Weighed in the balance and found wanting, (it happens to the best of us from time to time)

grahamg

grahamg

Old codger
Location
South of Manchester, UK
The words in the thread title were used by the man described as the greatest Britain of the twentieth century in a speech given before the outbreak of WWII, but it is probable each of us is found wanting in some respect or other during our lives, either by some significant other, or perhaps at times we may feel we haven't lived up to whatever we thought we should have done.

As a man you might think you're not so much of a man, and maybe you dont choose to assert how great you are all the time as others do, so that comes into it I think. At times we can probably see others making mistakes, maybe being too cynical or foolish perhaps, and feel at least wiser than they are then.

Its is hard nosed world no doubt, my father regularly telling his children, "Its every man for himself in this world" suggested it is so, and I doubt too many would disagree with him over that statement.

Quote:
"Thou art weighed in the balance and found wanting.

And do not suppose that this is the end. This is only the beginning of the reckoning."

Winston Churchill
October 5, 1938
Given in the House of Commons
 

Last edited:
Some research on thread topic or related subjects:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/in-the-face-adversity/201709/looking-yourself

Quote:
"The fourth area relates to how you feel about yourself. Do you give yourself credit for your accomplishments? How well do you take a compliment from others? Do you discount accomplishments or things that you should be pleased with and proud of? How good are you at feeling good about yourself?" (Break)

The last one has to do with being able to control your emotions, especially strong emotions; specifically, emotions that others or you yourself may label as negative anger. How good are you at controlling what you do and say when you're angry? Take some time and think about this. Think about a situation that you have been in when you lost your temper and think about the last time that you felt angry. What did you do? How did you deal with the strong emotion? Rate yourself.
  1. Bad at it, meaning that you let go of your anger in ways that probably damage the relationship that you have with other people or don't achieve the goals that you're trying to achieve.
  2. Not so good at it.
  3. Okay.
  4. Good at it.
  5. Very good at it, meaning that you can really be assertive in situations, speak up for yourself, and discharge your anger in ways that are productive and not destructive.

In the next post, we will spend some more time on asking you to look at yourself and evaluate the skills and the attitudes that you have that can help you be resilient and deal with adversity in your life."
 
Churchill was quoting a verse in the OT, Daniel 5:27. He probably used the King James version. I have no idea the context for Churchill's words.

If you read the full chapter you will see that it is a prophesy to Belshazzar, King of Babylon. The words were written on a wall in the palace by a disembodied hand and Belshazzar called for Daniel to translate and interpret them.

You can read the story here: Daniel 5 KJV - Belshazzar the king made a great feast - Bible Gateway
 
I wish you the best of luck in quest for awareness. There is no right or wrong time to pursue wisdom and I think that is. what you are looking for. I had similar inquiries about life and where I fit into the grand scheme of things. Bravo for you, every rabbit hole leads to something new and rewarding if you have time and patience.
 
grahamg said:
Thought so!
Tree fellin,
Wranglin a bear,
Fishin,
Buildin,
Swimmin in lakes(?):giggle:
Click to expand...
I think that would be a good man, he looks after his wife, his children and I am sure is an asset to his community. Don't pick at him or you will show your own stupidty.
 
Gary O' said:
Oh, he's not pickin'
Jus' flickin'
We're buds
Click to expand...
If you say so, I just don't like that attitude when it comes to good guys. If he was your bud he would know better, guess he is just showing that he does not think he measures up. He is totally capable of being a good guy, he just doesn't want to do it.
 
Blessed said:
If you say so, I just don't like that attitude when it comes to good guys. If he was your bud he would know better
Click to expand...

No worries
It takes considerable picks and flicks to get under this Irish skin

True, Grahammy is a bit weird
I sorta like that
We all come in all flavors

I consider him a bud
 
Gary O' said:
No worries
It takes considerable picks and flicks to get under this Irish skin
True, Grahammy is a bit weird
I sorta like that, We all come in all flavors, I consider him a bud
Click to expand...
Weird isn't the worst thing I've been called on a forum, or elsewhere, ("just a man who is yucky","bl**dy ugly", being two more worse!), and of course you know without any shadow of doubt you remain my forum hero, and will be so in future I'm sure, and I'd tell you if you it were not true!
I'm scratching my head a bit as to the reasons why disagreeing with a forum member, and sticking to my position causes offence, (I admit too I'm as fallible as anyone else when it comes to misconstruing others posts sometimes, but generally I don't bear grudges about things said on a forum like this(?)
 
Blessed said:
If you say so, I just don't like that attitude when it comes to good guys. If he was your bud he would know better, guess he is just showing that he does not think he measures up. He is totally capable of being a good guy, he just doesn't want to do it.
Click to expand...
Who says I'm not a good guy?
If I use self deprecation more than others, and occasionally say negative things when positivity might be better, then I am free to do so, but "good", overall yes I am! :)
 
Last edited:
Blessed said:
If you say so, I just don't like that attitude when it comes to good guys. If he was your bud he would know better, guess he is just showing that he does not think he measures up. He is totally capable of being a good guy, he just doesn't want to do it.
Click to expand...
It may be worth someone starting a thread about what might make a man into a "good man" (?).

