The General Humor Thread

funny demotivational poster
 

This priest decided to skip church one Sunday morning and go play golf...​

He told his assistant that he wasn't feeling well. He went out the back door and got in his car. He drove to a golf course in another city, so nobody would know him.

He teed off on the first hole.

Just then, a huge gust of wind caught his ball, carried it an extra hundred yards and dropped it right in the hole, for a 450 yard hole in one!!!

An angel looked at God and said "What'd you do that for?"

God smiled and said "Who's he going to tell?"
 
The Montana State Department of Fish and Wildlife is advising golfers to take extra precautions, and be on the alert for bears while playing on Gallatin, Helena, and Lewis and Clark National Forest’s golf courses.

They advise golfers to wear noise-producing devices such as little bells on their clothing to alert, but not to startle the bears unexpectedly.

They also advise golfers to carry pepper spray in the case of an encounter with a bear.

They say that it’s also a good idea to watch for signs of bear activity on the courses. They recommend that golfers be educated so that they can recognize the difference between Black bear and Grizzly bear droppings.

Black bear droppings are smaller and contain remains of nuts, berries and possibly squirrel, rabbit or gopher fur.

Grizzly bear droppings have small bells, golf-gloves, sunglasses and other similar golf items in them and they usually smell like pepper spray.
 
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