Knowing one's station in life

[Bretrick]

I have never wanted to move above my station.
Coming from a blue-collar upbringing I appreciated the values my father's selfless life instilled in me.
I appreciate that many, many people wanted to improve their lot in life. I never had that ambition.
When I studied those who had "moved ahead" what I saw was a hint of falseness, a necessity to fit in, to "better oneself"
Almost as if they were slightly ashamed to come from a working-class background.
No such qualms with me. I am proud to be of working-class stock. To have gotten my hands dirty, to have contributed sweat in an industrialised society.
Maybe my own bias has shaped how I see the world and the classes we are all a part of.
Yes, I have looked down on a whole section of society, those "above me", many a time, in my mind I would say of those sitting behind a desk, or a counter, "what you do is not real work."
You do not and have never gotten your hands dirty, you have never sweated or toiled for 10 hours a day, only to collapse from exhaustion when arriving home.
Oh, that sounds a little nasty when I reread it.
But then I am only writing what is inside me. I have no malice to those who strive and have striven to improve their lot in life.
Everyone must do what they see fit to get through life with as little grief as possible.
Yes, my working-class background saw me encounter many pitfalls, almost brought me undone if truth be told.
Would I have wanted an easier life? Sure, but it was never to be. Without the ambition to "move up" I had to make the best of what I had.
Here I am, retired, with no meaningful possessions and debt free.
Life might become a little more trying as I move into my dotage, so be it. It is far too late to change the direction my life's journey has led me because I am not prepared to put in the work required for such an adventure.
What I have written is something that needed to come out. Why not share it with fellow members?
It might engender introspection in some of you.

 

[Aunt Bea]

My working life was never about status or prestige, it was about money.

I quickly realized that many of my superiors didn’t seem to possess any amazing skill or ability that justified their significantly higher salary.

I did my best to learn how to play the game and gradually work my way up the ladder so I could trade my time for as much money as possible.

For me, working for money was always an unnatural and terribly uncomfortable part of my life.

 

[Dr.Colosso]

I have never wanted to move above my station.
Coming from a blue-collar upbringing I appreciated the values my father's selfless life instilled in me.
I appreciate that many, many people wanted to improve their lot in life. I never had that ambition.
When I studied those who had "moved ahead" what I saw was a hint of falseness, a necessity to fit in, to "better oneself"
Almost as if they were slightly ashamed to come from a working-class background.
No such qualms with me. I am proud to be of working-class stock. To have gotten my hands dirty, to have contributed sweat in an industrialised society.
Maybe my own bias has shaped how I see the world and the classes we are all a part of.
Yes, I have looked down on a whole section of society, those "above me", many a time, in my mind I would say of those sitting behind a desk, or a counter, "what you do is not real work."
You do not and have never gotten your hands dirty, you have never sweated or toiled for 10 hours a day, only to collapse from exhaustion when arriving home.
Oh, that sounds a little nasty when I reread it.
But then I am only writing what is inside me. I have no malice to those who strive and have striven to improve their lot in life.
Everyone must do what they see fit to get through life with as little grief as possible.
Yes, my working-class background saw me encounter many pitfalls, almost brought me undone if truth be told.
Would I have wanted an easier life? Sure, but it was never to be. Without the ambition to "move up" I had to make the best of what I had.
Here I am, retired, with no meaningful possessions and debt free.
Life might become a little more trying as I move into my dotage, so be it. It is far too late to change the direction my life's journey has led me because I am not prepared to put in the work required for such an adventure.
What I have written is something that needed to come out. Why not share it with fellow members?
It might engender introspection in some of you.

I don't think I'm better off than you. I do think it's highly unfair that the ones who work hard, real work, get less. I worked in catering a few weeks after I finished my study cartography. My goodness. It was a few hours here, a few hours there and then bike half an hour to get from one place to the other. I only worked 20 hours a week for 800 a month and I was tired at the end of the day. Didnt need much cause I rented a room for 350 all inclusive.

My grandma, granddad lived with other women while married and dumped it on her to take care of 3 kids with zero education. So she worked in laundry houses and with psychiatric patients for lousy pay.

I think that's why my dad forced me to study. I hated it but had no choice. Especially high school was hard. I flopped at university and had to leave and eventually got a bachelor in cartography. That's not a hard job. You sit behind a desk and draw maps.

But I can now with kids work part time cause I live in Holland. I have a 1 bedroom apartment with 2 bunk beds and a nice bicycle. Another single mom with no education earns way less but also works part time and gets just as much because she gets extra from the govt.

