Same community forum, different choices

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Right Now

Senior Member
I liken this forum to viewing a small community with hundreds of residents in that community.

There are streets connecting different neighborhoods; some older, rougher neighborhoods, some tougher corners with a few scruffy fighters hang out, then more peaceful and quiet neighborhoods where neighbors wave to each other when cleaning flower beds or taking out the garbage. Wander to yet another neighborhood where younger folks attend baseball games and foot races.

In life, we gravitate to spaces where we feel comfortable, welcomed, and share experiences and difference of opinions without expecting others to bend to our will or agree consistently with us. The same should be felt here. One or two people do not have to start every acceptable thread here. We have choices. We shouldn't cower, stifle our thoughts at the risk of snarky remarks, and be made to feel like outcasts.

Many threads about a certain topic make visiting within our neighborhoods more amiable.
Your thoughts? Please share ideas to make this a better community as a whole.
 

Right Now said:
I liken this forum to viewing a small community with hundreds of residents in that community.

There are streets connecting different neighborhoods; some older, rougher neighborhoods, some tougher corners with a few scruffy fighters hang out, then more peaceful and quiet neighborhoods where neighbors wave to each other when cleaning flower beds or taking out the garbage. Wander to yet another neighborhood where younger folks attend baseball games and foot races.

In life, we gravitate to spaces where we feel comfortable, welcomed, and share experiences and difference of opinions without expecting others to bend to our will or agree consistently with us. The same should be felt here. One or two people do not have to start every acceptable thread here. We have choices. We shouldn't cower, stifle our thoughts at the risk of snarky remarks, and be made to feel like outcasts.

Many threads about a certain topic make visiting within our neighborhoods more amiable.
Your thoughts? Please share ideas to make this a better community as a whole.
Click to expand...
You left out the sewage and recycling plant.
 
I absolutely love this post! I've noticed that the "streets" have very different feels to them. I usually stick my nose into some to see if it's punched or not. If I'm bleeding, I don't wander in again. (Hehe Okay now, THAT was dramatic! hehe) But seriously, the underlying snark in some "neighbors" although there are attempts to cover it up is striking.

And Re: the threads... total agreement. I see no reason whatsoever that someone can't start a thread with the same topic that was started a year ago or even a few months ago... who wants to wade through a hundred pages of responses posted before they even joined to see if someone *may* have said the same thing?

It's also like a classroom, isn't it, @Right Now ? I was thinking about this a few days ago... self-appointed "Hall Monitors" (aka forum police), class clowns, mean girls, know-it-all's, kind and empathetic souls... well on and on it goes. Interesting to watch everything evolve.
 

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CallMeKate said:
I absolutely love this post! I've noticed that the "streets" have very different feels to them. I usually stick my nose into some to see if it's punched or not. If I'm bleeding, I don't wander in again. (Hehe Okay now, THAT was dramatic! hehe) But seriously, the underlying snark in some members although they try to cover it up is striking.

And Re: the threads... total agreement. I see no reason whatsoever that someone can't start a thread with the same topic that was started a year ago or even a few months ago... who wants to wade through a hundred pages of responses posted before they even joined to see if someone *may* have said the same thing?

It's also like a classroom, isn't it, @Right Now ? I was thinking about this a few days ago... self-appointed "Hall Monitors" (aka forum police), class clowns, mean girls, know-it-all's, kind and empathetic souls... well on and on it goes. Interesting to watch everything evolve.
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I have noticed that some few playground bullies seem to feel the need to run the whole playground, and woe if you happen to not agree. One would think people our age would have outgrown such pettiness.
 
Well, where do I start? A community to me means everyone has a turn at spinning the bottle. Since we are all different in our attitudes to life, lumping everyone together on one thread makes no sense.
Variety is the spice of life, threads can be positive or negative and those at the helm of threads call the shots, it seems.
I will always gravitate towards a positive thread since I greatly dislike making an effort to come in and then see the same people sitting on their pity pots time and time again, hour by hour....does nothing for my psyche.
 
