But does anyone want someone who is so self-obsessed? We all need someone who will give as well as take.
Here is a definition of people who are "self obsessed", or signs to look for, and you'll have to excuse me because if you believe the criteria liar fits me, plus a "lack of empathy", or quite a few of the other negative characteristics you're way off I'm afraid, (but why should you think you know would be a fair question anyway?):
https://www.bustle.com/articles/161804-11-signs-someone-might-be-self-obsessed-to-watch-out-for
Another take on it here:
https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/self-absorbed/
Quote:
"A self-absorbed person is someone who is only concerned about themselves and shows little interest in or care for others. As licensed marriage and family therapist,....., explains to mbg, these people "have a hard time with empathy and compassion for other people and other people's perspective, and they're much more focused on getting their own needs and wants met."
Break
"..........., a lot of qualities and behaviors of a narcissist will overlap with someone who is self-absorbed. For starters, Neo says, narcissists are very entitled, as are self-absorbed people. "You have to be pretty entitled to always want to bring everything back to you," she adds.
And even if a self-absorbed person may not qualify for the diagnosis of narcissist,......, says, they can still have narcissistic tendencies like manipulation, controlling, and a general lack of empathy or concern for others. Just as a square is a rectangle but a rectangle isn't a square, a narcissist is self-absorbed, but a self-absorbed person isn't necessarily a narcissist."
7 common signs to look out for:
1.They call all the shots.
One of the more obvious signs of self-absorption is when someone is always calling the shots. Whether it's where you're going for dinner or when you have s*x, ....., says this kind of person wants everything their way and will probably not appreciate your thoughts, ideas, or recommendations.
2.They make everything a competition.
Is this person always trying to one-up you? Or in some cases, "one-down" you? Neo explains that self-absorbed people always make everything a competition. They may brag about an accomplishment right after you shared your own exciting news, or in the case of "one-downing," she adds, "they'll want to compete with you about how they're suffering more when you're upset about something.
3.They use manipulation to get their way.
As ......., notes, things like emotional manipulation and controlling behavior are certainly signs someone is self-absorbed because someone who cares for the people in their life won't be constantly exhibiting those types of behaviors. This is where you want to look out for other signs of narcissism.
4.They always respond to your problems with toxic positivity.
There are some self-absorbed people who know what they
should say in certain situations, even if they don't really mean it. Keep an eye out for toxic positivity. ......., says, in those moments when someone says something that seems nice but isn't really helpful and is actually dismissing your concerns or problems.
5.They know how to mask their selfishness.
Similar to toxic positivity, there are other ways a self-absorbed person can "mask" their self-centeredness. According to Neo, a lot of people like this "tend to be able to pick up the right things to say or know to praise you." But once they've said the right things, she adds, they'll weasel in some competition or bring the conversation back to themselves.
6.They're always the center of attention.
Simply put, "They want to be the center of attention," ......., says—and they'll make it so. Neo echoes this, adding that a self-absorbed person knows how to tailor the conversation to them and can always bring it back to them. And when they're not the center of attention, she adds, they may appear visibly bored or uninterested with their body language.
7.Their openness might be charming at first.
Self-absorbed people can be very charming or interesting at first, ......, notes. "They can come across as emotionally intelligent initially," he explains, adding that because there's a lot of closed off people out there, it can be refreshing to hear someone talk openly about themselves. But you want to be mindful of this, he says, and pay attention to whether they show interest in you, too, by asking questions and simply listening.