Would you put your children before your husband?

charry

charry

Well-known Member
Location
UK
Would you put your children before your Husband !!
 

Isn't that what almost all women who've had kids do? Then again, whether they've had kids or not, I think almost all men put material possessions (house, car) and "manly" activities (still being "able" to drive at an old age) before their wives.
 
officerripley said:
Isn't that what almost all women who've had kids do? Then again, whether they've had kids or not, I think almost all men put material possessions (house, car) and "manly" activities (still being "able" to drive at an old age) before their wives.
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I wouldn’t call that a very stable, loving , and respectful marriage then .........🥺...

My husband will always come before my children, as my sons would, I hope , put their wives and family before us......!
 

I'm not sure what you mean. First in line for cake, or....?

We married young. She always put herself first, so our marriage didn't last long, and four years later I was a single father of 3.
After the divorce, I dated, and I was in a few years-long relationships, but no woman's needs came before my kids' needs.

But are you talking about grown children? When my kids were grown enough to take care of themselves, I focused on myself. In fact, I recently (finally) married again. (We hit the 6-month mark this month. 🎉)

Now my wife comes first and my kids know it. And they're fine with it. They're very happy for me.
 
This is a fascinating discussion. Does this come up often - "choosing" one's spouse over a child, or the other way around? I can't actually think of a scenario where that's come into play in my family.

We put the person with the greatest need in first position. When one of our kids is in need, DH and I work with them to get their lives back on track. When my husband or I are ill or need some help, our children work together to help us out.

It's not a matter of putting their spouses second or first - their spouses are on board to help, too. And we are likewise committed to helping their spouses.

I don't honestly think my family is all that unusual in this regard...
 
I have 4 sons , 2 stepsons, and I can say , I have not had any support from them since my hubbys stroke+9 yrs ago, ..or before .......it’s jyst been him and me.......hope their consciences don’t get the better of them !!
 
charry said:
Oh god .......how sad !, 😢
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You know, now that I think about it, I think in at least some cases the reason that the wife cares more about the kids then her husband is that--again, around here anyway--the husbands seem to care more about their "success" (i.e., money, big fancy house, etc.) than her or even their own flesh-and-blood kids or grands, so it could be the women are reacting in defense to that. It's interesting: I've read lately about more than a few studies asking old men, including in Europe, Canada, the U.K., the U.S, Australia, NZ, what they were happiest about when it came to their lives and all but the U.S. guys mentioned families, friends; almost all of the U.S. guys said how much money they had made (or tried to) and if they could still drive or not. So I guess, in some parts of the U.S. anyway, money and machines matter the most to American men. That's sure been my experience anyway and I've lived in 3 different parts of the U.S., big city, suburban and rural.
 
It depends.
Seniors here usually only have grown children aka adults....
so on a sinking ship it's women and children first. Not adult children.

But if it's just about subjects less final, like decision making...
then your spouse comes first in most cases unless the spouse is challenged in some way.
 
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