Human beings are human beings with the same thoughts offline or online. The big difference (IMO anyway) is that being online and anonymous makes people braver. Sometimes they say things they would not say in person.

One of the reasons I joined this forum was to see what it would be like (at this stage of my life) to be around only seniors. The reason I wanted to know was because I'm exploring a move to some kind of independent senior living. It wouldn't be good to move in with only old folks like me and find out I can't stand it. :ROFLMAO: This has been a fascinating experience, mostly good, so I'm no longer concerned about that.

Nearly everyone here is very nice, sometimes outspoken, but using some kindness and care. I have encountered a few who I will just call the others. I try harder then.

I'm glad you started this thread, Right Now. I think there will be some very good ideas posted here.
 
CallMeKate said:
I absolutely love this post! I've noticed that the "streets" have very different feels to them. I usually stick my nose into some to see if it's punched or not. If I'm bleeding, I don't wander in again. (Hehe Okay now, THAT was dramatic! hehe) But seriously, the underlying snark in some "neighbors" although they try to cover it up is striking.

And Re: the threads... total agreement. I see no reason whatsoever that someone can't start a thread with the same topic that was started a year ago or even a few months ago... who wants to wade through a hundred pages of responses posted before they even joined to see if someone *may* have said the same thing?

It's also like a classroom, isn't it, @Right Now ? I was thinking about this a few days ago... self-appointed "Hall Monitors" (aka forum police), class clowns, mean girls, know-it-all's, kind and empathetic souls... well on and on it goes. Interesting to watch everything evolve.
Click to expand...
Yes, it is like a classroom. We can learn so much by being observant, and interacting when we have positive input, without having to wait , raise our hand to speak, and get called on. Thank you for your positive input @CallMeKate .
 
Jamala said:
Well, where do I start? A community to me means everyone has a turn at spinning the bottle. Since we are all different in our attitudes to life, lumping everyone together on one thread makes no sense.
Variety is the spice of life, threads can be positive or negative and those at the helm of threads call the shots, it seems.
I will always gravitate towards a positive thread since I greatly dislike making an effort to come in and then see the same people sitting on their pity pots time and time again, hour by hour....does nothing for my psyche.
Click to expand...
Yes, @Jamala, even you have a different way of looking at neighborhoods. Spinning the bottle is a favorite at parties! Nice comparison!
 
Myrtle said:
Human beings are human beings with the same thoughts offline or online. The big difference (IMO anyway) is that being online and anonymous makes people braver. Sometimes they say things they would not say in person.

One of the reasons I joined this forum was to see what it would be like (at this stage of my life) to be around only seniors. The reason I wanted to know was because I'm exploring a move to some kind of independent senior living. It wouldn't be good to move in with only old folks like me and find out I can't stand it. :ROFLMAO: This has been a fascinating experience, mostly good, so I'm no longer concerned about that.

Nearly everyone here is very nice, sometimes outspoken, but using some kindness and care. I have encountered a few who I will just call the others. I try harder then.

I'm glad you started this thread, Right Now. I think there will be some very good ideas posted here.
Click to expand...
I hope so, @Myrtle! I am open to new ways of accepting new perspectives.
 
Good post @Right Now !

I like your description of this place, it makes a lot of sense. I am still getting used to it, my first forum experience of this kind. What it lacks is the ability to actually meet folks face to face, but it has other advantages. Like time, you can read or post whenever you have time, that makes connecting with people much easier.
 
Social media platforms are analogous to schoolyards. You encounter whiners and complainers, nice kids who try to get along with everyone, bullies who think they own the yard, and those who bend over backwards to appease them so they don't get picked on or beaten up. Sometimes it's difficult to remember that this is an over-50 forum when people behave like self-indulgent children.