Is it his countenance?

Maybe physical strength and handsomeness comes into it?

Maybe someone looked up to by other man for his achievements?

Maybe his wit and/or sense of humour?

Faithfulness, honour, and "moral fibre"?

(Then there is always, "meeting the needs of his lady"! :) ).

Blow me I missed out "loving", is your man loving, (could be more important than all the rest put together!).
 
Last edited:
Some research here:
https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a19535604/top-20-traits-she-wants/

And from another site this list of qualities concerning manhood appeared:

"
While certainly not exhaustive or comprehensive, this list is a compilation of many of the most important, widely practiced and culturally expected qualities of manhood according to cultural anthropologists, psychologists and sociologists who have studied the nature of manhood across diverse cultures and time.

  • Courage: A man does not shrink from a necessary challenge, regardless of risk. He will face danger, difficulty and self-denial when called upon for the sake of others.
  • Step Up: A man is the first one out of his seat (figuratively and literally) when a need arises. He’s a problem solver and takes initiative. Passivity is never manly.
  • Provide and Protect: A man has learned how and is willing to provide and care for a particular woman and their common children. He doesn’t skip out on this duty. Even if he never marries, he’s the kind of person who could do this and, in fact, provides for others in various ways. As anthropologist David Gilmore concludes, “A man produces more than he consumes,” and the community benefits from his work and generosity.
  • Self-Reliance: A man can stand on his own and not need to depend on others for his well-being. The Boy Scout Motto is “Be Prepared,” because the man doesn’t want to have to depend on the preparedness of another. He is not a loner though. He is willing to work with others.
  • Honesty and Moral Strength: A man does what is right and calls out others who do not. He deals with others in integrity. Temptation presents itself to every man, but the decisions and actions he takes in light of it significantly determines his manhood. He can be trusted to do what is right when no one is watching. He keeps his word and is dependable to others.
  • Tenacity: A man does not easily give up or shrink away in the face of challenge or adversity. He sticks with it and wants to overcome obstacles. “It can’t be done” doesn’t come to him easily.
  • Self-Control: A man is aware of the proper limits for himself – his strength, appetites, independence, language and power – and respects them. He calls others to do the same.
  • Under Authority: A man recognizes he is under the authority of another – be it a boss, his own father, his pastor – and acts accordingly. He is willing to respectfully challenge those in authority when conscience demands, but he is never simply a renegade.
  • Shows Respect: A good man shows respect to himself and those he meets, regardless of their station. He looks them in the eye. Gives another man a firm handshake. Offers words of respect such as “Yes sir/ma’am” or “Thank you, sir.” A man helps others feel valuable.
  • Loyalty: A man is loyal to his family, friends and others who are close to him, even at great price to himself.
  • Humility: A man esteems others as valuable and lifts them up. He does not praise himself. He understands the importance of and strength in apologizing and asking forgiveness when he has offended or let others down.
  • Compassion: This might seem a feminine quality, but a man sees the struggles of the weak and those in trouble and readily comes to their aid. This is a moral strength. A man doesn’t exploit an innocent person’s weakness.
  • He Lives His Character: Lastly, if manhood is a distinct set of character traits, the final quality is that he lives them out in action, and he does so conspicuously in the community."
 
Last edited:
Churchill had a few things to say about weighing up himself and others:

Quote:
"He has all the virtues I dislike and the none of the vices I admire"!

Quote:
"Men occasionally stumble over the truth but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as though nothing has happened"

Quote:
"We are the masters of unsaid words, but the slaves of those we let slip out"

Quote:
"The greatest lesson in life is to know even fools are right sometimes"
 
grahamg said:
It may be worth someone starting a thread about what might make a man into a "good man" (?).

Is it his countenance?

Maybe physical strength and handsomeness comes into it?

Maybe someone looked up to by other man for his achievements?

Maybe his wit and/or sense of humour?

Faithfulness, honour, and "moral fibre"?

(Then there is always, "meeting the needs of his lady"! :) ).

Blow me I missed out "loving", is your man loving, (could be more important than all the rest put together!).
Click to expand...
A good man, like a good woman, is kind to others. It shows in their words and most importantly, in their deeds. 'Others' includes other men, women, children and animals.
 
Gary O' said:
No argument there

Without love, every other attribute has zero value
Click to expand...
Maybe not zero value, (lest you're referring to a spouse), and then there's all the business of defining what the word "love" might mean, as famously referred to by a woman in the limelight becoming betrothed here forty years ago.
 
Warrigal said:
A good man, like a good woman, is kind to others. It shows in their words and most importantly, in their deeds. 'Others' includes other men, women, children and animals.
Click to expand...
Kind is important too, (I seem to remember it being said our selfishness is at the root of many marital troubles, and we don't tend to be very kind to a partner if we're behaving too selfishly do we).
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top