How long do you think you would have to know someone to marry them?

. This stems from another thread. A guy met a woman, and two days later, she was proposing marriage. Yeah, I know someone is going to say as soon as I saw her/him, they were the one true lover. That's never happened to me. Yeah, after two days sharing a bed, O.K. But after 2 days, sharing my wallet and my life, I dunno.
How long do you reasonably think you should know someone before marrying them?
 

Even a year can be too short a time. You need to be able to recognize "red flags" and not make excuses for them. Women in particular are often too eager to please during the courtship phase and many of us harbor a false belief that little faults will all become better after marriage when they usually just get worse.
 
How long do you think you would have to know someone to marry them?
After my 3rd divorce I came to the conclusion that jumping into a "living together" situation just wasn't advisable. My present wife and I dated for 3 years, maintained our separate homes until we married. Sure, we stayed over at each others house a lot, but maintaining independence I think was important, until we agreed to tie the knot.
 
1,000 years. :ROFLMAO: I have no intention of ever getting married again! Of course that's what I said before I married my second husband. :unsure:

I do believe in love at first sight. I also believe that marriage can change people. I've been heavy into The Love Boat recently and even though it's fiction, I marvel at how the passengers hook up and by the time the cruise is over, they're getting married. How do they know what a person is really about when they've lived miles away or even in another country and are from different backgrounds? What if they are abusive or have bad habits not revealed during the cruise. I love the happy endings but in real life, hasty marriages are a bad idea.
 
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It's not really how long, it's how well.
I'm in the at least semi-cohabit (spend nights or weekends at each other's places) camp. I don't plan on cohabiting or marrying again, but before i did i'd have list of things we'd have to talk about and there might be some 'understandings' i'd want in writing.
Before even dating much i'd bring up certain things because i have a clear idea of what my 'deal-breakers' are, i think everyone should, especially if they are actively 'looking' for a life partner.
 
Well, The initial attraction begins at first sight. That is important!
Ceege is right. What makes them angry? How do they behave when they get angry?
Intimacy: Is there an INCREDIBLE DESIRE to make love to him all the time? Is he tender? Is he gentle?
Does he just want to have sex or does he want to make love TO YOU? Are you SPECIAL to him?
Analyze the dynamic. Are you always apologizing to him? Are you afraid of displeasing him?
Does he have a beautiful soul? Is he spiritually evolved? Is he intelligent? Is he wise?

I once fell in deeply in love with the first kiss.
I once fell deeply in love when he quoted Jung in his first sentence to me. and the more I listened to him, the more intriguing he became.
haha! What was the question?
 
3 divorces? 4 marriages?
I looked for statistical tables, didn't spend a lot of effort- wasn't finding anything concise but here's some information:

Researchers estimate that 41 percent of all first marriages end in divorce.

60 percent of second marriages end in divorce.

73 percent of all third marriages end in divorce.

Marriage stats are like sex stats, people either deny or lie about it. I'm on my 4th marriage, finally got it right. ;)

When I was doing genealogy research I was surprised at how many 2nd, 3rd and even 4th marriages took place in the 19th century. I'm sure many were widowed by diseases that would be easily cured today. I can't help but wonder how many were victims of spousal homicide.
 
I fell in love with my husband the first minute I saw him, but since I was only 15yrs old at the time we dated until we got married when I turned 20yrs old.And we passed our 50yr mark.
When my dance partner told me that she wanted to pull out of all the training, dancing, choreographing and the long hours of practice. I was mortified. However, my dance instructor told me that he knew of a young lady in a similar predicament. He introduced us, she was seventeen and I was twenty-one. One year later we were Mr. & Mrs.

It came about when I suggested that we could save a lot of money if we shared a hotel room when travelling to compete in dance competitions. Her Dad was having none of it: "If you want to sleep with my daughter, you will marry her," he told me, in no uncertain terms. To his, and just about everyone else's surprise, that's exactly what we did.

Well at such a young age, she could only be pregnant, otherwise why contemplate marriage? Nine months went by, nothing happened, maybe it's a long gestation period. Seven years went by and the baby still hadn't popped out. We went from teenage, shotgun wedding to, "don't leave it too late," to start your family.

We are a family, my wife and I are a family of two. What her parents didn't know, nor did any of our relatives, we felt sure that children were not on our agenda. So instead of a honeymoon, I spent the time recovering from the swollen plums caused by a vasectomy.
So, here we are, fifty three years married, and after only knowing one another for less than a year. Funny old world isn't it?
 

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