Why isn't life fair, and how does one cope with that?

Gaer said:
You are on a path to God through refined perception of the aliveness of nature and seeing the underlying beauty of everything.
This is a wonderful path. My path is devotion. There are so many ways to reach God.

I've been admonished many times for expounding my knowledge on the forum. These are not "claims", "theories" or "opinions". This is truth.

You asked a question and I answered it.
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Well, I am certainly not admonishing you or your posts, but to be fair, you didn't really answer what the question was. The question was, aside from feelings (Emotional experiences), how do you know it is truth? If it is knowledge, where did it come from? Just curious.
 

While we live and breathe everything is a matter of perspective and preparedness.
A day of decisions concerning common every day life began with a question this morning.
Do I grab the fly swatter or not? Then realized the fly is not lying on its back. Next

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bobcat48 said:
I'm not disagreeing with you here, as I have no way to verify those claims, however, I would certainly be interested in how you know it with certainty (Aside from feelings of course). I too have beliefs regarding energies, but I don't assert them as anything I know. It is just experiential conclusions. I am always interested in how other people know things though.
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I like that word choice, what i made bold. For myself when i have said that my NDE shifted certain 'beliefs' into 'knowledge' i mean it in that way, that i have reached certain experiential conclusions.

However, i never expect anyone else to accept my experiences as a basis for any conclusions on their part. Suspect some things best learned for ourselves, which may be why so many of us come back repeatedly.

When say i 'know' something regarding spirituality i mean it in the same sense as saying i know my limits and capabilities in this current persona--something i would not presume to know about anyone else or expect them to know about me, because even siblings raised in same household do not experience their childhoods identically, so how could we expect any other human to have that same knowledge of who we are?
 

bobcat48 said:
Well, I am certainly not admonishing you or your posts, but to be fair, you didn't really answer what the question was. The question was, aside from feelings (Emotional experiences), how do you know it is truth? If it is knowledge, where did it come from? Just curious.
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I know. I've answered this many times on many threads, only to be demeaned, mocked and ridiculed. I will not answer this here.
You would not believe me anyway.
This forum is not the place for this discussion. My words are given no worth here. This is explained fully in all my books. I hope you understand.
 

Why isn't life fair, and how does one cope with that?​


I wish my mother was here to answer this for you. It's not a question that I have asked since I was 10.

The answer is part of the process of maturing and if it has not been answered by this stage of life it may be too late. Anyway, her answer would not be received with grace so I will step aside now. :)
 
Gaer said:
I am not familiar with "Abrahamic scriptures". I have no religion.
If I did, it would probably be closer to the Vedic, or Sanskrit, but no.
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Abrahamic scriptures are those of Judaic, Christian and Islamic faiths as they have the same God, just call by different names, and have some differences in priorities articles of faith and tenets.

Between your talk of angels, and the phrase 'glory of God' which i heard often in Protestant churches in my childhood and is common among evangelical Christians i misunderstood you. No offense was meant, simply stating i am coming at it differently tho i subscribe to no religion either, while respecting the rights of others to their beliefs.

i've been heavily influenced by Buddist and Taoist writings, combined with what @bobcat48 referred to as experiential conclusions.
 
Gaer said:
I know. I've answered this many times on many threads, only to be demeaned, mocked and ridiculed. I will not answer this here.
You would not believe me anyway.
This forum is not the place for this discussion. My words are given no worth here. This is explained fully in all my books. I hope you understand.
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Just so you know, that was never the intent of my inquisitiveness. I completely respect your beliefs and also your preference to not share them here. I am certainly in no place to exercise any judgment in these matters. What I don't know could fill libraries, and probably half of what I think I know is wrong, so no worries. I apologize for being so nosy.
 
feywon said:
Abrahamic scriptures are those of Judaic, Christian and Islamic faiths as they have the same God, just call by different names, and have some differences in priorities articles of faith and tenets.

Between your talk of angels, and the phrase 'glory of God' which i heard often in Protestant churches in my childhood and is common among evangelical Christians i misunderstood you. No offense was meant, simply stating i am coming at it differently tho i subscribe to no religion either, while respecting the rights of others to their beliefs.

i've been heavily influenced by Buddist and Taoist writings, combined with what @bobcat48 referred to as experiential conclusions.
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"Glory of God": Sometimes the Angel's words spill over into my speech.

