No need to apologize Holly, I for one appreciate that you let us know about what was going on with Jim.Seabreeze , @Matrix and everyone i"m sorry to have been the one to have imparted such sad news.., we can only hope he's not in pain, and being looked after very well.
I too hope they're taking good care of him and hope his family is visiting him in hospice.I don't happen to agree with that reasoning. That makes it sound like the surviving spouse died because they "didn't care about living anymore." More likely, they died because they were close in age, along with the health problems that come with age. Unless someone committed suicide, they died because it was their time.
Potentially,... but in Jims' particular circumstance, it was fact. He actually said it on several occasions that he wished he was still with his wife, and couldn't wait to join her. I feel he was not only unwell physically as she had been also, , but the depression that descended on him after she died was so bad, he lost the will to live...
I don't think you were carried away at all Catlady, a lot of people feel like you do, I was just expressing my personal thoughts on it. If I felt I was not going to be around anymore, I would consider giving my husband my password and having him log in to inform everyone that I passed on. In my case honestly, he might eventually grant my wish for that, but he would definitely be devastated and in mourning for a long time afterward and likely never get around to doing it.
My inlaws passed within three weeks of each other, they were both elderly and in very poor health. I agree that in many cases, depending on their health and state of mind when their spouse was living, they may very well lose the will to go on alone. Our physical health depends a great deal on our mental health also, one can have very negative effects on the other. They do 'die of a broken heart' to some degree, but physical condition has a lot to do with it in general.
I personally believe that "stress" is present in every illness and the stress of losing a loved one can have a tremendous impact on the human body. If you decide you don't want to go on without the loved one , that its also your time to move on and send "shut down" messages to your body, it can have the power to affect overall health.
This happens often. It’s shouldn’t seem surprising.
While you may not agree with the reasoning presented, it's a phenomenon I've observed, firsthand: My gmil died of a stroke after being married to my gfil for sixty years. He was in good health, active, and intelligent. Within three days of her passing, he manifested terrible symptoms that put him in the hospital. He became late four days later.
Beautiful and touching story of true love...passed it on to many! Thanks, Mike for sharing this. I appreciate it!
Isn't it nice to at least know someone cares?I agree with you Liberty. Although some of us enjoy an online 'family', we also want our privacy in times of mourning or poor health. I would want to be left alone and wouldn't appreciate anyone trying to research my personal information or call the authorities to check on me. Most folks have someone they are in contact with, even if just a neighbor. If someone felt vulnerable and needed someone here to stay in contact with toward the end of their life, or if in mourning, they could always make a mutual arrangement for that with another member here privately.
Thanks so much Holly for letting us know about Jim, so sorry to hear he is in hospice. He is a good person, and I'll miss seeing him here very much.
That's the way I feel Bea, If I am no longer posting here, just let me go. If I was capable and wanted to, I would go to the computer. I hope you're around for a long, long time Bea, I've always enjoyed your posts, humor and kindness.
