Some People Just DON'T Understand!

ClassicRockr

ClassicRockr

Well-known Member
When we left our boat at the Marine Service Center last week, for winterizing, the Lead Mechanic (42 years old) asked me how often we take it out on the water. I told him that we are "fair-weather boaters", which means: if the forecast calls for a windy day, possibility of rain or it's too hot, we don't take it out. I also told him that the boat doesn't go out unless my wife is on it, and since she works a full-time/Monday thru Friday job, it only goes out on the weekends or during a vacation she takes. He looked at me and said, "you need a buddy!" and I said, "I've got one, it's my wife! She can fish, shoot and loves NFL. What more could I want?" He was a little stunned when I told him that.

When I picked up the boat yesterday, he was curious again why my wife has to be on the boat for it to go out. He said, "if I waited for my wife to have a day off, I'd never go fishing." I went on to tell him that we don't believe in "Boys Night Out" or "Girls Night Out" either.........if we each had friends. I told him, "doing things apart is not the way we conduct our marriage."

Anyway, he was just pretty stunned that I wouldn't take the boat out without her. Well, all I can say is..."sorry dude, it just isn't going to happen!".
 

Absolutely no criticism from me Rocker...you live your life the way you want to and not to please anyone else...but for me personally I couldn't live in a marriage like yours..waaaayyy too claustrophobic for me!!
 
The one thing we figured out that we had a BIG thing in common between us........we were both "clingy". I was that way in my previous relationships and the ladies didn't like it. Fortunately, I met a lady that did like it........my wife! During the weeknights and weekends anyone could find us doing everything together. Just the way we like it.

hollydolly said:
Absolutely no criticism from me Rocker...you live your life the way you want to and not to please anyone else...but for me personally I couldn't live in a marriage like yours..waaaayyy too claustrophobic for me!!
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We're like that too Rockr, my husband wouldn't have as much fun going out camping or fishing without me, I fish, shoot and watch a little bit of football but not a big fan of the NFL. We like doing stuff together, there may be a day when one of us will be gone, so these times make some wonderful memories for the survivor. :love_heart:
 
ClassicRockr said:
When we left our boat at the Marine Service Center last week, for winterizing, the Lead Mechanic (42 years old) asked me how often we take it out on the water. I told him that we are "fair-weather boaters", which means: if the forecast calls for a windy day, possibility of rain or it's too hot, we don't take it out. I also told him that the boat doesn't go out unless my wife is on it, and since she works a full-time/Monday thru Friday job, it only goes out on the weekends or during a vacation she takes. He looked at me and said, "you need a buddy!" and I said, "I've got one, it's my wife! She can fish, shoot and loves NFL. What more could I want?" He was a little stunned when I told him that.

When I picked up the boat yesterday, he was curious again why my wife has to be on the boat for it to go out. He said, "if I waited for my wife to have a day off, I'd never go fishing." I went on to tell him that we don't believe in "Boys Night Out" or "Girls Night Out" either.........if we each had friends. I told him, "doing things apart is not the way we conduct our marriage."

Anyway, he was just pretty stunned that I wouldn't take the boat out without her. Well, all I can say is..."sorry dude, it just isn't going to happen!".
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I think it sounds great, if I had a best friend (husband) and he felt the same, we would want to do things like that together;) Happy for you guys, you found your best friend and married her;)
 
My husband and I are rarely separated unless I'm at work. Otherwise, we go everywhere together. He's about the only person I can stand to be around for an extended period of time.... and that includes my kids..
 
I might have used this before, but Clint Eastwood was talking about how a marriage is made in heaven..."but so is thunder and lightning"! In a solid marriage, you do "become one" in many ways. You tend to read each others thoughts, finish each other's sentences...and on occasions even begin to look alike!:) The "buddy system" is a little different than "a night with your buddies". My Wife and I are very comfortable spending time together, and since I have retired, we have grown closer. Most of my "buddies" were connected to work, and we didn't have much more in common. We lead a very quiet life together and are happy. I know that every one is different, and every marriage is different,and we are all not in the "same boat"!:):)
 
This is our second boat. Had one in Colorado, but consigned it to the marine dealer we bought it from to sell for us.

I was sort of shocked to find that there are many couples, young and old/older, that don't do much together and never have. Some even go on vacations separately. Something we'd never do, but that is us. Shoot, there are men and women who are in careers that keep them away from home a lot and, for some spouses, that is fine with them.

Years ago, I dated a lady, who was going thru a divorce and one of the reason's for the divorce, as told to me by the lady, was that her husband was always working. He be home for holidays and vacations, but the rest of the time was taken up with overtime hours where he worked. Anyway, she, and her two teen kids, lived in a very nice house in a nice upper-scale neighborhood. The had a nice atrium and Jacuzzi in the backyard, ski boat, nice motorhome and a jet ski. What amazed me b/c I never seen this before, a tv in every room of the house, including the bathrooms!! She told me that she had a talk with him, before they split, and told him that she wanted him home more. He told her, "you can either have me here or have all this stuff you and the kids have. We don't have all of this nice stuff off of my hourly wage!" Funny, after he moved out, he moved in with a lady that both him and his wife knew from the Good Sam Club (motorhome) they were in. And, this lady actually left her husband as well.
 
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My husband and I enjoy doing lots of things together, we share many interests. But no couple shares every interest. There are things I enjoy that he doesn't and vice versa. So we do some things alone or with other people. It would be too smothering otherwise. Unless a couple truly shares every single interest, then you'll have to do things you have no interest in just to be with your spouse. And a girls' night out or boys' night out is fun.
 
He didn't understand. Well I understand and I'm very happy for you and your wife. It's a wonderful relationship that works for you.
I'm a little envious :)
 
We have time together..time apart..I'm not into boats...We always keep in touch..when I don't want to be bothered..I just switch my phone off..

Simple..
 
My late husband was an avid fisherman. I find fishing only slightly preferable to being stuck in the eye with a sharp stick. I like wandering around antique shops. He found wandering around antique shops only slightly preferable to being stuck in the eye with a sharp stick. So he went fishing on Saturdays and I went to antique shops on Saturdays. Every so often, I went out on the boat with him; every so often, he went to antique shops with me. We managed to make this arrangement work for 37 years.

My boyfriend is an avid motorcyclist; I find riding a motorcycle only slightly preferable to being poked in the tailbone with a sharp stick. I still like wandering around antique shops; he finds wandering around antique shops only slightly preferable to being beaten with a motorcycle chain. So, he rides his motorcycle; I go to antique shops. Occasionally, I get on the back and reluctantly go riding with him; occasionally he reluctantly steps foot inside an antique shop with me. We've managed to make this arrangement work for 5+ years now.

I'm not of the opinion that couples need to be joined at the hip or the brain to have a successful marriage/relationship. If that's what works for them, that's great. I'm all for whatever makes people happy. For me, variety is the spice of life. That's what works for me.
 
When my wife is here at home doing some writing for her Prayer Books thing, I'm doing something else in our apartment. When she was putting together her Sea Shell pictures, I was doing something else in our apartment. Now, she is wrapping her Sea Shell pictures and I'm on this computer and writing this. When she is at work during the week, I will sometimes run errands that need to be done. So, we don't do the same things together all the time. But, the things that we do together........we both LOVE doing them!
 

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