not to consider what has been said as your responses to my posts, this and others, indicate. This is a common with people and listening which adds to the problem of the devisiveness in our society as well.

I will be leaving this forum. Best wishes to all.

Instead of leaving, you could stay and realize that the forum owner doesn't want political discussion and most members are okay with that. Some of us even very grateful for the respite since politics can be found elsewhere ad nauseam This forum has plenty else to offer outside politics. But there are others who have left over the same frustration and I've noticed that it tends to be the more extreme of the polarized sides. It's sad when politics are so important to a person that they're dismissive of others' wishes. I've often wondered if the people who try to impose their will and then leave because they can't respect the terms of a private venue act that way in real life. Again, there's the similar comparison of a non-smoking environment. If you were a smoker would you light up anyway or whine out loud that you're invalidated and minimized because you couldn't to people you just met? Would you condone the behavior of another person who did light up and then complain openly about it to a diverse group of people they were hoping to establish social connections with?

Edit to ask: Could you sustain different circles of friends in real life that have unspoken parameters you honor? I think most people do and realize that where one group might like to talk politics, another might not. Would you force a political topic on the second group over dinner?
 
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HoneyNut

Member
I am trying to expand my social connections. Soon to be 65. Backgound is in health care which abruptly ended seven years ago. I am a human, animal and environmental rights activist. I have a one acre piece of land that I have developed into a certified wildlife habitat. I have four special needs rescue animals that I care for as well as keeping 2 miles of highway around my home clear of trash. I have spent my life trying to make a difference.

Welcome Martha! I hope you stay! That is so cool about your little wildlife habitat.
I turned 65 this year and like the 'social connections' aspect of these boards. I have several acres that I have been letting go wild but unfortunately the constant stream of stray cats limits the success of the wildlife.
 


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