Just senior humor

How may I help you ?"
I want to talk to my Lawyer."
"I’m sorry, but he died last week."
Well; he phones up again and asks the same question.
"I want to talk with my Lawyer!"
"I told you yesterday, he died last week."
So; The next calls again and asks, "I wanna talk with my Lawyer."
"I keep telling you, your lawyer died last week."
I just love hearing it."
 

iu
 
Yesterday was a Grey and dreary.
Today has been a Grey and Dreary day.
Tomorrow, the day after and the next are forecast grey and dreary.



So, what are you getting at?
 
Two old guys, one 82 and one 85, were sitting on a park bench one morning.
The 85-year-old had just finished his morning jog and wasn't even short of breath.
The 82-year-old was amazed at the guy's stamina and asked him what he did to have so much energy.

The 85-year-old said, "Well, I eat rye bread every day.
It keeps your energy level high and you'll have great stamina with the ladies.”

So, on the way home the 82-year-old stopped at the bakery.
As he was looking around, the saleslady asked if he needed any help.
He said, "Do you have any rye bread?”
She said, "Yes, there's a whole shelf of it. Would you like some?”

He said, "I want five loaves.”
She said, "My goodness, five loaves! By the time you get to the 3rd loaf, it'll be hard.”

The old man says to himself,
‘I can't believe everybody knows about this shit but me.’
 
Our neighbor is working in his yard when he is startled by a late model car crashing through the hedge
ending in his front lawn.

He rushes to help an elderly lady out of the car and sits her down in a lawn chair.
He's very excited and says, "you appear quite elderly to be driving".

"Well, yes, I am," she replies proudly. "I'll be 97 next month, and I am now old enough
that I don't even need a driver's license anymore.

"The last time I went to my doctor, he examined me and asked if I had a driver's license. I told him yes and handed it to him. He took scissors out of the drawer, cut the license into pieces, and threw them in the waste basket, saying,'You won't need this anymore,' so I thanked him and left!"
 
papa tiger said:
Our neighbor is working in his yard when he is startled by a late model car crashing through the hedge
ending in his front lawn.

He rushes to help an elderly lady out of the car and sits her down in a lawn chair.
He's very excited and says, "you appear quite elderly to be driving".

"Well, yes, I am," she replies proudly. "I'll be 97 next month, and I am now old enough
that I don't even need a driver's license anymore.

"The last time I went to my doctor, he examined me and asked if I had a driver's license. I told him yes and handed it to him. He took scissors out of the drawer, cut the license into pieces, and threw them in the waste basket, saying,'You won't need this anymore,' so I thanked him and left!"
Click to expand...
hearty-laugh.gif
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top