I don't refuse any expression of God from anywhere or anyone. I am delighted by it.
 
Gaer said:
With every thought, word and action, man produces waves of influence in the atmosphere.
Every moment of life produces an influences which rebounds back to you , even through thousands of years.
If a man is suffering now, it is from a result of his own action that he at one time spread suffering to others.
This was all explained and agreed prior to the birth on the earth, but we often don't remember.
Yet, the soul requests to be born again on the earth. Begs to born into suffering ,illness, deformities, pain. Why?
Each lifetime brings the possibility to bring one closer to the eternal bliss of God.
If one has experienced the glory of God even for a second, nothing else matters except to feel this again.
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Call it "Campus Earth". Our life is a test. Our death certificate is our diploma. Like the Monarch butterfly we struggle to break through the cocoon and fly. If we did live life without struggling our wings wouldn't become strong enough to support us. I think we are purged by both wealth and poverty. Don't expect to figure it out in only one material life or cradle to grave. It takes much more than that to connect the dots. Just love and enjoy and give thanks while you're here.
 
Liberty said:
Call it "Campus Earth". Our life is a test. Our death certificate is our diploma. Like the Monarch butterfly we struggle to break through the cocoon and fly. If we did live life without struggling our wings wouldn't become strong enough to support us. I think we are purged by both wealth and poverty. Don't expect to figure it out in only one material life or cradle to grave. It takes much more than that to connect the dots. Just love and enjoy and give thanks while you're here.
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This is quite poetic!
 
DebraMae said:
I am not a believer in Karma. Bad things happen to good people. Good things happen to bad people. Karma is a way some try to explain the inexplicable. There is a lot of "random" in life. We do the best we can.
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Yeah
' He maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.'
Matthew 5

Hmmmmm...karma

'Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.'
Galatians 6
 
bobcat48 said:
Why isn't life fair, and how does one cope with that?
It seems that our brain is always trying to make sense of what happens in life, and if we don't know the reasons, then many feel that someone or something must have a plan. No one likes feeling vulnerable. So how does one survive in this unpredictable and seemingly uncaring universe. How can one have any secure level of existence where anxiety isn’t always knocking at the door of your mind to remind you of possible things that could go wrong with your perfect plan?
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Life isn't fair or unfair; it just is. To dwell on what one sees as unfair does no good and won't change anything. Agonizing over it is a waste of time and energy. The way we cope day-to-day is to face it, deal with it, and do the best we can with what's been presented to us.
 
Gaer said:
GOOD! I'm glad you said that as it brought to my attention I will need a much more clear explanation of this in my new book!
Thank you! Once this is explained in full, you and everyone will understand!
All I ask now is that you keep an open mind and not bury yourself in institutions or belief systems that may not be right for your soul.
Thanks, @Jamala!
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I am glad you feel I have helped in some obscure way Gaer.
Contrary to what you’ve said about “keeping an open mind”… I have to emphatically say that has been my forte all of my life, instilled by my parents.

If you have read anything I’ve written recently you will have gleaned I have not “ buried myself in any institutions.” Far from it!

We all have our own “belief systems” I respect what you are saying but as far as I am concerned, this applies to you and those who wish to believe you.
I can only believe what I have learnt through personal experiences.

I know what is “right for my soul” and honestly do not need anyone to tell me.
I have read widely and studied many religions and have come to the conclusion that they all contain more than a grain of wisdom. So I respect them all …

However, you say you have no knowledge of the Abrahamic religions … well Gaer, I have learnt in my studies that in order to give a sophisticated answer to anything, one must be armed with knowledge of what exists from almost every source and this takes years of study.
Even after doing that, it is still difficult to be fully informed. So what I have done is, followed my heart, followed my head and formed my own religion.

So again, with respect Gaer, what you believe, is not what I believe, but that does not mean we cannot co-exist.
 