When someone has problems, I don't mind listening and helping if I can. That's what friends do. Everyone has their cross to bear. However, the constant negativity of some people is tiring. Commenting in a thread just to spoil others' fun is also something that certain people enjoy doing. People who take offense at the slightest disagreement because they must always be right are difficult to engage. Being open to others' opinions is good for one's own growth. Then there are the personal attacks that are unacceptable. A little more kindness and less judgment is a good thing.

By the time we reach our teens, we should have learned how to play nicely with others. Unfortunately, some people, regardless of age, have never learned. There's no way to stop these people except to refuse to play with them. It's no fun if you have to play by yourself.

Bella ✌️
 
Excellent response, @Bella. Another way of explaining and acknowledging why we should all be grown-ups, act accordingly, and also respond or....decline to participate in negative conversations. But then, people are all different, and on a forum it is strictly pot luck.

Thank you so much for sharing your views.💗
 
Alligatorob said:
Good post @Right Now !

I like your description of this place, it makes a lot of sense. I am still getting used to it, my first forum experience of this kind. What it lacks is the ability to actually meet folks face to face, but it has other advantages. Like time, you can read or post whenever you have time, that makes connecting with people much easier.
Click to expand...
I had almost given up on starting a Zoom meeting, as heated threads abounded and it turned me off.
Reading these responses, I am going to encourage our forum friends to join in the fun. You are right, we connect much better when we can see faces and hear voices. Perhaps Thursday? I will post when I am ready for invites.
 
I like fun and interesting current topics
I have many health problems and have discussed some and it was good to let off steam but I don't think I would call myself 'a moaning minnie'
For some people it helps to talk about it and it is good to find people who will listen and that is what SF is about.
We have a plethora of subjects on the go right now so we can always find something to read and have a laugh or help or get into a serious discussion.
Just my tuppence worth .....oh. and go see what Grandma did in Members Funny Pics.
You might laugh, you might not....:unsure:
That's okay too
 
Right Now said:
I liken this forum to viewing a small community with hundreds of residents in that community.

There are streets connecting different neighborhoods; some older, rougher neighborhoods, some tougher corners with a few scruffy fighters hang out, then more peaceful and quiet neighborhoods where neighbors wave to each other when cleaning flower beds or taking out the garbage. Wander to yet another neighborhood where younger folks attend baseball games and foot races.

In life, we gravitate to spaces where we feel comfortable, welcomed, and share experiences and difference of opinions without expecting others to bend to our will or agree consistently with us. The same should be felt here. One or two people do not have to start every acceptable thread here. We have choices. We shouldn't cower, stifle our thoughts at the risk of snarky remarks, and be made to feel like outcasts.

Many threads about a certain topic make visiting within our neighborhoods more amiable.
Your thoughts? Please share ideas to make this a better community as a whole.
Click to expand...
Brilliant!

My only recommendation is that we all try to stay relevant when it comes to current events and topics so we can converse with "younger" people (e.g. 50's) that choose to enter the forum. Many of us are from the Silent and Baby Boomer generations. The GenXers are rapidly becoming seniors, and it will be necessary for them to find a good home on SF as we have. We can't afford to sit back and say "it was much better then". We always like to reminisce, but we also need to accept and address the changes taking place in our world.
 
Right Now said:
I liken this forum to viewing a small community with hundreds of residents in that community.

There are streets connecting different neighborhoods; some older, rougher neighborhoods, some tougher corners with a few scruffy fighters hang out, then more peaceful and quiet neighborhoods where neighbors wave to each other when cleaning flower beds or taking out the garbage. Wander to yet another neighborhood where younger folks attend baseball games and foot races.

In life, we gravitate to spaces where we feel comfortable, welcomed, and share experiences and difference of opinions without expecting others to bend to our will or agree consistently with us. The same should be felt here. One or two people do not have to start every acceptable thread here. We have choices. We shouldn't cower, stifle our thoughts at the risk of snarky remarks, and be made to feel like outcasts.

