I think about church, religion and my parents

Mr. Ed

Mr. Ed

Be what you is not what you what you ain’t
Location
Central NY
Correct me if I am wrong, but do you recall when parents shoved their children into religion / religious teachings to gain moral character and a sense of right and wrong based on the Biblical instructions for living? As a PK, my mother left disciplinary action to my father who wished he hadn’t come home. There are so many things growing up I could not comprehend because of my dad’s profession we were isolated the public and other families to compare with, so obviously my brothers and I could see no wrongdoing as far the church and my parents parental skills.
My mother avoided all conflicts while my dad’s understanding of discipline gave him permission to make outlandish long-term punishments that soon were forgotten by him and us kids. No respect here.

I am reminded of Aunt Polly in Mark Twain’s novel Tom Sawyer who sent Tom and his friend Huckleberry Fenn to church to learn how to be respectable gentlemen. Unfortunately, Aunt Polly, and many other religious folks were / are mistaken to believe church is the answer. Rather, if parents took their role seriously raising children rather than passing the buck to outside sources, there would be less confusion, greater consistency and family / individual accountability.

As a kid, I could not see the signs, but I felt the pain.
 

My Mom was a true Baptist from Tennessee. She made us go to church on Suday morning. My Dad didn't go. "That stuff ain't for me", he would say. When I was about nine years old, I said I wanted to stay home with Dad. They argued a bit, and then she agreed with him and let me make my choice. I stayed home.
 
My parents never bothered me with the religious aspect of being Jewish. They would just say "We Know Who We Are" and that was basically it. My grandma was Orthodox, but she minded her own business. One day we saw her coming down our street and we had just eaten bacon. So funny, we opened all the windows waving our arms to get the smell out. It took Grandma only 3 minutes to come upstairs. She Had to have smelled it, but she had a MYOB philosophy. She would take me to movies like "The 10 Commandments" and buy us Jewish stuff. On the major holidays, we would visit her at Temple, where she would be all day.

In the third grade my best friend told me there was no god. I was shocked! Didn't know you were "allowed" to think that, but it opened a whole new world and my parents didn't care when I told them, at around age 8 that I was an atheist. I think they all were too, my sister included, but we didn't talk about it.

Compared to you, I was lucky, Mr. Ed.
 

My parents were very involved with our church (a very middle-of-the-road church, nothing extreme). My dad was on the Board of Elders, Mom directed the children's choir, taught Sunday School and both were involved in the youth programs.

I grew up involved....it never occurred to me that people didn't go to church a lot. A lot of my social life revolved around the youth groups as we had a lot of activities and most of my friends attended our church.

I fell away from church attendance when I went away to college and never took it up again, only occasional attendance for holidays, etc.

My parents continued to be active in various churches until their deaths.
 
My dad didn't go to church as an adult nor did one of his brothers. The rest all were devoted to the church. 2 of his brothers were successful through hard work. Only one brother, the youngest is still alive and hes an evil black hearted monster whos nothing but a wolf in sheeps clothing. Hes the executor of a successful brothers estate of which i am a beneficiary. He got the estate involved in multiple lawsuits regarding a farm sale.
 
There is a substantial amount of money missing from the estate and he refuses to answer questions about it. One of his sons is co executor and is the estate accountant whos been ripping the estate in ridiculous fees. Hes now got the estate involved in an audit with the taxation department. He bills ridiculous fees as an accountant and then bills the estate from his wifes book keeping business. Another son stole my uncles house as he offered to buy it rent to own and never paid him. He even kicked him out of the basement so my uncle was living in a motorhome in his shop. These people are Christians in there heads but not in their hearts. Evil lives in those who profess to be doing Gods work.
 
My dad left home and went to work on road construction. He eventually became a heavy duty mechanic of which he was very renowned. Instead of futhering his own education as he was very smart A+ student, he sent money home to mke sure his many brothers and sisters had everything they needed as my grandfather didnt earn much as a minister. My dad was selfless his whole life even to the end. If not for his selflessness i wouldnt have got a penny in inheritance.
 
My dad was religious, mom less so. I was sent to parochial school against my will when I was 5/6 years old. I hated it immediately and pleaded to be allowed by into public school where I had a lot of friends and had been happy. My parents absolutely refused insisting the quality of education was superior in parochial schools. I developed chronic illnesses in childhood and was absent a lot from school which I enjoyed.