I've had a few female cats deliver litters. When the kittens got a lot bigger, I let them outside for the first time in their lives. They had never seen grass, but they acted like the grass was just part of nature. And soon they were romping around in the grass, and attacking each other. My point is we are creatures of this earth, we have no choice but to accept nature as it is. There are no guarantees from danger. We can come together to ease some of the chaos in our lives, but we can't eliminate it. We have to be like those kittens and accept nature, and enjoy it, knowing all too well there's chaos.
 
Bella said:
Life isn't fair or unfair; it just is. To dwell on what one sees as unfair does no good and won't change anything. Agonizing over it is a waste of time and energy. The way we cope day-to-day is to face it, deal with it, and do the best we can with what's been presented to us.
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And, hope everything works out.
 
feywon said:
One of my dearest cyber friends i''ve known for over 15 yrs and met on the same site where i met @OneEyedDiva, Eons. Extremely intelligent but also compassionate man. Despite our external differences we first bonded over shared values instilled by fathers who emphasized learning and thinking rationally.

He had a saying i adopted because it was how i've lived my life: 'Just because life isn't fair, doesn't mean we can't be fair to each other.' If more people took that to heart, life in general might become more fair. However, i learned early, thanks to my Dad that my thoughts, words and deeds are what i can control-- not anyone else's. Seemingly, i've influenced my children to take similar attitudes while striving to be fair to others.

The way i dealt with the fact that my life could and has been repeatedly changed in a moment by the unfair/unkind/assaultive words/deeds of others
is by not letting that change my values or behaviors. I choose to pay more attention to, to be grateful to those (especially when complete strangers) who have been fair/kind/helpful to me and to pay it forward every chance i get.

But let me be clear, while i prefer peaceful resolutions to difficulties i know for a fact i am capable of being forceful, violent even (tho i could count on my thumbs the times that was was necessary, that firm words weren't enough to back a bully down) in defense of myself or someone else who is particularly vulnerable (children, animals).

Oh, and as for making sense if it all---i don't try to do that anymore. I enjoy noticing the many patterns, some that hold from macrocosm to microcosm ('as above, so below') but i also know that our brains often impose interpretations, assign meanings to those patterns that may not be 'true'.

Understanding the dynamics of how light makes a rainbow or the celestial mechanics of the night sky is not necessary to enjoy the beauty (awe, wonder) of either. It is interesting to know those things, but not required for them to give us a pleasure in just witnessing/experiencing them. Ironically, i've often found such things easier to understand than the behavior of human beings. Often i grasp the psycho/social explanation s intellectually while finding them incomprehensible emotionally.
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Your father was a very wise man who taught you well. You are a testament to that! I can relate to your feelings about life and how to handle unfairness and unkind people because I feel the same as you. I also ditto what you said about peaceful resolutions being preferred but forcefulness forthcoming when necessary.
 
Liberty said:
Call it "Campus Earth". Our life is a test. Our death certificate is our diploma. Like the Monarch butterfly we struggle to break through the cocoon and fly. If we did live life without struggling our wings wouldn't become strong enough to support us. I think we are purged by both wealth and poverty. Don't expect to figure it out in only one material life or cradle to grave. It takes much more than that to connect the dots. Just love and enjoy and give thanks while you're here.
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That was so beautifully and simply stated. A Perfectly condensed message.
Thank you 🙏
 
Don't worry, be happy.

IMHO, this doesn't mean 'don't worry because nothing bad is going to happen'. It means some unwelcome events are going to happen but worrying about everything bad that could happen is harmful.
And 'be happy' doesn't mean 'force yourself to be happy', it just means keep leaning towards the happy side of things.
And it's a great reggae song.
For me it's easier to keep things simple. (I'm a fan of Occam's Razor).
 
My parents understood life wasn't fair but lived their lives anyway, and they had and saw a lot more tragedy than I have. They used to say life is what you make it. They didn't worry much about the other shoe dropping because it had dropped many times. People today have so much yet they are so fragile. Every little thing that happens is a potential disaster. No life isn't fair but you're here. Now what?
 
Judycat said:
People today have so much yet they are so fragile. Every little thing that happens is a potential disaster.
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True. However, what I think that too many people don't have these days is loving, dependable families/friends/communities like people used to which makes the hard times harder to bear. For instance unless you live in a really small old-fashioned town, they say most people are not only not friendly at all with their neighbors, they don't even know what their neighbors look like.
 
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