Many threads about a certain topic make visiting within our neighborhoods more amiable.
Your thoughts? Please share ideas to make this a better community as a whole.
Click to expand...
That's a great way of putting it! :love:
CallMeKate said:
I absolutely love this post! I've noticed that the "streets" have very different feels to them. I usually stick my nose into some to see if it's punched or not. If I'm bleeding, I don't wander in again. (Hehe Okay now, THAT was dramatic! hehe) But seriously, the underlying snark in some "neighbors" although there are attempts to cover it up is striking.

And Re: the threads... total agreement. I see no reason whatsoever that someone can't start a thread with the same topic that was started a year ago or even a few months ago... who wants to wade through a hundred pages of responses posted before they even joined to see if someone *may* have said the same thing?

It's also like a classroom, isn't it, @Right Now ? I was thinking about this a few days ago... self-appointed "Hall Monitors" (aka forum police), class clowns, mean girls, know-it-all's, kind and empathetic souls... well on and on it goes. Interesting to watch everything evolve.
Click to expand...
I have my favorite sections/neighborhoods, like the Current News and Hot Topics. I mostly stay away from some sections like the Coronavirus neighborhood because I just can't. 🤣 I do try to poke my head into every section every now and then and just read what people are talking about, to see if I'm missing anything. :)(y) One good way I found to visit every section/neighborhood is to hit the new posts button. That shows new topics from every section. A nice short cut. That way I can pick what grabs my attention and read it. :) I read a lot more than I post. 😁
 
I like that you compared SF to visiting neighborhoods. Amazingly, I was on SF for about a year before I ventured past the Financial threads. I had my browser on Zoom in and didn't even see the categories below it until I adjusted that. But I mostly joined because of an invitation by someone who is no longer on the forum and stayed because I loved that people were not shy about discussing financial topics, even some that were personal.

I never thought I'd connect here like I did on the long defunct Eons, my first social networking site. But eventually I did and started feeling that is my new cyber home where I was making and have made friends. You said "We shouldn't cower, stifle our thoughts at the risk of snarky remarks, and be made to feel like outcasts." And you are absolutely right. I figure at my age, I've earned the right to say what I mean and I certainly mean what I say. That doesn't mean I can't consider someone else's point of view and learn something. And just because I don't agree with someone does not mean I don't like that person. Although I have encountered (very few) obnoxious and/or racist people here, some are gone now and the other two are on ignore so I don't have to read their nonsense.

All and all this has become a "town" where I feel comfortable exploring it's "neighborhoods" and the very interesting, fun, sometimes quirky people in them. I enjoy it here and have become addicted, just like I was on Eons.
 
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OneEyedDiva said:
I like that you compared SF to visiting neighborhoods. Amazingly, I was on SF for about a year before I ventured past the Financial threads. I had my browser on Zoom in and didn't even see the other categories until I adjusted that. But I mostly joined because of an invitation, by someone who is no longer on the forum and stayed because I loved that people were not shy about discussing financial topics, even some that were personal.

I never thought I'd connect here like I did on the long defunct Eons, my first social networking site. But eventually I did and started feeling that is was my new cyber home where I was making and have made friends. You said "We shouldn't cower, stifle our thoughts at the risk of snarky remarks, and be made to feel like outcasts." And you are absolutely right. I figure at my age, I've earned the right to say what I mean and I certainly mean what I say. That doesn't mean I can't consider someone else's point of view and learn something. And just because I don't agree with someone does not mean I don't like that person. Although I have encountered (very few) obnoxious and/or racist people here. Some are gone now the other two are on ignore so I don't have to read their nonsense.

All and all this has become a "town" where I feel comfortable exploring it's "neighborhoods" and the very interesting, fun, sometimes quirky people in them. I enjoy it here and have become addicted, just like I was on Eons.
Click to expand...
Wait, there's a financial section here? :) I didn't even realize that. 😁
 
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