End of the Womanly Woman

My mother was a strong and sweet person, she raise four of us at home while my father was at work every day. She wore a little bit of makeup on special occasions when she and my dad went out somewhere, but on a daily basis she dressed very plainly, when staying home and not out shopping or anything, she was in a house dress. She cooked, cleaned and made sure all of us were nicely dressed and instilled values such as being polite, respectful of others and considerate.

I don't have kids, but much like my mom, I am a womanly woman in my own ways. As a teen I did wear a lot of makeup, but as time went on, it became less and less. Now that I'm in my late 60s, I rarely wear it on a daily basis. Like my mom, I am not the typical woman, I camp, I do work indoors and out, and I shop when needed, not for the thrill. I don't worry too much about my clothing, I dress appropriately for my lifestyle, very casual, jeans, cargo pants, tee shirts, sweatshirts, etc.

My husband knows I'm very womanly, even though some may think of me as too manly. I agree that womanly women can be tough and very feminine all at the same time. I think these days there are womanly women out there, but times have changed since the 50s and 60s, and I think it's for the better. Kudos to all the good strong women of today, times are tougher, but in a different way. :cool:
 

SeaBreeze said:
My mother was a strong and sweet person, she raise four of us at home while my father was at work every day. She wore a little bit of makeup on special occasions when she and my dad went out somewhere, but on a daily basis she dressed very plainly, when staying home and not out shopping or anything, she was in a house dress. She cooked, cleaned and made sure all of us were nicely dressed and instilled values such as being polite, respectful of others and considerate.

I don't have kids, but much like my mom, I am a womanly woman in my own ways. As a teen I did wear a lot of makeup, but as time went on, it became less and less. Now that I'm in my late 60s, I rarely wear it on a daily basis. Like my mom, I am not the typical woman, I camp, I do work indoors and out, and I shop when needed, not for the thrill. I don't worry too much about my clothing, I dress appropriately for my lifestyle, very casual, jeans, cargo pants, tee shirts, sweatshirts, etc.

My husband knows I'm very womanly, even though some may think of me as too manly. I agree that womanly women can be tough and very feminine all at the same time. I think these days there are womanly women out there, but times have changed since the 50s and 60s, and I think it's for the better. Kudos to all the good strong women of today, times are tougher, but in a different way. :cool:
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that's always something that strikes me funny...if you are a strong woman you are considered manly. i'm not talking muscular strength. just strong in general.
 
I've been thinking about all this & wondering why I just can't look back at what some consider the "good old days when women were ladylike & men were manly" with any fondness at all and why most would consider me an angry feminist. Welp, I think it's because, except for a few childhood years when I used to wistfully watch the Donna Reed Show & Disney movies and wonder why my family wasn't like that & thought that everyone else's was. Then I started meeting more & more kids who reported on the cracks in those perfect family facades, cracks that usually led to divorce.

Then I started working after high school in offices. And when you're a lower-level (i.e., never supervised anybody) clerical employee, after the married men in the office found out I wouldn't flirt (because I knew they were, you know, married, sheeze), they mostly began to ignore me except when they needed me to type something. And anybody who's been in other kind of menial position like that can tell you: you become a piece of the furniture, they forget you're there and you wouldn't believe the stuff they'll talk about in front of you. So I heard these married men griping about their wives, bragging (even if it was phony bragging, it was still disrespectful to their wives, IMO) about their affairs, making fun of guys that were faithful to their wives ("talk about hen-pecked", "what a weirdo, it's not natural being faithful to just one woman, gimme a break"). And these were all kind of guys: blue-collar, "old-fashioned religious family men" (supposedly, ha), college-degreed executive types, academic, artistic types, etc. (If women knew how a lot of their husbands talk about them, yowzer.) So almost all of these guys were Dan Draper, Hugh Hefner types (or wannabes), in spite of how hard at least some of their wives must've been trying to stay pretty, cheerfull, keep a nice house & well behaved kids.

So that heartbreaking, useless in most cases stuff that those women were putting themselves through (and some still are) breaks my heart & p*sses me off because most of that how-nice-and-happy-it-was-back-then stuff is phony, fairytale, heartbreaking (if you buy into it) cr@p.
 

