Staying positive during difficulties

chic

chic

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U.S.
How do you stay positive during the difficult times we all face now and then? A positive attitude can go far to promote healing, wellness and tranquility.

I tend to take a step back from a situation, even when this is difficult to do. I remind myself that nothing lasts forever. When I can, I meditate upon the good times of the old days until I can see, feel, taste, hear and almost touch them. It brings me peace that lasts for hours.

Also when I can, I like to go for a walk in the woods and take pictures of the scenery and the wildlife. It brings a sense of eternity that is restful and soothing because life goes on there in a sort of predetermined order that is beautiful to behold.

What do you do?
 
That is exactly what I do, Chic. I have problems walking, so a walk in the woods is out, but there are many videos on the PC. Walks in the woods, Japanese gardens, etc. I have a good imagination like yourself. I can put myself there mentally.
I don't know if I would call it being positive. I think of it more as acceptance. I follow you completely. My memories are everything to me. We had a great life together. Many good things to think about.
The pain is always just underneath the surface though. It doesn't really go away. I can go for days feeling great. I can think of my past life with nothing but happy thoughts. Then some unexpected thing will set me off. I was watching the Democratic debate. When it was over, Bernie Sander's wife came over, took his arm, patted his shoulder and just looked at him with so much love and admiration. Suddenly everything I have lost came flooding back to me and I cried my eyes out.
Yes. Acceptance is the key. Life is what it is. I have had a better one than 95% of all of the human beings who ever walked this planet. I am content. When I go, I will be cremated, my ashes mixed with her's, and we will be returned together to the Universe.
 
Underock1 said:
Not being contrary here, Laurie. I get that. For the majority, what you say is true. Some would see it as being better off.
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I agree with Underrock1, I never look at a cemetery as a place a person wouldn't want to be. I believe we go on to a better existence. I do love to walk through old cemeteries. I find them very relaxing. Great place to meditate.
 
I turn on my MP3 player and hike up a sweat. Walking an hour or more with great tunes. I can sort stuff out in my head then write my to do list when I get back to the car. If that doesn't work...vodka.
 
I try to look at the big picture and put things in perspective, and remember that a lot of other people are going through much worse things than I am, that usually helps. Also another nature lover here, walks in wooded areas, wildlife, night skies, clouds, sunrises, sunsets...all feel good for me.
 
Underock1 said:
Not being contrary here, Laurie. I get that. For the majority, what you say is true. Some would see it as being better off.
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Absolutely. Many see it as better off to be dead and out of it. Those who are suffering, those whose families and friends have predeceased them see death as a release. Throw in a sculpted,beautiful, quiet tree laden cemetery and they're halfway there.
 
For as long as I lived in southern Arizona, it was getting up into the mountains. I could lie on an outcropping, feel the breeze, smell the firs, listen to the birds. It was wonderful. Just remember to keep an eye out for bears, tho' ...... I was told in no uncertain terms to "move it, lady!" one time. Seems I was too close to a favorite berry patch. :)

My kids had disabilities. That was tough. I had a mantra I would repeat then "if it isn't going to kill my kids, I'm not going to let it kill me".
 
I have my "TIHII" theory (This Is How It Is) or in other words, "tee-hee". When I get to feeling sorry for myself and get the "THIS WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN TO ME!!!! IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO TURN OUT THIS WAY!!! I WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE HERE DOING THIS, I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THERE DOING THAT!!! I try to remember TIHII, all the wailing in the world isn't going to change anything and I put on my big-girl panties and try to make lemonade out of lemons. Most of the time it works.....sometimes all my big girl panties are in the wash and I go ahead and feel sorry for myself.....
 
I look for little victories and little problems that I know I can solve and that changes my whole attitude and puts me in a positive frame of mind.
 
jujube said:
all the wailing in the world isn't going to change anything and I put on my big-girl panties and try to make lemonade out of lemons. Most of the time it works.....sometimes all my big girl panties are in the wash and I go ahead and feel sorry for myself.....
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Excellent!! :D [ especially the part following "sometimes"...... ]
 
Lately I've been remembering what my great grandfather use to say to me when I was a child, and I either hurt myself, or had my feelings hurt. "OK, the worlds still out there, now what are you going to do about it?" It always made me think of ways to get on with life. :wave:
 
I always try to remember the saying what doesn't kill you make you stronger and by now I think I'm Hercules, lol.
 
jujube said:
I have my "TIHII" theory (This Is How It Is) or in other words, "tee-hee". When I get to feeling sorry for myself and get the "THIS WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN TO ME!!!! IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO TURN OUT THIS WAY!!! I WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE HERE DOING THIS, I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THERE DOING THAT!!! I try to remember TIHII, all the wailing in the world isn't going to change anything and I put on my big-girl panties and try to make lemonade out of lemons. Most of the time it works.....sometimes all my big girl panties are in the wash and I go ahead and feel sorry for myself.....
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Very good, jujube. TIHII. Many people just refuse to accept that. I take the opportunity to re-post a favorite of mine.
."Everything that has a beginning, has an ending. Make your peace with that and all will be well."
As Rocky just said, your "sometimes" remark says a lot. Nothing works 100% because TIHII.
 
Stormy said:
I always try to remember the saying what doesn't kill you make you stronger and by now I think I'm Hercules, lol.
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Well that's a positive thought. Sometimes I'd rather be weak with an easier life. LOL. :cool:
 
jujube said:
As Sonny Kapoor (Dev Patel) says in The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, "Everything will be all right in the end... if it's not all right, then it's not yet the end. "
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I respectfully disagree with that. If you've had friends and family members commit suicide ( as I have) and you're the survivor with the burden of loss upon your shoulders, you realise how meaningless platitudes can be. You must reach somewhere outside of yourself (or deep inside) for strength and peace. :rolleyes:
 
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