Do you share your health issues with your children?

C50

C50

Senior Member
Location
Ohio, USA
I'm going to spare everyone the story and just ask for your feelings when it comes to your health issues and discussing with friends and family, and specifically adult children.

Personally I don't ever want others to feel sorry for me or in anyway alter their lives because of me. Other than making sure my estate is planned and both kids have copies of that paperwork I don't really share what is going on with me health wise.

How about the rest of you?
 

I only share what has to be shared. I don't want them to worry about things. If it is on the serious side, they need to be aware so if I need some help they are prepared. I had problems last year, a hip replacement. My son was all over it, he had watched my decline in that area for about a year. I think we were both relieved that the problem was found and we could fix it.
 
I share my health issue with my three adult kids. I do not give tons of detail just things that may change the way I live or limit me in any way. I don't want any sudden major change in my health to be a total surprise to my kids. I do spend time alone, in the field with my two sons from time to time, as we bird hunt and fish together. It is important they know what is going on in case something happens, and they have to deal with it.

Forewarned is being forearmed...
 
Yes, sometimes......they need to know, I think they can see the downhill decline, there have been a few times I've needed help with test or getting to the doctor, I usually send a text to all three (including one adult granddaughter) stating what's coming up and tell them to get together and decided which one can be available....works out pretty good.
 
C50 said:
I'm going to spare everyone the story and just ask for your feelings when it comes to your health issues and discussing with friends and family, and specifically adult children.

Personally I don't ever want others to feel sorry for me or in anyway alter their lives because of me. Other than making sure my estate is planned and both kids have copies of that paperwork I don't really share what is going on with me health wise.

How about the rest of you?
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Do I share my health issues with my daughter, grandkids, and great-grandsons? Well, they shared their Covid-19 with me, so I feel slightly entitled! But yes, I do tell my daughter so that she can dig out my living will, etc. Besides, other generations might want to know about anything that is potentially passed down genetically.
 
C50 said:
I'm going to spare everyone the story and just ask for your feelings when it comes to your health issues and discussing with friends and family, and specifically adult children.

Personally I don't ever want others to feel sorry for me or in anyway alter their lives because of me. Other than making sure my estate is planned and both kids have copies of that paperwork I don't really share what is going on with me health wise.

How about the rest of you?
Click to expand...
For me, I feel closer to people if there aren't secrets. At the same time, I understand what you say about not wanting to be a burden.
 
C50 said:
I'm going to spare everyone the story and just ask for your feelings when it comes to your health issues and discussing with friends and family, and specifically adult children.

Personally I don't ever want others to feel sorry for me or in anyway alter their lives because of me. Other than making sure my estate is planned and both kids have copies of that paperwork I don't really share what is going on with me health wise.

How about the rest of you?
Click to expand...
I think friends, and some family members, are on a different level than children when it comes to sharing health issues. You said, specifically adult children, so in that respect I would try to find a way to share in some way. The worst is to learn about health issues of those you love from a third party, who may or may not deliver all the facts accurately and may not have the best approach.
 
Patricia said:
For me, I feel closer to people if there aren't secrets. At the same time, I understand what you say about not wanting to be a burden. The correct answer to your question probably varies from person to person, depending on their particular relationships and circumstances.
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I’m close with all my kids, we get together as a family a lot so sharing what’s going on with me in all areas including health just evolves naturally.

I share specifics with my daughter, whether it’s an illness, results of a checkup, or some physical thing I’m dealing with.
 
Thanks for the responses. I guess this is one of those issues there's no simple answer to. I was kind of overwhelmed with care giving for my parents and even though I did it willingly or maybe out of obligation I must carry a bit of resentment because I find I don't want my kids to have to go thru that, so I tend to keep my issues to myself.
 
At this age if we should get something serious we will probably let them know what it is. Otherwise there is no need to let them know about something really minor like a cold.
 
We keep the family informed, and they do the same for their issues. A couple of years ago, I drove one of the Son-in-Laws to the hospital for his knee surgery, and we can count on them if we need to be taken in for some surgery, etc. We don't stress out over every little ache and pain, but if something major comes up, we can count on each other.
 

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