This taught me a bad life lesson. Sickness excuses you from doing what you don't want to do in the first place. It took me years to identify this and correct it. One day I will sue the Roman Catholic church for how they frightened us kids. :mad:
 
My mother took my brothers & me to a Methodist Church, my father stayed home. Never questioned why still & don't know. My mother would be upstairs listening to the sermon & singing when the congregation sang. We were in the basement for bible study. Dutifully paying attention to bible stories. Those stories & the fear generated that I could be sent to hell was real. Church & fear was pretty much it until I joined the Navy.

Once away from what I knew & talking to others that didn't have faith or fear of being sent to hell I began questioning what I was taught. The answers were vague, I understand why vague is always going to be the answer. It's not possible other than blind faith to prove leaving a human body, remain sentient to travel to the edge of the observable universe that is about 46.5 billion light-years in any direction to join other sentient non life forms.


Faith or no faith it's a choice. IMO neither is wrong.
 
Funny story about my late 70s friend who a staunch catholic who attends church weekly.
He has a hobby farm and one day was trying to attach a mower deck with a PTO shaft to his tractor. It can be a difficult job as the shaft is very heavy and awkward to connect and get lined up. It often and bringnout the worst in even good men and i heard him cursing loudly as it was not going good for him that day.
I sneek up to the other side of the machine and hide behind the tire. In a loud booming voice i said
"John this is God and i want you to stop swearing"
I ran away lmao while he was scared to death
 
Since mom's side of the family is Jewish and dad's side is Catholic, and I grew up in a multi-generational household, we never discussed religion openly.

I occasionally went to synagogue with my mom, and my paternal grandma occasionally took me to church with her; mainly on Catholic holidays, and they didn't argue with each other about that at all.

I'm sure everyone knew that discussing religion at home could cause a serious rift and alienation. So no one did....I supposed because they all loved us kids.
 
My parents weren’t the least bit religious but we were classified as Anglican when we were born since it was in England. When we moved to Canada they shoved us off to a huge tabernacle church that offered bus serviced Sunday School. This way we were gone for 1/2 a Sunday.

When summer came we were enrolled in summer camp for 1/2 the summer. There were even camp overs which I hated. The guys always came into our tent to flirt with the attractive girls. When I left home at 16, I stopped going to church and got into the wrong crowd.

I didn’t have any aunts or uncles and my one living grandmother was the only grandparent I ever met and it was only for 2 weeks.


Organized Religion wasn’t a practiced discipline in my family. When my brother died in 1979, my mom condemned God for taking her favourite son away. We weren't allowed to mourn him in front of her. I was glad to have my own apartment during all of that.
 
My parents blindly accepted every word of their Presbyterian upbringing. They were totally unable to discuss or justify their beliefs , they just forced me off to Sunday school and bible class where I would argue with the teachers. I was young when I rejected religion and became what is now popularly called 'Secular Humanist'.

My sister is heavily involved with the Baptist church, but I don't believe in god .
 
Murrmurr said:
Since mom's side of the family is Jewish and dad's side is Catholic, and I grew up in a multi-generational household, we never discussed religion openly.

I occasionally went to synagogue with my mom, and my paternal grandma occasionally took me to church with her; mainly on Catholic holidays, and they didn't argue with each other about that at all.

I'm sure everyone knew that discussing religion at home could cause a serious rift and alienation. So no one did....I supposed because they all loved us kids.
Click to expand...
That was much the same in my family. Dad was of Jewish heritage, but pretty much agnostic. Mother was raised a Roman Catholic but was what today is known as, lapsed. My Dad was captivated by my mother and if that meant Catholicism, so be it. My religious upbringing meant that I attended a school run by an order of priests known as The Vincentian Fathers. That is, priests of The Society of St. Vincent DePaul. Those priests taught me that God is love, and just to make sure that I, and my fellow students, got the message, it was delivered by courtesy of a one and a quarter thick, heavy leather strap. A device used, with what felt like, relish, on small boys.

You could be forgiven for believing that as soon as I had left school I would have nothing to do with God, church and the catholic faith. Let's just say, I do God, but in my way. I have to believe in a deity simply by science.

We were taught that God has no beginning nor no end. Not an easy concept to get your head around. But, if our universe is finite, what's at the end of it? Thinking about it, our universe has to be infinite, even so, still difficult to grasp!
 
I center on my Grampa O' when thinking of my folks and religion or church

He didn't attend church
Mainly due to his concern of disturbing other folks due to his Parkinson's (shaking)

But, he was devout
One time I peered through a cracked door to his study.
He was on his hands and knees, talking to his Lord, no longer able to just kneel.