Married, those in Holland shouldnt whine about pay. If they think they get too less, they shouldn't whine cause their man gets too much and that evens it out. My ex got 700 for working full time so they should stop whining that women get paid less.

The only ones who may complain are the Polish and Arabic working on the land, in catering or slaughterhouses for very lousy pay. They are taken advantage of.

It's not true that I never really worked. I did a study Geography. We had to get 2 meter soil out by hand the whole day for months and in the evening put it all in a computer for no pay.

 

[Warrigal]

My origins were not at all upmarket. Mum was a country girl who worked as a sales assistant in a department store as a shoe saleswoman. Dad also grew up in the country and was a state government public servant (clerk). He was also a veteran of WW II.

Mum lived in a large country town during the depression and as there was no work available then she stayed on at high school for the full 5 years instead of leaving at the age of 15 at Intermediate level. Dad left school at 15 and had no further education that I know of.

Mum wanted my sister and I to stay at school for the full 5 years of secondary education. She was pleased that I was studying to be a high school teacher because, even though she assumed that I would not work after marriage, she considered it something to fall back on if I were ever to be widow with children. As it turned out, I returned to teaching after my second child was 2 years old. I continued to teach until I retired because I loved what I was doing. The pay wasn't great, but it happened every fortnight and allowed Hubby and I to have a comfortable lifestyle that included frequent vacations and a good deal of travelling, including overseas.

I had grown up in a working class suburb and my teaching work was always in the same kind of housing. Hubby was an apprentice when I met him and later became a design draughtsman in an engineering drawing office. Neither of us was accustomed to mixing with people from more expensive suburbs. When I occasionally found myself at some function with such people I was often repelled by their pretentiousness. Why would I want to move to a new suburb where I would not fit in?

I'm still living in the same modest 3 bedroom brick veneer cottage that Hubby and I moved into in 1966. I would like to die here but if someday I need to enter a nursing home that will be OK as long as it isn't inhabited, or staffed by, snobs.

 

[hollydolly]

My working life was never about status or prestige, it was about money.

I quickly realized that many of my superiors didn’t seem to possess any amazing skill or ability that justified their significantly higher salary.

I did my best to learn how to play the game and gradually work my way up the ladder so I could trade my time for as much money as possible.

For me, working for money was always an unnatural and terribly uncomfortable part of my life.

I could have written that.... same! same.... !....

@Bretrick It's not about getting fingernails dirty.. no-one has to work down a mine to prove they're hard workers...

Mental ability takes much more of a toll on the body sometimes than physical work...


I'm not proud to be working class... or middle class.. or upper class.. I don't envy the class above me any more than I envy people in the so called class below me.....

I don't envy anyone.... but I do get slightly miffed at those who came by their money by not working....

 

[Della]

As soon as I saw the thread title I knew it must have been written by someone other than an American. "Station in life?" We don't have stations, just people born poor or born middle class or born rich and where they are now has to do with how hard they tried, or misfortune, or inheritance or health.

My father owned his own business, but I was the worst dressed girl in my school. My brothers are millionaires, I married an enlisted military man and never made much money myself. What station would you say I was?

i spent my working life making minimum wage. My hardest years were when I was a drive-through bank teller, I had a non-stop stream of customers from 8 to 6, and if my concentration slipped for one second I would be out of balance at the end of the day and pay the shortage myself. I once lost 100 dollars out of my monthly pay of 400 while I was supporting myself and my son in an apartment that cost 220 a month.
I never got my fingernails dirty, but I would come home too tired to watch TV and go straight to bed. As Holly said, mental exhaustion is rough.

 

[Beezer]

Ran into a guy on-line who was born with a silver spoon. He'd always brag about his wealth.
I told him...
"You were born on third base, don't pretend you hit a triple."
All of my other friends on that site were laughing.

 

[Beezer]

I always had the strong hands for work...the soft hands for piano and guitar.

 

[Dr.Colosso]

Neither of us was accustomed to mixing with people from more expensive suburbs. When I occasionally found myself at some function with such people I was often repelled by their pretentiousness.

My sister was a doctor, but not a specialist. Her specialist friends earn 10 times as much. They are really rich. Her husband was a manager. They're not snobs though and they have often given me 700 or so to go on a holiday with the kids. Also my dad, who was a teacher, always gave us money to do something fun.

