It Is What It Is

fureverywhere

fureverywhere

beloved friend who will always be with us in spiri
Location
Northern NJ, USA
Gawd, I hate that slogan. So vapid...when people use it to say "Hey that's what it is and I don't give a rat's butt to change it". But guess it suits some moments. My girl is on the autism spectrum. Next year she'll be in high school. Hoooly crap, well at least it's an enclosed class so she'll be protected a bit. But what really bothered me was last night she showed me the graduation trip they're going on.

Washington DC, very cool and perhaps even a tour of the White House plus a bunch of museums. Overnight but I think she's ready. Her old teacher will be back from maternity leave and she's been with these kids three years so she'll be fine. I should call Callie a service dog and send him too...wouldn't THAT be exciting?
But one of the museums is the Holocaust Museum.

I've been there and recommend anyone of any faith to see it at least once, it's that incredibly moving and well done. But talking to my girl, " I know you'll have a good time with your friends, when I was a kid I went to the White House and our college class went to the Holocaust Museum, did you talk about it in class?". She has no idea of the Holocaust...or the World Wars...or even the presidents except Obama is in office right now. And she probably never will. Wow in a way she's freer than us ya know?

Imagine if there was no history to worry about, you didn't go beyond just for today and things that stand out for you, your Halloween costume three years ago, are what you think about. I don't know how to explain my feelings. It's hard I mean I had three kids in excelled classes because they were so bright. You might know I read a bit. Okay there's a plus...she reads very well. But unless it's Austin Mahon's favorite pet she doesn't retain it. Sigh...it is what it is. I guess the secret is celebrating what she can do, not getting bummed about what she can't. It's hard sometimes.
 

It sounds to me like she's a smart young lady and doing very well, she's lucky to have such a loving mom looking out for her. It would be great if she could visit the White House and check out some museums. If Callie could go it would be perfect. :) It's true she's freer than some of us, not having to look back at all the ugly stuff that's happened over time. Cherish her strengths, it will do you both good. :love_heart:
 
Thank you, I needed that. Plus hey there are always parents who have it worse. She's healthy as the dickens, happy, enthusiastic about everything she does. There's a fellow who owns the local book shop. His son is maybe in his early twenties. No speech and prone to flapping his arms. I mean in comparison we're okay ya know?
 

I know what you mean Fur, when you're feeling down, just take a look at the 'big picture' and what some others are dealing with, gotta be grateful for what you've got sometimes...hugs.
 
SeaBreeze said:
I know what you mean Fur, when you're feeling down, just take a look at the 'big picture' and what some others are dealing with, gotta be grateful for what you've got sometimes...hugs.
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That's one of the things I enjoy so much about SeniorForums - when I think I have it bad I come here and see that I'm just squealing like a spoiled little girl.
 
fureverywhere said:
There, there Philly, we all think you are very pretty!
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Do you? REALLY?!?

WHHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

I'm trying to remember when we took our 6th grade trip to D.C. One of the biggest thrills for us was staying overnight.

I also remember being awed by the Smithsonian Museum. Even back then I wasn't impressed with the White House, Capital Building ... even Abe Lincoln left me kind of blase. Never liked politics or politicians.
 
Fureverywhere - I was a behavioral clinician at a large residential facility for adults with autism and Downs Syndrome. It was my job to design training programs; skills of daily living, such as how to use a payphone, how to call a taxi or use a public bus, how to cook simple meals, etc. Of all the dozens of life skills, the hardest for my clients to grasp was that there are people in this world who victimize others. Some accepted it, and obsessed about it (as we expected they would, but there was a program for that). But most of them simply could not comprehend that a human being would have the capacity to be cruel to other humans. Too far removed from the world they occupy, it seemed (which, in a way, also protects them). I will be interested to know how your daughter processes her tour of the Holocaust Museum.
 
Yes that might be interesting...I mean we watch "Pitbull's and Parolee's" and she understands the dog is the victim. The idea that there was a bad guy named Hitler who thought her Jewish friends were bad, he also thought gay people like a favorite uncle and his partner...to the ovens.
 
Fur I can't speak for your daughter but my son who is Autistic has a way of dealing with unpleasant things by ignoring them. If he is confronted with something that is upsetting he is likely to start singing or repeating something he's heard on the radio etc
 
fureverywhere said:
Gawd, I hate that slogan. So vapid...when people use it to say "Hey that's what it is and I don't give a rat's butt to change it". But guess it suits some moments. My girl is on the autism spectrum. Next year she'll be in high school. Hoooly crap, well at least it's an enclosed class so she'll be protected a bit. But what really bothered me was last night she showed me the graduation trip they're going on.

Washington DC, very cool and perhaps even a tour of the White House plus a bunch of museums. Overnight but I think she's ready. Her old teacher will be back from maternity leave and she's been with these kids three years so she'll be fine. I should call Callie a service dog and send him too...wouldn't THAT be exciting?
But one of the museums is the Holocaust Museum.

I've been there and recommend anyone of any faith to see it at least once, it's that incredibly moving and well done. But talking to my girl, " I know you'll have a good time with your friends, when I was a kid I went to the White House and our college class went to the Holocaust Museum, did you talk about it in class?". She has no idea of the Holocaust...or the World Wars...or even the presidents except Obama is in office right now. And she probably never will. Wow in a way she's freer than us ya know?

Imagine if there was no history to worry about, you didn't go beyond just for today and things that stand out for you, your Halloween costume three years ago, are what you think about. I don't know how to explain my feelings. It's hard I mean I had three kids in excelled classes because they were so bright. You might know I read a bit. Okay there's a plus...she reads very well. But unless it's Austin Mahon's favorite pet she doesn't retain it. Sigh...it is what it is. I guess the secret is celebrating what she can do, not getting bummed about what she can't. It's hard sometimes.
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Fur, I used to say "it is what it is" to my son when he was obsessing (esp. in teenage years and early adulthood) about stuff he could not change or about the "why" of things (like why is this happening to me -- things with no answer, things you just must accept). He told me later it helped bring him back to the reality that some things just ARE, whether you like it or not, and it helped him. I now hear him say it to his own teenagers. I still say it to myself sometimes when I get all wound up.

Sounds like you area doing a wonderful job with your daughter, and I'm sure it must be very hard sometimes. I think you're right about in a way she is freer than we are.

If you are seriously concerned about her, could you consider going along as a chaperone? Many school trips (at least when my kids were in school) used to recruit parents to come along and assist with the kids.
 

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