Sister-in-Law, what to do?

I drink because I don't have a reason not to. I'm constantly in pain, mentally and physically, and opioids don't work. I use it for a distraction, along with watching movies, to lessen the impact.
Thanks for the honesty!! I am sorry your in so much pain. I know that many people on this forum suffer from constant pain, and most suffer from it on regular occasions. None of us have got this one down to a completely satisfactory outcome. There always will be pain. The challenge for me is to not be IN suffering while the pain is present. There is a difference. Most of our suffering comes from the narrative we are telling ourselves.
 
You may want to contact social services in her area & have them check her living conditions out along with her. Let senior services in that area take care of matters. Just be careful that in trying to help her, that you don't end up responsible for having to clean up her problems, making sure her bills/business is done each month, dealing with health issues & other things associated with her.

My husband & I found out the hard way with his sister in a similar situation. In trying to do the right thing, for about a three year period, it was like a never ending sh!tshow. She brought it to an abrupt end one day when she decided to move away from the area without notice. That's when we handed her everything back & walked away. He & I both agreed we wouldn't ever do what we did for her again.

I don't know what type meds she is on (if any) or if she is able to take them as she should. However, if someone wants to put her on head meds like they did with my SIL, it made matters so much worse. That is a long story in itself.

I don't mean to sound harsh to you wanting to help, but this was my experience & I don't wish what we went through on anyone else.
 

My dad was 2-1/2 hours away and I contacted senior services in his small town to mow his lawn . Someone came out every other week to mow and the price was pretty nominal. This was 10 years ago though. Stubborn Norwegian, I’m glad he at least let me set that up for him.

We’ve had problems trying to help other family members. Would not ever do it again.
 
You may want to contact social [senior] services in her area & have them check her living conditions out along with her. Let senior services in that area take care of matters.
My dad was 2-1/2 hours away and I contacted senior services in his small town to mow his lawn . Someone came out every other week to mow and the price was pretty nominal.
Income doesn't matter. You only have to be over 65 to qualify for Senior Services.
 
Just a one time deal.
He's got thousands from her
Is he a one-man band or does he work for a company? I wonder if that is the reason she doesn't want to get anything done in her house, perhaps she knows that the contractor overcharged her and doesn't trust anyone to do the work which may be needed to be done? There are contractors who do overcharge women but, would think twice before trying that with a man.
 
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Just a one time deal.
He's got thousands from her
There are so many pieces-of-$hit who take advantage of people like your SIL. My MIL was pretty good about checking with the Better Business Bureau when needed things done if we didn't know anyone ourselves for her to call.

We've made enough contacts through the years from having things done, that we go on their recommendations. If they don't do it, they know someone who does & it's people they would use for their home.
 
Come to find out she has a guy there today replacing the well pump in her garage, it was cracked and needs changing.
The guy doing it is the same guy who was going to work on one of our houses. He looked the house over, shook my hand and said he'd send me a quote by the weekend.
Never heard from him again. He wouldn't return calls, answer emails or texts, he just ghosted us and we never figured out why.
I hope he treats her right.
 


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