But I don't understand how she can tolerate these friends. Some are kind. Her ex is one of them. He's now a surgeon and really rich but hello that's about life or death and she broke up cause he never had time to do anything else than study. He lived in a room with other students until he was 30 or so, drove a Fiat Panda, lived from 650 a month. Later he worked 80 hours a week. Now he has loads, but also pays loads of taxes. I think it's fair that he gets a lot. That's hard work.

But his wife at occasion can be snobby, like they go out a weekend and she arranges a restaurant that costs em 800 euro. Completely insane. They know my sis is not filthy rich. She also takes care of her sons and sons' gf. And another couple takes an insane expensive hotel and can't even give a euro to the guy who carries their bags. I'm like: Why do you hang out with them then? But whatever.

Not all rich people are snobs. My son's friend from primary school has mega rich parents, gigantic house and car, but lovely normal people. I said to his dad: No wonder he always wants to play at my house. It's much more beautiful than yours.

I had to protect that kid from a bully who also has rich parents, but slightly less rich and they were jealous. Unbelievable.

When I was a kid my parents lived in a fatzo house in as they called it the gold coast, cause my siblings were older and my mom worked and they were very frugal. He was a teacher and she a part time secretary. My dad sat in the cold to save 10 bucks, but we were seen as filthy rich. A friend whose parents had even more thought we were richer and was jealous and made comments, so I was ashamed of the fatzo house and when parents drove me back I lied that I lived in the cheap neighbourhood LOL. Sorry dad. He worked his ass off for that house.

 

[Been There]

I have never wanted to move above my station.
Coming from a blue-collar upbringing I appreciated the values my father's selfless life instilled in me.
I appreciate that many, many people wanted to improve their lot in life. I never had that ambition.
When I studied those who had "moved ahead" what I saw was a hint of falseness, a necessity to fit in, to "better oneself"
Almost as if they were slightly ashamed to come from a working-class background.
No such qualms with me. I am proud to be of working-class stock. To have gotten my hands dirty, to have contributed sweat in an industrialised society.
Maybe my own bias has shaped how I see the world and the classes we are all a part of.
Yes, I have looked down on a whole section of society, those "above me", many a time, in my mind I would say of those sitting behind a desk, or a counter, "what you do is not real work."
You do not and have never gotten your hands dirty, you have never sweated or toiled for 10 hours a day, only to collapse from exhaustion when arriving home.
Oh, that sounds a little nasty when I reread it.
But then I am only writing what is inside me. I have no malice to those who strive and have striven to improve their lot in life.
Everyone must do what they see fit to get through life with as little grief as possible.
Yes, my working-class background saw me encounter many pitfalls, almost brought me undone if truth be told.
Would I have wanted an easier life? Sure, but it was never to be. Without the ambition to "move up" I had to make the best of what I had.
Here I am, retired, with no meaningful possessions and debt free.
Life might become a little more trying as I move into my dotage, so be it. It is far too late to change the direction my life's journey has led me because I am not prepared to put in the work required for such an adventure.
What I have written is something that needed to come out. Why not share it with fellow members?
It might engender introspection in some of you.

Bretrick: I grew up on a farm and was really considering being a farmer during my life. I did very well in high school and one day while in class, I was called into the Guidance Office. My Guidance Counselor spoke to me a few minutes and then he suggested that I should consider taking the SAT coming up in a few weeks. Out of respect for my Counselor, I took the test and scored very high.

The next time I visited my GC, he suggested that I apply to one of the armed services academy’s. I went through my local congressman and he sponsored me on my application form to the Naval Academy. I was one of the lucky ones to be accepted. It turned out to be a good decision. I did return to my high school later and personally thanked my GC for his recommendations.

Sometimes, it’s not about having the ambition to do something, sometimes it’s just fortuitous or Grace that steps in.

 

[BJintheUK]

Well, I was born the wrong side of the blanket to an unmarried mother, who remained unmarried till she died. We never had two ha'pneys to rub together when I was a child, and due to various family circumstances there was a period just as I turned 6 when I had to live with my mum's aunt and uncle for 6 months, as the place she was lodging at didn't allow children.

When we finally got back together I could never stand to have my mum close to me, or hug me. I think it was the conditioning I was instilled with while living with the aunt and uncle. They kept telling me that I had to grow up and be a man (I was 6!) and when I left there to go back to living with my mum I had to leave all my toys behind.

