The most important lesson

Beezer said:
Believe that the good you do today will come back to you down the road. Even if this rings untrue, I still think it's the right mindset to have...to live your life by.
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While not sure it is my most important 'lesson', i come at this from the other side---
i have, even when i was struggling single Mom considered it important to do what i can for others where i am with what i have and that as long as i make sure basics are there for my family, including any 'pets', any windfalls i get are to be shared.

But to support your side of it i can tell you every time i gave to others tho leaving me low on cash till payday--within 3 days i'd get some kind of compensating good i wasn't expecting. A promotion, bonus--chance to earn a little extra. Or someone would be trying to get rid of something i could use and wanted no cash just to have it no longer take up space in their home. Usually this happened within 3-5 days. Sometimes (maybe twice out of dozens of times i gave when sometime asked for a 'loan') i'd actually get paid back. But more often what i received came from elsewhere.
 
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MACKTEXAS said:
Whether we realize it or not, we serve as an example to those around us through our words and actions.
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Much more than most people realize. i've been lucky to learn a few times how something i said or did had been useful, beneficial for someone else. Usually long after i did/said whatever. That was enough to continue with my usual habits.
 
IrishEyes said:
How forgiveness cleans up so much anger, hurt and opens doors you can't get open.
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sunflower.jpg

Simon Wiesenthal a prominent Holocaust survivor and Nazi hunter, explored the complexities of forgiveness in his book "The Sunflower: On the Possibilities and Limits of Forgiveness". The book details a real-life encounter where a dying Nazi soldier sought Wiesenthal's forgiveness for his wartime actions, forcing Wiesenthal to confront the difficult question of whether forgiveness is possible or appropriate in the context of the Holocaust.

Wiesenthal's book and the subsequent discussions it sparked, highlight the diverse perspectives on forgiveness within the Jewish community regarding the Holocaust. Some, like Wiesenthal himself in certain contexts, grapple with the question of whether forgiveness is even possible for such atrocities, while others, like some Holocaust survivors, struggle with the emotional and moral implications of extending forgiveness to those who perpetrated such horrific acts.

The book and related discussions also explore the different understandings of forgiveness. Some argue that forgiveness is a personal process of letting go of grievance, not an endorsement of the actions forgiven. Others, like some Jewish thinkers, emphasize that forgiveness can only be earned through genuine repentance and restitution

hollydolly said:
Sometimes I think no matter how often I get beaten over the head with the obvious big stick..I just never learn!
The trouble is..I trust people too easily.. and it never fails to sideswipe me...
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For what it's worth, something in my life that happened 40 years ago, left an indelible mark, that to this day will often change my mood. Sharing it might be cathartic but that sharing might just as easily distress others, so I keep it to myself. That big stick is not exclusive.
 
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hollydolly said:
Sometimes I think no matter how often I get beaten over the head with the obvious big stick..I just never learn!

The trouble is..I trust people too easily.. and it never fails to sideswipe me...
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I had that problem for a long time, till i learned to trust my instincts over people in my early 40's. Some of the worst things happened because i gave someone benefit of the doubt when my gut was screaming not to trust them.
 
@horseless carriage said..."Others, like some Jewish thinkers, emphasize that forgiveness can only be earned through genuine repentance and restitution." Not just Jewish thinkers, there's some RedLetter scriptures in Matthew indicating that Jesus said repentance, amends and an effort not to repeat the offence is required.

Me, i can forgive fairly easily with or without apology, but that doesn't mean i will ever put myself in position that would allow the person to harm me again.
 
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horseless carriage said:
View attachment 443735

Simon Wiesenthal a prominent Holocaust survivor and Nazi hunter, explored the complexities of forgiveness in his book "The Sunflower: On the Possibilities and Limits of Forgiveness". The book details a real-life encounter where a dying Nazi soldier sought Wiesenthal's forgiveness for his wartime actions, forcing Wiesenthal to confront the difficult question of whether forgiveness is possible or appropriate in the context of the Holocaust.

Wiesenthal's book and the subsequent discussions it sparked, highlight the diverse perspectives on forgiveness within the Jewish community regarding the Holocaust. Some, like Wiesenthal himself in certain contexts, grapple with the question of whether forgiveness is even possible for such atrocities, while others, like some Holocaust survivors, struggle with the emotional and moral implications of extending forgiveness to those who perpetrated such horrific acts.

The book and related discussions also explore the different understandings of forgiveness. Some argue that forgiveness is a personal process of letting go of grievance, not an endorsement of the actions forgiven. Others, like some Jewish thinkers, emphasize that forgiveness can only be earned through genuine repentance and restitution


For what it's worth, something in my life that happened 40 years ago, left an indelible mark, that to this day will often change my mood. Sharing it might be cathartic but that sharing might just as easily distress others, so I keep it to myself. That big stick is not exclusive.
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I have not had the things done to me that the Holocaust victims had done to them. I may feel different if I had or maybe the same. Some things I have forgiven for did make a difference in my life.
Changed me for a time. Made me feel small, used and nonessential. Somethings I tucked down so deeply I didn't even remember them consciously for over 25 years. But the shadow of them inside roamed about holding me down. Once those things flooded out, I was free to be a person I always wanted to be and I made up for it in record time.
I didn't look back in pain and wonder who/what I would have been if those things hadn't happened, I was too busy looking at how relieved to finally know... it was NOT me after all. I will never let those things/people change my life again by holding onto the what could have been. They got enough without me knowing it. Forget what they did: never, Forgive them: yes Because I own me now they don't. To never forgive you have to hold on to those memories like a treasure you cling to tightly. I remember them yes, rarely, but they can't design my life anymore.
 
It took me way too long to learn that there's no such thing as complete safety or happiness. I always used to think that if I could live somewhere different, it'd be safer and I'd be happier. Or if I could be with the right person or in a different situation, I'd be safer and happier. I finally figured out that there is no place or person or situation that gives you complete safety and happiness. All you can do is sometimes change things so that maybe it'll be slightly less dangerous or sad but that's it. Wishing for better than that is a waste of time.
 
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