Mike said:
when I see women walking in front of me, I don't know
what they are thanks to the jeans and the trainers, they
all walk like men and from the back look like men.

There were some in the past who wouldn't believe that
I could cook, because they couldn't.

I like a woman to be feminine and ladylike, anything else
is not so nice.

Mike.
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I think if I was walking in front of you Mike with my jeans or cargo pants on, you'd know I was a woman. ;) My husband is a better chef than I am, and he often cooks for the both of us now that we're retired. I was a good cook, but don't compare to him. I don't think that women or men should be put into a box to 'act' or dress a certain way, after all, we are just people, more in common than different, in my opinion, not that bad. :)
 
gloria said:
Agree, there was so much pride in looking good. We did go out with rollers in our hair. :)
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I have to admit I was once dozy enough to say to an attractive young woman in a night club, "We should be judged by who we are inside, not by appearances".
Her reply was very direct and succinct, she said " How will you know when you first meet someone"? :)
No one can avoid being judged by their appearance, so don't be a fool like me, "you don't have to be a dating guru to accept or understand this", though appearance is more than clothes/fsshion, makeup and the rest, important as they are, but graceful movement, beaming, open smiles across your face and especially shown in the eyes, a nice voice, taking an interest in other people, etc., etc., etc.
 
MarciKS said:
that's always something that strikes me funny...if you are a strong woman you are considered manly. i'm not talking muscular strength. just strong in general.
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I was never like a bodybuilder, but I worked my entire life in physical male dominated blue collar union jobs, so I had to also be physically strong. My attitude was equal pay for equal work, regardless of gender, that was the only way to survive in that situation. Happy I did, I think I'm better off physically (and emotionally) now in my old age, than I would have been in an office job, etc.
 
SeaBreeze said:
I was never like a bodybuilder, but I worked my entire life in physical male dominated blue collar union jobs, so I had to also be physically strong. My attitude was equal pay for equal work, regardless of gender, that was the only way to survive in that situation. Happy I did, I think I'm better off physically (and emotionally) now in my old age, than I would have been in an office job, etc.
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I'm talking about mental and emotional strength. Being able to do things to take care of yourself like Gaer for example. She's feminine but she does her own stuff around the house. I used to be able to change my own tires and my own oil. My MIL couldn't even pump her own gas for God sake. I thought my FIL was gonna die when we took her to show her how to do it. She was so excited but he was outright annoyed that she could do something on her own. It's ok to be able to walk through this life in blue jeans and tshirts and be able to take care of our lives and our jobs and be tough and be strong. At the end of the day I'm still a woman and still go through all the same womanly crap except I think I can handle things better now than I used to. Most of the men I know want needy not ones that can take care of business and think for themselves.
 
SeaBreeze said:
I was never like a bodybuilder, but I worked my entire life in physical male dominated blue collar union jobs, so I had to also be physically strong. My attitude was equal pay for equal work, regardless of gender, that was the only way to survive in that situation. Happy I did, I think I'm better off physically (and emotionally) now in my old age, than I would have been in an office job, etc.
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"I think I'm better off physically (and emotionally) now in my old age, than I would have been in an office job, etc." I think so too; as you can tell from what I said above, most of the time working in an office s*cked (for females, of course).
 
Aunt Marg said:
What a beautiful picture of your mom, Gaer!

Wow, she looks like she could have been a movie star.

I embrace all that you mentioned, and it's exactly how I remember the days when I was growing up.

So much of what I see nowadays reflects... I don't care. The manner in which women dress, the way they carry themselves, their actions, their inability to properly manage and see to a home. Not at all indicative of how it should be IMO, regardless of equality, etc.
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DBM
 
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dobielvr said:
DBM
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I'll have a wild guess at it being something rude! :)

This thread, and its sister (or brother) thread about "Manly men" being scarece these days, puts me in mind of a UK tv presenter, and Sunday morning radio presenter/comedian, Don MacLean, (not the one US forum members will remember singing about "The Streak", being proud of his physique!).

