Winter Holiday problems comment.

chic

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U.S.
Due to factors outside of my control, I knew this Christmas was not going to be a normal family oriented one. BF and I had decided ahead of time, and we were content, as much as we could be, to spend the day quietly on our own. It worked out fine and I was so glad to get through the day with as little upset as possible.

Today someone started in with the Happy New Year stuff. Somebody kill me. I just got through Xmas and have to go through the same thing again with New Year before I've fully recovered from Xmas. Are winter holidays just the worst? I'm disgusted. How do you feel? Pls share. It might make us feel better.

cat fallen tree.jpg
 

I'm with you, @chic. As I get older I'm less and less keen on winter holidays. I hate New Year's in particular; I always have, even when I was younger and would go out with a date or, later, with my husband. It just seems like such a silly celebration to me, but everyone (in the States, at least) makes such a huge deal about it.
 
Mixed feelings here. Feelings that are held together by a delicate thread for years 14 now.
Last Christmas I managed to decorate for the first time in 13 years, and it was nice.
But this year, just didn't have the strength of heart and mind.
So DH and I spent time alone three straight days.
I baked cookies for two whole days - which was a disaster health/calories wise.

I too just try to get by without upset and thankfully, I did.
I forgive myself for not being perfect.
 
it's a HUGE deal in the Uk... particularly Scotland.. but enormous in the whole rest of the country as well..London is madness on New Years Eve

In Scotland New year is far more important than Christmas.. and they take a week in many places to celebrate..

being an expat Scot, after I moved to England it was so ingrained in me that NY was very special, I always felt that whatever happened I had to be out on New years eve celebrating somewhere .. and felt completely robbed if I had to stay home any year

Nowadays howver, I don't like the idea of parties, any more.. or celebrating in the streets with the massive thousands of people ...

I'm happy just to let it be another day.. a doorway into the next year !
 
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Between the election, Thanksgiving, Christmas and now New Year's, I am Done.

My neighbor came over Christmas Day evening with a small tin of cookies and a few pieces of homemade fudge. I can't remember the last time I had sweets, must have been several years ago, at least. I ate them all in one sitting and the next day woke up with a hangover. A sugar hangover. Never again but it sure was yummy!
 
You are not alone Chic. I just get through the Christmas / New year’s holidays – stay out of shopping malls as much as I can, cocoon myself and try and shut off the madness. It’s funny how after New Years, everything falls flat, the good will is gone, decorations are down, the world returns to a somewhat normal state again. For me, it’s just too long – 2 months of advertising, and persuading everyone they should be happy and give to this charity and give to that charity etc. I love January 2nd – its over. If they took away this holiday, I would not miss it in the least.
 
I sure never expected to make it to 2025! I'm as old as dirt. We didn't feel up to decorating for Xmas, but our son decided to make the dinner and it was so good. He heard that cooking the turkey upside down would help make the breast meat juicier.......and it worked!
 
This year it felt like all the holidays ran together starting with Halloween. Christmas stuff was out in the stores before Halloween was here. Since Oct. 31st, we had 4 holidays & 2 eves within 2 months. I agree with @astralcat about the advertising on TV that your bombarded with charities asking for money & how the Hallmark channels ran nothing but Christmas movies.

New Years Eve & Day I refuse to go anywhere or have company over. We stay at home by ourselves taking a break. We haven't stayed up until midnight for NY Eve for a long time. NY Day will just be a pork roast with kraut & mashed potatoes.
 
As you probably know by now, we don't celebrate Christmas. Just as well, because December was a sad month. My husband died on December 23rd six years ago. My DIL died on December 11th three years ago. My sister used to have my husband and I over for holiday dinners, including Christmas. After several years, it just felt weird to me, especially one year when my husband couldn't come. Everyone was exchanging these nice gifts and I wasn't involved in that, which they didn't expect I would be.

The next year I told my sister we would no longer be coming for Christmas dinners but would for New Years. She didn't like it but...oh well. A couple of years later my husband passed so she didn't expect it after that. Now she's no longer in a position to host those dinners and in a way, it's a relief. Those dinners were fabulous though. She and her children are all excellent cooks. I think my niece makes the best macaroni and cheese I've ever tasted and that's saying something since my mom (not my sister's mother) was a great cook and hers was delicious too.
 
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As you probably know by now, we don't celebrate Christmas. Just as well, because December was a sad month. My husband died on December 23rd six years ago. My DIL died on December 11th three years ago. My sister used to have my husband and I over for holiday dinners, including Christmas. After several years, it just felt weird to me, especially one year when my husband couldn't come. Everyone was exchanging these nice gifts and I wasn't involved in that, which they didn't expect I would be.

The next year I told my sister we would no longer be coming for Christmas dinners but would for New Years. She didn't like it but...oh well. A couple of years later my husband passed so she didn't expect it after that. Now she's no longer in a position to host those dinners and in a way, it's a relief. Those dinners were fabulous though. She and her children are all excellent cooks. I think my niece makes the best macaroni and cheese I've ever tasted and that's saying something since my mom (not my sister's mother) was a great cook and hers was delicious too.
I like you suffered the loss of my husband in December and his mother followed 8 days later. It was so much grief that I shut myself off from everyone and still do. The heartbreak was added to when my DIL lost her Dad suddenly to cancer on New Years eve just 3 years ago, Her mother faired no better, finally had a breakdown, had to be placed into care for six months last year for counseling and to recover her health. I was a Christmas maniac but it brings no joy now.
 