His prayers were for family, their salvation

They are being answered.....in spite of myself


His bible was quite worn.

I have it now
 
My parents were what I’ve heard one minister term “C & E’s;” in church (usually) for Xmas and Easter, and rarely at any other time. Once my mother did go to church when not either of those two times. Upon leaving, the minister told my mother that it was good to see her again. My mother was much offended by this remark, and told the minister that there were “better Christians at home than in church!”

I think this was how the Crusades got started… 🤔

IMG_0174.jpeg
 
I grew up in a family that attended the African Methodist Episcopalian (AME) churches (we are considered Methodists). In fact the congregation in one of them was about 30% my relatives. I changed to that church when I was about 15. My parents stayed at their church where as a child, I had to go to Sunday school every Sunday before church services started. If you know anything about Black churches, you know the services can be quite long. So for a child...it was a long day.

I sang in the youth choirs at both churches. As I grew into adulthood, I started becoming disenchanted with the "sermons", so as an adult, didn't attend regularly, though I enjoyed going to support their programs, such as concerts and breakfasts. I even played for the choir for a short time when I was in my 20's. However, I hated playing in public, especially going to other churches where their sound systems may have been sub par.

But, as choir director and organist, I brought my choir from the abysmal to sounding very good. In fact, one Easter Sunday, when the church was packed, we had the normally staid congregation on it's feet and we were rockin' ! Although I accepted Islam in my late 40s, most of my family members are still devout Christians. They have no problems with me being Muslim nor I with them being Christians. BTW Muslims acknowledge all of the Holy books and I've heard several Muslim ministers teach not only from the Holy Quran, but also from the Bible.
 
My history might have been different if my dad included me into his life. He literally never talked to me unless his objective was to punish me. This is the preacher-man sent by supernatural forces to save the lost and become fisher’s of men. Ironically given my father’s chozen profession as a man of god, not a single time did he talk to me about god, Jesus or salvation.

Recently, I thought about faith and how one must have faith to believe in god, Jesus and the Bible. Faith seems similar to using one’s imagination to make certain religious beliefs true. However, there is no proof that imagination or faith that justifies religious beliefs as real or truth. But people believe the way they were taught without question.

Why haven’t there been any new revelations of god and god’s word? The same old message comes from the tired old sources making the good news, stale news with a moldy crust. The Bible warned and threatened believers and readers alike to obey the word and obey god regardless of the consequences. Once you join you are required to serve and obey my will. If armageddon happens the god and ungodly will be at war with each other for a 1000 years. That’s scary, the promise of a supernatural war and then the lake of fire.

Lot’s of information don’t line up and perhaps no one will know everything, regardless question, question, question.
 
Mr. Ed said:
Recently, I thought about faith and how one must have faith to believe in god, Jesus and the Bible. Faith seems similar to using one’s imagination to make certain religious beliefs true. However, there is no proof that imagination or faith that justifies religious beliefs as real or truth. But people believe the way they were taught without question.


Lot’s of information don’t line up and perhaps no one will know everything, regardless question, question, question.
Click to expand...
Faith & the stronger blind faith probably comfort, questioning can be uncomfortable. Bible stories IMO are a primitive attempt to understand the unknown.

For instance the bible says "Made In Our Image" Questioning what exactly that image is this is an attempt to answer.

The term has its roots in Genesis 1:27, wherein "God created man in his own image. . ." This scriptural passage does not mean that God is in human form, but rather, that humans are in the image of God in their moral, spiritual, and intellectual nature.
Glossary Definition: Imago Dei ("image of God").

That interpretation leads to more questions like why no reference to "our".

Free will doesn't explain the disparity in intellectual nature. Why would an omnipotent maker punish a portion of his creation?
 
chic said:
This taught me a bad life lesson. Sickness excuses you from doing what you don't want to do in the first place. It took me years to identify this and correct it. One day I will sue the Roman Catholic church for how they frightened us kids. :mad:
Click to expand...
Chic, I hope that you'll do it. The Roman Catholic church has destroyed so many young souls.
 
Religion makes me so comfortless nowadays I hate even discussing it. That's such a change from just a few short years ago which proves, to me, at least, that people can be broken. And whoever created all this, if anyone did, is either impotent to help or does not wish to which are both appalling when you consider it. It's become easier to believe in nothing. :oops:
 

You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top