It wasn't till a few months before she died (when I was 54 and she was 85) that I finally found I was able to hug my mum and kiss her, and even then I found it difficult and only did it the one time.

Regarding money, we didn't have any, and when I was 11 my mum became ill, and had to give up working as a tracer. For the next 6 years or so, she was at home, and struggling with her health, so when I became a teenager I could never afford to take a girl out. This situation got worse and worse, and as soon as I was able to leave school I did. However, being 15 and with no qualifications other than my 11+ I couldn't get a well paid job, and my first week's take home pay was £3/6shillings (£3.30p) for a 40 hr week.

Throughout my teenage years we struggled to keep paying the rent, and one week my mum's social security payment didn't come through, so all my wages that week went to paying the rent on our council flat, as well as food for us both and transport for me to get to work and back.

Throughout this time I watched my schoolmates families get more wealthy during the 1960s, and I felt that I was being punished for my poverty by society as a whole. We were lower than working class in their eyes. As a result I've never had much sympathy for the working class, and instead I somehow leapfrogged from bottom class to middle class after my sojourn as a mature student at university.

Today I'm still not rich, or even wealthy, but I do own my own house (a 3 bed semi) and am an OAP living on my state pension, as is my wife, and between the two of us we now get almost as much as I took home when working. So we're not doing badly at present, although there are some major things that need doing to the house that will need major investment soon.

Station in life? I don't feel I've ever had one but have always felt that somehow I was between stations, like a train that's forever moving from one station to another, but never stopping long enough to feel any sense of belonging.

 

[IrishEyes]

I have been up and down, from no money coming in from lack of jobs during the 1980 recession to living
comfortably later on. I realized about the more you make the more you spend and owe. I watched others
climb to a fuller financial life and the changes in their personalities that came with it for many, mostly those who
married into it. This made me watch myself closely how I looked at, talked to and treated all people.

Life is funny that way. People pressure you to buy the "Best" never asking if what you have serves you well. They do
love to drop the name of brands of things they purchase.

If you are happy where you are, the person you have become that is all that matters.
If I please some one who can look at me and it makes them feel better about them self
(in judgement or approval) that is on them. If I am found to be beneath them, so be it, it doesn't bother me.

I do know this, when we were down on the spectrum of needing things, more people in the same boat helped
us in food, clothing and mental support without requiring a pay back to do it. I can not say the same of the others.

I don't file myself in a category, I am "just me" and others well-off or poor, you accept me as me, I gladly share
the relationship/friendship right back.

 

[hollydolly]

Well, I was born the wrong side of the blanket to an unmarried mother, who remained unmarried till she died. We never had two ha'pneys to rub together when I was a child, and due to various family circumstances there was a period just as I turned 6 when I had to live with my mum's aunt and uncle for 6 months, as the place she was lodging at didn't allow children.

When we finally got back together I could never stand to have my mum close to me, or hug me. I think it was the conditioning I was instilled with while living with the aunt and uncle. They kept telling me that I had to grow up and be a man (I was 6!) and when I left there to go back to living with my mum I had to leave all my toys behind.

It wasn't till a few months before she died (when I was 54 and she was 85) that I finally found I was able to hug my mum and kiss her, and even then I found it difficult and only did it the one time.

Regarding money, we didn't have any, and when I was 11 my mum became ill, and had to give up working as a tracer. For the next 6 years or so, she was at home, and struggling with her health, so when I became a teenager I could never afford to take a girl out. This situation got worse and worse, and as soon as I was able to leave school I did. However, being 15 and with no qualifications other than my 11+ I couldn't get a well paid job, and my first week's take home pay was £3/6shillings (£3.30p) for a 40 hr week.

Throughout my teenage years we struggled to keep paying the rent, and one week my mum's social security payment didn't come through, so all my wages that week went to paying the rent on our council flat, as well as food for us both and transport for me to get to work and back.

Throughout this time I watched my schoolmates families get more wealthy during the 1960s, and I felt that I was being punished for my poverty by society as a whole. We were lower than working class in their eyes. As a result I've never had much sympathy for the working class, and instead I somehow leapfrogged from bottom class to middle class after my sojourn as a mature student at university.

Today I'm still not rich, or even wealthy, but I do own my own house (a 3 bed semi) and am an OAP living on my state pension, as is my wife, and between the two of us we now get almost as much as I took home when working. So we're not doing badly at present, although there are some major things that need doing to the house that will need major investment soon.