When asked by anyone whether he was in touch with his " feminine side"(?), he stated "I don't have one, and whatever comes into my mind comes onto my tongue" as evidence this was the case.
 
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timoc said:
Not all of us treat ladies that way, personally, I prefer treating a lady like a lady, it's so much more enjoyable. :)
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If all ladies are treated like ladies, who knows, even those who are not ladies, might become ladies ;)
 
Pepper said:
I'm awfully sorry, but whiners complaining about days long gone (the "truth" of memory is highly debatable) being the ideal compared to the present and unknown future, well.......................I'm awfully sorry, but sounds like a bunch of indignant old farts clutching their pearls while more youthful people truly involved in building that future roll their eyes and avoid the lectures as much as possible. :rolleyes:

Yes, that was one sentence.

Once again, my sincere apologies.
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Apologise? You are bang on in your description imho. This sort of behaviour was noted in ancient times. Writings exist from Greece and Egypt created thousands of years ago complaining about the shortcomings of the younger generation. Not much has changed in that regard.
 
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I find slurs such as slutty and trampy applied to women who don’t fit someone’s rigid idea of appropriate female behaviour deeply offensive, no better than the homophobic comments that appear here from time to time. I am

feminine down to my toenails, but I am also comfortable in my own sensuality whatever form that may take. Frankly,
why should I subscribe to attitudes which have been used for centuries to control women, and basically prevent them from having the same rights over their lives and

bodies that men took for granted? I was a very pretty lady, and dressed like a French woman. This went over well while I was in Europe, but here, there were comments. Pffft. Did I show a lot of skin? Never, but I knew how to walk as if I owned the street. Thank you Madame Elodie, for all that you taught me.
 
Gaer said:
Well said! I'm alone too, but I don't date. What you are saying is perfectly understandable.
Maybe instead of asking, "Where are the REAL men," we should ask "Where are the QUALITY men?"
It would be different if we had a man we could really respect and honor. IMO.
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It's nice to know there are still people who appreciate decency. In spite of all this feminist stuff, women are not men, and we don't think the same way. Many men still want a sweet, feminine lady at their side, and many women want a man they can respect.
Sadly, few men respect themselves so there is little hope.
 
officerripley said:
I've been thinking about all this & wondering why I just can't look back at what some consider the "good old days when women were ladylike & men were manly" with any fondness at all and why most would consider me an angry feminist. Welp, I think it's because, except for a few childhood years when I used to wistfully watch the Donna Reed Show & Disney movies and wonder why my family wasn't like that & thought that everyone else's was. Then I started meeting more & more kids who reported on the cracks in those perfect family facades, cracks that usually led to divorce.

Then I started working after high school in offices. And when you're a lower-level (i.e., never supervised anybody) clerical employee, after the married men in the office found out I wouldn't flirt (because I knew they were, you know, married, sheeze), they mostly began to ignore me except when they needed me to type something. And anybody who's been in other kind of menial position like that can tell you: you become a piece of the furniture, they forget you're there and you wouldn't believe the stuff they'll talk about in front of you. So I heard these married men griping about their wives, bragging (even if it was phony bragging, it was still disrespectful to their wives, IMO) about their affairs, making fun of guys that were faithful to their wives ("talk about hen-pecked", "what a weirdo, it's not natural being faithful to just one woman, gimme a break"). And these were all kind of guys: blue-collar, "old-fashioned religious family men" (supposedly, ha), college-degreed executive types, academic, artistic types, etc. (If women knew how a lot of their husbands talk about them, yowzer.) So almost all of these guys were Dan Draper, Hugh Hefner types (or wannabes), in spite of how hard at least some of their wives must've been trying to stay pretty, cheerfull, keep a nice house & well behaved kids.

So that heartbreaking, useless in most cases stuff that those women were putting themselves through (and some still are) breaks my heart & p*sses me off because most of that how-nice-and-happy-it-was-back-then stuff is phony, fairytale, heartbreaking (if you buy into it) cr@p.
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QFT.
 
A woman will always be womanly as long as she has 'come hither' eyes, an alluring smile and ripe, 'come and kiss me' lips. I'll stop there I think, I don't want to spill my Ovaltine. :)
 
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