Un-Friending People is Difficult

fureverywhere

fureverywhere

beloved friend who will always be with us in spiri
Location
Northern NJ, USA
Hum, don't think I ever did that before. Okay I've dropped off of sites when I realize the political climate is completely against my beliefs. But don't think I've ever un-friended anyone before. I mean one thing I'm passionate about is gun control. But on other sites I regularly defend some folks who are completely locked and loaded. One gentleman hails from Texas. There are members who will use Texas as the butt of every conservative joke they can come up with. But I know better. I lived in Austin for a time, used to be thee happening place for liberals and a great progressive music scene. So yes I will defend Tex, even with his rifle collection it's okay.

But most of us just have our hot button topics...deal breakers if you would.
One lady I regularly converse with is bible belt conservative, but we get along. Don't talk religion or politics and it's all good...many other things to discuss instead. She's really a happy intelligent person and I consider her a friend.

But some topics "Black Lives Matter"...you bettah believe they do, anti-Semitism...don't get me started...homophobia is any context and no I don't have to deal with you. If someone can't understand the historical suffering of blacks, Jews, homosexuals and accept them completely...really I have better things to do than argue about it.

Off my soapbox and party on.
 

We can be friends even though our beliefs differ, sometimes greatly. Some people don't understand that. Some people think that if you're not "with me", you must be against me.
 
Yeah but just certain things go completely against your value system ya know?
 

I was unfriended by someone on FB (not a real life friend) because I posted something in favour of gay marriage. Oh well...

I have another friend who sometimes posts links to anti-Obama or right wing stuff but he never says anything hateful. But I ignore it and he ignores all my liberal stuff. We are friends mainly due to love of photography and being grandparents and beaches.
 
Fur, if political discussions bother you, just avoid the forums and threads.

I've never unfriended anyone online. My computer is just a magic box connecting me to others around the world for a time to share and enjoy. If it becomes upsetting, I just shut the magic box off and rejoin the real world. Problem solved. It's not like it's someone I live with or work with. That would be a problem.
 
fureverywhere said:
Hum, don't think I ever did that before. Okay I've dropped off of sites when I realize the political climate is completely against my beliefs. But don't think I've ever un-friended anyone before. I mean one thing I'm passionate about is gun control. But on other sites I regularly defend some folks who are completely locked and loaded. One gentleman hails from Texas. There are members who will use Texas as the butt of every conservative joke they can come up with. But I know better. I lived in Austin for a time, used to be thee happening place for liberals and a great progressive music scene. So yes I will defend Tex, even with his rifle collection it's okay.

But most of us just have our hot button topics...deal breakers if you would.
One lady I regularly converse with is bible belt conservative, but we get along. Don't talk religion or politics and it's all good...many other things to discuss instead. She's really a happy intelligent person and I consider her a friend.

But some topics "Black Lives Matter"...you bettah believe they do, anti-Semitism...don't get me started...homophobia is any context and no I don't have to deal with you. If someone can't understand the historical suffering of blacks, Jews, homosexuals and accept them completely...really I have better things to do than argue about it.

Off my soapbox and party on.
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I assume you are talking about FB.... You don't have to "unfriend" them... just "Unfollow" them.. that way they stay on your friend list but you are not subjected to any of their nonsense.
 
fureverywhere said:
Yeah but just certain things go completely against your value system ya know?
Click to expand...

I agree.. and I understand what you are saying. In real life... I have found that if someone holds beliefs or values that are so far the opposite of mine.. there is little reason to be friends... We have very little in common and there is no basis for a friendship... on the other hand.. when they are relatives.. it's a little harder.. I have a few relatives that are on my FB friend list the I have "unfollowed" rather than see their posts..

But as for casual acquaintances... if someone blurts out things that are the antitheses of my belief system... I'm not interested in even being around them. I have no problem culling them from the herd. Life is too short to waste time on people that upset you.
 
I don’t understand why unfriending is so difficult. It’s just the click of a mouse/computer key.

OTOH, to some people being on another person’s friends list is almost as important as life itself. So they assume everyone else feels that way, but that’s their problem. Maybe it's time to step away from the computer and make an effort to make some real friends (versus imaginary friends on a website.)

The importance and significance of being/staying on someone’s “friend” list (on FB or anyplace else) is often waaaay over-rated.

“You did/said something I don’t like” or “You’re (quasi) friends with so-and-so therefore I’ll unfriend you”. Gimme a break. :rolleyes: Very junior high schoolish.
 
applecruncher said:
The importance and significance of being/staying on someone’s “friend” list (on FB or anyplace else) is often waaaay over-rated.

“You did/said something I don’t like” or “You’re (quasi) friends with so-and-so therefore I’ll unfriend you”. Gimme a break. :rolleyes: Very junior high schoolish.
Click to expand...

The expression "it's the internet" applies here. I know at family gatherings politics are literally off the dinner table.

But never never ever worry about facebook. It's been a security risk for starters. Zuckerberg is a self absorbed pos pushing like a dealer personal life on the internet ie facebook. Facebook and all others should considered an option.

Facebook danger reminder

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hkxqPAVCO3k

And just like a boxer if one wants to spar in ring of opinion one has to be willing to take/accept a different opinion.
 
If someone is crushed because of being unfriended, then they've got some deep-seated issues. Ditto for the person who thinks they are getting back at someone by unfriending them. puhleeeze.......:rolleyes:
 
I contend that unfriending difficult and argumentative people can be the MATURE approach.. Rather than being dragged into silly and sophomoric disputes that don't matter a hill of beans in the greater scheme of things. It's sometimes the grownup thing to do.
 
Well stated, Falcon. :clap: It's pathetic.

There should be more important things in life than worrying about friends lists and ignore lists. Sheesh, indeed.
 
Hmmm, imaginary friends? I posit that real connection is not confined to offline. Many of have discovered to our chagrin that so called friends in the "real world," are sometimes not who they pretend to be. Conversely, some of us build lasting connections

with like minded people on the net. All connections are a risk. All genuine connections require effort on some level. Sadly, sometimes it is not possible to remain friends--in that case "unfriending" in some form or another is the best option, both on and offline.
 
In all my years on FB, I've "unfriended" one person, a cousin whom I'd not seen in over 50 years, whose views I just couldn't tolerate. I found I had nothing in common with this moron, and couldn't take anymore of his hate-filled diatribes. Good riddance. I don't need that garbage in my life.
 
Well, "friends", in real life, I have but few. In the "unreal'life", here, it seems I can be befriended. Clueless, either way. :playful:

imp
 
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Good for you, Bob. Some people feel that a person has to tolerate anything and everything from faaaaaaaamily. Uh, no. :mad: If someone is abusive, a user/con, hateful, always angry, well..... good riddance, lose my number, and don't even think about darkening my doorstep.
 
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I know people who's lives revolve arround their number of "Friends" they have on FB ..It all appears to me to be more like 3 rd grade school yard stuff, I have never been interested in joining FB ..Sure it sounds like it's good to catch up with old school / work buddies
 
Actually I don't "do" FaceBook, I was referring to someone on here who left in a huff. I know online is the virtual world, but just kind of weird watching someone unwind over a few days...and realize they aren't playing with a full deck.
 
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