Station in life? I don't feel I've ever had one but have always felt that somehow I was between stations, like a train that's forever moving from one station to another, but never stopping long enough to feel any sense of belonging.

Beautifully written..... .....


Just as an aside.. what year were you earning £3/6.... I left school in 1970... and earned just £4/10 for a 40 hour week in an Punch tape operating room as an office junior...it was dreadful wages even then, and my father took every penny off me, except my bus fare back to work . I worked a 40 hour week.. and couldn't even buy a pair of tights much less new shoes

 

[againstthegrain]

Bretrick: I grew up on a farm and was really considering being a farmer during my life. I did very well in high school and one day while in class, I was called into the Guidance Office. My Guidance Counselor spoke to me a few minutes and then he suggested that I should consider taking the SAT coming up in a few weeks. Out of respect for my Counselor, I took the test and scored very high.

The next time I visited my GC, he suggested that I apply to one of the armed services academy’s. I went through my local congressman and he sponsored me on my application form to the Naval Academy. I was one of the lucky ones to be accepted. It turned out to be a good decision. I did return to my high school later and personally thanked my GC for his recommendations.

Sometimes, it’s not about having the ambition to do something, sometimes it’s just fortuitous or Grace that steps in.

Much respect to you and all the graduates of our military colleges. Being accepted and then graduating from a US military college is no small accomplishment. They typically turn out top flight people and somehow after reading your posts over time I'm not surprised to find you are a Naval Academy grad.

I am somewhat familiar with West Point since 2 of my best friends father's were graduates and other connections I made when I lived near WP.

 

[Dr.Colosso]

When my dad was in a home for elderly my mother said to the nurse: One daughter comes with the bus and train and the other comes in a Tesla. So that nurse was like: oh that must be nice. Wish I had a Tesla.
I felt sorry for my sis and stood up for her and said: But that was bought from an inheritance from his parents.
I told my brother and he joked: Yeah they're a bunch of paupers who live 10 high but they do drive a Tesla LOL.

 

[outlander]

The sad fact is most people judge others by what they own or what they do for a living. That has nothing to do with the true value of a person. This occurs because society brainwashes people to believe they must achieve a certain standard of living or they are not normal and cannot be happy.

I feel very fortunate to have experienced many "stations in life". I have struggled to make ends meet, been considered middle class, and owned a very successful small business. Strangely I now choose to live a very frugal life even though I don't need to. I think it is because I find little value or pleasure in "acquiring" things without proper need to justify the expense. Being a minimalist is like a challenge that brings satisfaction and peace into my life, things that having lots if money never could.

I judge people by what they do and how they act, their station in life is of little consequence to me. I have very few friends because I find almost all people are consumed by the rat race, something I find unpleasant and almost intolerable.

 

[Beezer]

It's a shame the OP's father never told him to reach further than his grasp.
I always tell my daughter's..."Why just fit in when you were born to be amazing?"

 

[oldman]

I thought I wanted to be an engineer, but I also enjoyed flying. I took on a double major in college; Mechanical Engineering and Aviation Engineering. I tried being an ME for a few years at DuPont, but sitting in a cubicle for a few years and making drafts was not what I was cutout for. I went to flight school and was hired by Air Wisconsin before being recruited by United.

When I flew for Air Wisconsin, I flew under the trademark of United Express. I really wanted to fly the big jets. My first big jet was a Boeing 737 and then the 757 & 767, and then the 747 before going back to the 757 & 767. The only difference between the 757 & 767 is that the 757 is a single aisle plane and the 767 is a double aisle plane and takes on more passengers.

 

[oldman]

It's a shame the OP's father never told him to reach further than his grasp.
I always tell my daughter's..."Why just fit in when you were born to be amazing?"

My son wasn’t sure what he wanted to do in life. I tried my best to get him to follow in my footsteps and either go in the Marines or go to college. I told him no matter what he decided, just be sure to reach for the stars. He went to trade school to learn electronics and is now a Supervisor for the state in their IT department. I get free tech support at home.

 

[Dr.Colosso]

Strangely I now choose to live a very frugal life even though I don't need to. I think it is because I find little value or pleasure in "acquiring" things without proper need to justify the expense. Being a minimalist is like a challenge that brings satisfaction and peace into my life, things that having lots if money never could.

My uncle had a small farm. It was first from his dad who lived with them. Then they built a road and he got a lot of money for his land. But he gave everything away to some good cause and he lived extreme frugal. He ate baked onions for dinner as vegetables with potatoes and a bit of meat I think. He wore clothes from the cheapest shop. 5 euro for a shirt. He gave thousands to the evangelical broadcast and then he had no cent himself. They were so kind to give it back.

