Why is everybody always picking on me?

hollydolly said:
perhaps it's time your daughter told her M-I-L where to get off instead of her Mother...
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That would be my choice to do but my daughter's MIL is a witch and a mean starting with a B. She doesn't care for my daughter at all and my SIL is always trying to please his mother to get attention. I only put up with the MIL to not cause any trouble. All she talks about is how she wishes her husband would die.
 
"I only put up with the MIL to not cause any trouble." - That's so you! From my time on this site, I've come to the conclusion that you are caring and sensitive. Your family members are perhaps taking you for granted and feel they can take their frustrations out on you, because you are the passive, peacekeeper, who will just tolerate it. I agree with others, you need to stand up for yourself, tell them that their treatment of you is unfair, and perhaps find a tranquil place to be for a while (in my opinion). You have my sincere sympathies. I "tolerated" decades like this. It didn't pay.
 
Sassycakes I am at a total loss over what some consider as just your dilemma. You're married to your lifemate for better or for worst, you birthed your daughter so the three of you need to commiserate and find a viable solution not only for your family disputes but how the three of you can assist each other in your ongoing health issues.
 
Are there any 3rd party”influencers “ outside the family that your daughter & husband respect? Clergy or other highly respected person? Someone who can let them know it isn’t at all fair or healthy for them or to you to take their irritability out on you?
or just pull them up short & tell them you’re not responsible for his pain or your DD’s MIL, and to at least stop taking to out on you if they won’t deal constructively with it themselves.
 
I always go way too deep into the "psychology of things", but my mother was always picked on as a little girl, then as an adult because she had low self-esteem. I went through the same thing as a kid and as a young adult until I learned to stand up for myself. I'm not saying this is your issue at all. Just explaining this as a reason some people are picked on. Bullies have an innate way of spotting those who are vulnerable and exploiting it.

As others have recommended, just stand up for yourself and give yourself some time to yourself so your husband and daughter can learn to appreciate you.
 
You May be correct dseag2:
My Mother always picked on me when I was growing up while my Dad defended me. My Mother lost my twin in her second month of pregnancy and I feel she always thought it was my fault. I .was very lucky to have an older sister who protected me when my Mother wanted to hit me. I was also very lucky to have a lot of wonderful friends
dseag2 said:
I always go way too deep into the "psychology of things", but my mother was always picked on as a little girl, then as an adult because she had low self-esteem. I went through the same thing as a kid and as a young adult until I learned to stand up for myself. I'm not saying this is your issue at all. Just explaining this as a reason some people are picked on. Bullies have an innate way of spotting those who are vulnerable and exploiting it.

As others have recommended, just stand up for yourself and give yourself some time to yourself so your husband and daughter can learn to appreciate you.
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