I do not celebrate either holiday. The"reason for the season" has left the room and now has become the 'season for no reason'. I instead continue through the month of December as if it were just another day/month.

I lost my father on 4 dec, my mother on 29 dec same year. Two funerals with me in charge in 3 weeks. Those deaths left me to be the one to see that my 2 younger brothers got through college. My one brother was in college (Navy) and did well on his own, but the last one needed a home as he was only a freshman.
My MIL who I cared for at our home (her wish) in nov 6 yrs later then 2 months after that, my older brother's wife was killed instantly when a snowplow driver cut her car in half; 4 yrs later my brother fell to the ground with a heart attack and died instantly. Those two left 2 boys who went to live with their mothers sister.

I didn't have time, money or energy to do anything during those years and I woke up one day and realized I was much happier with less worry and more joy to be me. Now everyday I live to my version of the fullest and could care less about buying some silly material item for someone who doesn't need it.

Give your time---it's much more valuable. Shelters love volunteers and so do the pets!
 
Perhaps it helps that I've always kept celebrating holidays manageable. "Going out" for NYE ended for me after 1980 at a literally standing room only event in a club. Since then I ventured out a time or two, but never stayed more than enough time to walk through and say a few "hellos" to those I knew. Once I had kids it just wasn't worth the logistical nightmare.

Over time it turned into a small at-home annual event, in rare years maybe going to see a few friends or having them over. Today we often settle for small "electronic" video or audio or even texting meet-ups.

Last year several of us tuned in to a streaming celebration online, three stand-up comics and a couple of musical acts. As that played we texted each other by phone. It was relaxed and entertaining and worked out fine.
 
As a child in the 1950's, it was a big deal in our household too and I was allowed to stay up to see the new year in. In later years, it was an excuse getting together with friends in someone's house and having a few bottles of cider. After getting married, we didn't really bother with the new year and our children, with the possible exception of younger daughter, don't bother with it now. A good night'd sleep is more important.

I've learned to love all the seasons, and being surrounded by farms, I can see the whole year coming and going. Now the Solstice has passed, I'm looking forward to spring and some sunshine.
 
Actively celebrating Christmas was important to me when there were small children around but now I’m content to watch from the sidelines.

I haven’t been out to celebrate a New Year’s Eve. since 1985.

The new year is a time for me to take stock of my situation.

On New Year’s Day I do a quick back of the envelope calculation of my expenses, assets, and tax liability.

Not very wild and exciting. 😉🤭😂
 
But, when you reach high numbers in years and
you are old enough to be a member of this lovely
place, then you live through whole years of "Holiday",
admittedly, without loads of food and presents to buy,
so why worry about a few days around the end of the
year?

If your perception of time is like mine, then a week flies
by as if it was only a day, or a day and a half, don't worry
about it.

Mike.
 
As you probably know by now, we don't celebrate Christmas. Just as well, because December was a sad month. My husband died on December 23rd six years ago. My DIL died on December 11th three years ago. My sister used to have my husband and I over for holiday dinners, including Christmas. After several years, it just felt weird to me, especially one year when my husband couldn't come. Everyone was exchanging these nice gifts and I wasn't involved in that, which they didn't expect I would be.

The next year I told my sister we would no longer be coming for Christmas dinners but would for New Years. She didn't like it but...oh well. A couple of years later my husband passed so she didn't expect it after that. Now she's no longer in a position to host those dinners and in a way, it's a relief. Those dinners were fabulous though. She and her children are all excellent cooks. I think my niece makes the best macaroni and cheese I've ever tasted and that's saying something since my mom (not my sister's mother) was a great cook and hers was delicious too.
I think part of the issue is the group gets smaller every year! You start out with two or three couples and little kids running around to keep up the happy chaos......then the kids get older and always look bored (so no more happy chaos feelings) and then one person passes on and the kids one by one quit coming because they have other family or friends to meet up with and then another person passes away....until you're sitting there with one other person and it's just too quiet and weird.

We'd quit doing Christmas for about ten years, no tree, no dinner, no friends because we were far from everyone but this year we were back with our daughter and her husband and a 7 month old and a 2.5 year old little whirlwind so it was a big improvement. You need the crowd and the kids, otherwise what's the point?
 
Actively celebrating Christmas was important to me when there were small children around but now I’m content to watch from the sidelines.

I haven’t been out to celebrate a New Year’s Eve. since 1985.

The new year is a time for me to take stock of my situation.

On New Year’s Day I do a quick back of the envelope calculation of my expenses, assets, and tax liability.

Not very wild and exciting. 😉🤭😂
And in bed by 10 no doubt, on New Years Eve? These days, I think that's the best way to celebrate New Year's Eve.
 


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