His son is a millionair who spends loads and lives in a gigantic house with cattle for a hobby. I think it's because his dad was too frugal.

 

[Dr.Colosso]

It's a shame the OP's father never told him to reach further than his grasp.
I always tell my daughter's..."Why just fit in when you were born to be amazing?"

If everyone has a job you have to study for then who does the work? My country has a 'knowledge economy'. That means everyone wants a nice well paid job. But now the electricians, plumbers etc. are scarse and can ask loads.

 

[Rae]

I have worked at low paying jobs but my husband made up for it with his job. I had jobs that sounded like they were better and they were but still did not make enough money if I was supporting myself.

My family were hard workers and did well for our family. I thought we were richer than most but that was from a child's point of view. Actually we were middle working class.

 

[hollydolly]

When my dad was in a home for elderly my mother said to the nurse: One daughter comes with the bus and train and the other comes in a Tesla. So that nurse was like: oh that must be nice. Wish I had a Tesla.
I felt sorry for my sis and stood up for her and said: But that was bought from an inheritance from his parents.
I told my brother and he joked: Yeah they're a bunch of paupers who live 10 high but they do drive a Tesla LOL.

Tesla's are very common in the UK..nothing to brag about....

 

[officerripley]

Yes, I have looked down on a whole section of society, those "above me", many a time, in my mind I would say of those sitting behind a desk, or a counter, "what you do is not real work."

Having jobs that required me to both sit behind a desk or stand behind a counter and having to deal with "the public" or wealthy college students who saw me as nothing more than a hurdle to get what they felt they were entitled to and to get it right now, I can tell you that kind of job can indeed be "real work." True it's not technically physical (especially when sitting behind a desk), but studies have shown that emotional stress (such as being yelled at, "I don't give a f*ck what the policy or your boss says, I want that form/my money back/a spot in that closed class right now!!") can cause real physical effect on the body.

Also, as to sitting behind a desk: a doctor told a co-worker that she was having so much pain from a minor car accident because the fact that she had worked behind a desk since she was 18 had kind of ruined her body--no, she's not overweight--he said that sitting behind a desk and pounding away at a typewriter or a keyboard caused major problems in the neck, back, shoulders, etc., that humans aren't made to sit behind a desk and pound a keyboard. (And yet, so many of us have had to in order to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table.)

So, "real work"? That includes being yelled at and humiliated IMO and usually for just enough money to get by on. IMO, here in the U.S., those that make a lot of money are the yellers, not the yelled-at.

 

[gruntlabor]

I have never wanted to move above my station.
Coming from a blue-collar upbringing I appreciated the values my father's selfless life instilled in me.
I appreciate that many, many people wanted to improve their lot in life. I never had that ambition.
When I studied those who had "moved ahead" what I saw was a hint of falseness, a necessity to fit in, to "better oneself"
Almost as if they were slightly ashamed to come from a working-class background.
No such qualms with me. I am proud to be of working-class stock. To have gotten my hands dirty, to have contributed sweat in an industrialised society.
Maybe my own bias has shaped how I see the world and the classes we are all a part of.
Yes, I have looked down on a whole section of society, those "above me", many a time, in my mind I would say of those sitting behind a desk, or a counter, "what you do is not real work."
You do not and have never gotten your hands dirty, you have never sweated or toiled for 10 hours a day, only to collapse from exhaustion when arriving home.
Oh, that sounds a little nasty when I reread it.
But then I am only writing what is inside me. I have no malice to those who strive and have striven to improve their lot in life.
Everyone must do what they see fit to get through life with as little grief as possible.
Yes, my working-class background saw me encounter many pitfalls, almost brought me undone if truth be told.
Would I have wanted an easier life? Sure, but it was never to be. Without the ambition to "move up" I had to make the best of what I had.
Here I am, retired, with no meaningful possessions and debt free.
Life might become a little more trying as I move into my dotage, so be it. It is far too late to change the direction my life's journey has led me because I am not prepared to put in the work required for such an adventure.
What I have written is something that needed to come out. Why not share it with fellow members?
It might engender introspection in some of you.

I agree. To leave one's own class and enter another is a recipe for unhappiness. And, I would add, know your place. EVERY.SINGLE.RELATIONSHIP has a pecking order.