Is spanking your child an effective way to discipline? Do you think it is ok at times?

LadyEmeraude

LadyEmeraude

You may call me EM šŸ˜Š
Pros and cons

Back in our day perhaps we did discipline differently than
now adays...
 

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There are no Pros. If you don't believe that, stand still while I hit you. No? Won't cooperate? Great way to teach a kid how to be a victim. Don't be surprised one day if the kid gets back at you and places you in the worst nursing home available. You reap what you sow.
 
When I was being raised by my parents as a young girl, one of several forms of discipline for wrong
doings or being smart mouthed etc., was getting the paddle stick to my bottom (two Wacks but not
hard) but hard enough I will say that it stung. This was from my father, not my mother. BUT I to this
day frown upon it ...
 

I was very seldom spanked at home which was good but when I got to parochial school I was hit more frequently and with greater force. Worse, I daily witnessed friends and classmates receive corporal punishment and this went on for years. It reminds me of medieval times when they put people in the stocks in the public square while others threw refuse at them. There's got to be a better way to discipline.
 
I could see a scenario getting smacked if, i.e., a kid was running into traffic, grab him/her & swat him/her from nervous intense anxiety, a spur of the moment reaction to something very dangerous. Not saying it's the best reaction, but certainly understandable in the circumstances. A planned spanking, however, is a whole different thing. I totally agree w/@Shalimar "big people use fear and pain in an attempt to control children."
 
People who are currently estranged from their children should think back to whether you spanked your kids or not.

I don't know if there is a connection but I wouldn't be surprised to hear there is.
 
I learned years later from my nephew that my sister was regularly spanking him for
wrong doings from the time he was 6 to about 8 years old. Yes, the paddle (wooden
one) same one we had as kids.) He told me he was brought to the basement and that
is where he got the swats to his bottom. Said it feared him and he has never forgotten
it. I myself have had no children, hopefully that would not have entered my discipline
of my child/children did I have them those years ago.
 
Big difference between a swat on the butt and a beating.
I was an abused child even from age ONE. As i got older he would force me to go into the bathroom and strip stark naked and then beat me bloody with a leather whip.

As an adult, i have intervened between a parent and a child who was punched in the face. But, i would not have done anything about a smack on the butt.
 
If spanking is no big deal, well, how about if you're caught speeding. And the cop whacked your butt with a paddle for every mile you went over the speed limit. Yup, on the side of the road, he "just patted your fanny". Suddenly spanking seems like a big deal.
BTW, my mom used to beat me with a broom. She did that often. Till I was about 12, and I just took the broom out of her hands, and broke it over my knee. I was not going to stand for that again. And for the last ten years of her life, I never spoke to her, and didn't attended her funeral,
 
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The problem with spanking or corporal punishment in general is not that it is sometimes potentially effective and useful but rather the majority of people that administered such punishment in such uncontrolled without oversight pre-modern eras were ANGRY or had agendas for inflicting pain on those they did not like. The psychology world during the 19th and early 20th centuries became dominated by those that rightfully argued several negative reasons why such was a net failure. It was frustratingly impossible for them to control those carrying out such acts so they instead decided to outlaw such practices generally. By impressing over many decades those arguments to university psychology students, it has become dogma for most psychologists that otherwise risk being ostracized by peers, losing their livelihood. The same strategy today is used to instill ideas into students in universities over range of controversial politically correct issues.

Their first argument was that it is inhuman and immoral for supposedly intelligent beings to inflict pain so, although they had had a difficult time convincing Christian religions because it directly conflicts with some Bible passages. That same guilt strategy is especially commonly used by anti capitol punishment advocates.

Personally this person believes spanking a child at some early ages has potential value if done so by those that carry out such without anger and pain. Many mammal species mothers do likewise as it is common sense. Usually just the threat to a child of being physically struck by a parent or adult is enough to elicit an effective response. Beyond early childhood years, spanking amounts to little more than beatings by angry adults. That is when corporal punishment has possible value. During earlier eras, there were ugly immoral sadistic agendas by many of those in prison systems and politically controlled courts. Until the late 60s, many of our police forces were dominated by those that regularly personally beat those they disliked or put them in cells with other prisoners they conspired with to do so. All that resulted in changes we see today. Unfortunately the pendulum has swung too far so today during this nascent telecom era, many miscreants are laughing at the rest of us. Of course ironically, among actual criminal organizations, administration of pain has always been the primary method of control.

I personally, would like to see levels of corporal punishment with effective oversight returned to our societies. Especially public application of public embarrassment and discomforts during incarceration.
 
David777 said:
Personally this person believes spanking a child at some early ages has potential value if done so by those that carry out such without anger and pain............... Usually just the threat to a child of being physically struck by a parent or adult is enough to elicit an effective response.............Beyond early childhood years..............That is when corporal punishment has possible value..............Unfortunately the pendulum has swung too far so today during this nascent telecom era, many miscreants are laughing at the rest of us. Of course ironically, among actual criminal organizations, administration of pain has always been the primary method of control.

I personally, would like to see levels of corporal punishment with effective oversight returned to our societies. Especially public application of public embarrassment and discomforts during incarceration.
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There is so much in this post I disagree with, I don't know where to begin. Since I have such a short attention span these days I find it difficult to use a lot of words. Suffice to say, it is overwhelmingly apparent to this person that you have no children.

The second is let the miscreants laugh as long as they are doing so behind bars.
 
My Dad finished 10th grade and dropped out. He was an iron worker. My Mom was a full time Mom with three boys. I am the middle one. I can remember being spanked on the butt and thighs when they missed. My Mom quit spanking me when I was about 8 and said "Wait till your Dad gets home". That was not a very pleasant wait. I was spanked with belt often, and sometimes a switch ( a branch off a tree ). I didn't go to Moms funeral or my Dads. I don't know why...I don't feel like I was damaged by them, but it certainly was not a deterrent for me.
 
I dislike the rigid, behavioural, Uber linear rat psychology approach to raising children. People are complex, children, in particular, are often very lateral. B.F. Skinner was responsible for some very twisted psychobabble, which, when slavishly followed, caused considerable damage. I

have often wondered what had happened in his life to make him so uncomfortable around emotion. His process does not address the later onset psychological problems so often experienced by people conditioned by this approach, particularly children. I mention this

because it speaks to the issue of spanking children. While the initial response may seem positive, the future cost may be very high.
 
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Pepper said:
There are no Pros. If you don't believe that, stand still while I hit you. No? Won't cooperate? Great way to teach a kid how to be a victim. Don't be surprised one day if the kid gets back at you and places you in the worst nursing home available. You reap what you sow.
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^^^^ Couldn't have said it better.
 
Paco Dennis said:
My Dad finished 10th grade and dropped out. He was an iron worker. My Mom was a full time Mom with three boys. I am the middle one. I can remember being spanked on the butt and thighs when they missed. My Mom quit spanking me when I was about 8 and said "Wait till your Dad gets home". That was not a very pleasant wait. I was spanked with belt often, and sometimes a switch ( a branch off a tree ). I didn't go to Moms funeral or my Dads. I don't know why...I don't feel like I was damaged by them, but it certainly was not a deterrent for me.
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I know why you didn't attend their funeral. Same reason I didn't attend my mom's. Neither did my sister.
Our mother was an abusive, raging witch.
I was too busy enjoying the relief & I had more important things to do - like run some errands.
Mount Sinai called me & asked where everyone was. I said, "My idiot brother (who was just like our mom) will be there. No one else will."
They had a pre-paid funeral. If they didn't, I would have told the funeral home, "Do whatever you want with her & don't bother sending me a bill."
Yes, we reap what we sow.
 

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