I'm becoming a misanthrope

R

Rose65

Well-known Member
Location
United Kingdom
How do I deal with this process? As time goes on, I am less and less impressed with human behaviour, less inclined to trust anyone and I increasingly value solitude.

The way people behaved throughout the pandemic especially influenced and appalled me. It brought out the worst in so many. That experience has changed me forever, all the panic and fear, especially caused by the media. I switch the news on now and never see anything good or useful.The TV schedule is full of stupid noisy people, it's hard to find anything edifying. So reading books is my best bet.

The word misanthrope increasingly seems appropriate to describe me. I can only tolerate my husband and my dog these days, I don't like socialising like I did. Is it ok and healthy to be like this or is it just part of aging?
 

Rose65 said:
How do I deal with this process? As time goes on, I am less and less impressed with human behaviour, less inclined to trust anyone and I increasingly value solitude.

The way people behaved throughout the pandemic especially influenced and appalled me. It brought out the worst in so many. That experience has changed me forever, all the panic and fear, especially caused by the media. I switch the news on now and never see anything good or useful.The TV schedule is full of stupid noisy people, it's hard to find anything edifying. So reading books is my best bet.

The word misanthrope increasingly seems appropriate to describe me. I can only tolerate my husband and my dog these days, I don't like socialising like I did. Is it ok and healthy to be like this or is it just part of aging?
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As long as you don't harm anyone else, it's fine.
My daughter is more misanthropic than i am because her job puts her in 6 day a week contact with rude, unthinking people much more than sensible, kind people. But then both of us have always valued our solitude. We make sure to respect each other's need for it even tho we live together.
 
While i've rarely enjoyed being in crowded places (a couple of concerts while in Hawaii did i even feel 'comfortable' at), i also try to remember that someone being pushy or rude may be having an bad day. Eventually i learned to give myself the same consideration. Some days i only leave our place to take DD to work and check the mail.

This is one of the best reminders of seen of the frequently quoted these days line, "You never know what someone else may be going thru."

what we don't see.jpg
 
Rose65 said:
How do I deal with this process? As time goes on, I am less and less impressed with human behaviour, less inclined to trust anyone and I increasingly value solitude.

The way people behaved throughout the pandemic especially influenced and appalled me. It brought out the worst in so many. That experience has changed me forever, all the panic and fear, especially caused by the media. I switch the news on now and never see anything good or useful.The TV schedule is full of stupid noisy people, it's hard to find anything edifying. So reading books is my best bet.

The word misanthrope increasingly seems appropriate to describe me. I can only tolerate my husband and my dog these days, I don't like socialising like I did. Is it ok and healthy to be like this or is it just part of aging?
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I think I'm more so as I get older. It's partly because I worked in the public, in sales, for thirty years.
I don't want to talk to people anymore. I don't want to impress people, I don't want to persuade people.
I just want to be with people if I want to. Is this wrong? 😁
 
Rose65 said:
As time goes on, I am less and less impressed with human behaviour
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There is so much good happening in the world, but we mostly hear about the bad.

I totally agree with you that the behavior of people during the pandemic was shocking compared to how we always had learned in history about how in times of trouble people stepped up to work together. When I sold my house I had a prejudice against my neighbor's offer because of his callous attitude about covid just killing old people - as if old people didn't matter. So when his offer tied with another, I went with the stranger (tho also because that was a cash offer with no inspection required).

Personally I only regularly check the bland news websites like the BBC. I had my old computer's homepage set to a good-news type website, I should probably do that again, or at least make a habit to glance at one.

The Good News Network: Positive Stories 24/7
 
HoneyNut said:
There is so much good happening in the world, but we mostly hear about the bad.

I totally agree with you that the behavior of people during the pandemic was shocking compared to how we always had learned in history about how in times of trouble people stepped up to work together. When I sold my house I had a prejudice against my neighbor's offer because of his callous attitude about covid just killing old people - as if old people didn't matter. So when his offer tied with another, I went with the stranger (tho also because that was a cash offer with no inspection required).

Personally I only regularly check the bland news websites like the BBC. I had my old computer's homepage set to a good-news type website, I should probably do that again, or at least make a habit to glance at one.

The Good News Network: Positive Stories 24/7
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@HoneyNut , thanks for mentioning that good news site. I had forgotten about it. It's really nice! 🌹
 
I’ve been like this for a long time and only broke free mainly for my husbands sake since he wanted to retire out east. I did the inviting the neighbours over for dinner chit but so glad that was short lived. Some people will walk all over you if you let them.

People suck. I’ve never been a huge people fan but since the pandemic and learning about global warming and what we’ve done to our planet and all the other 82% of species we had shared it with but killed off due to our greed and selfishness, I’m even less of a fan.

In a way I’m glad I’m going soon. This isn’t the world I remember and I’m glad I never had children or grandchildren who have to live through whatever future it holds.

Bah. Humbug. 😂 I even sound like an old bitter woman. 😅
 
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hearlady said:
I think I'm more so as I get older. It's partly because I worked in the public, in sales, for thirty years.
I don't want to talk to people anymore. I don't want to impress people, I don't want to persuade people.
I just want to be with people if I want to. Is this wrong? 😁
Click to expand...

No, it's not wrong --small talk may 'grease the wheels of civilization', but there's no meat in it, just empty words.
 
PeppermintPatty said:
People suck. I’ve never been a huge people fan but since the pandemic and learning about global warming and what we’ve done to our planet and all the other 82% of species we had shared it with but killed off due to our greed and selfishness.

In a way I’m glad I’m going soon. This isn’t the world I remember and I’m glad I never had children or grandchildren who have to live through whatever future it holds.

Bah. Humbug. 😂 I even sound like an old bitter woman. 😅
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Exactly how I feel.
 
for me all the signs are "we've messed up really really badly and it's gonna take hard work ; determination and goodwill to fix" - and if they won't listen to us oldies then they're beggard! Nah been peering hard but can't see a bright future so glad to leave on the glory train soon!
 
Rose65 said:
I don't actually 'hate'. I just find nothing much to like these days in people. I'm annoyed and irritated by stupidity and selfishness which abounds.
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I see it most everyday. People have become more selfish than they were before. Too many people think they are entitled. It doesn’t matter if it’s running a light or a stop sign, or going 90 mph on the freeway. Too many people have the belief that they are entitled to do as they please or get away with whatever they can. There is no respect for the law or other people’s rights.

I have seen people be so disrespectful of others, it makes me ill at times. I live in kind of an upscale neighborhood. About 2 weeks ago, I was walking behind 3 boys (about 15) who were about 30 feet in front of me. There was a small boy about 6 or 7 playing with his cars on the sidewalk. Instead of the 3 boys walking around the little boy, they walked right over top of his cars, stepping on them and breaking some.

I yelled at them and they looked at me and laughed. I thought to myself about what I would like to do to them, but didn’t say anything. I helped the little boy pick up his toys and broken pieces and placed them in the box he had. I reached in my pocket and took out a $5 bill and handed it to him and told him to tell his parents the money is to pay for the broken cars the other boys stepped on.

A lady in the yard saw me do that and told me I should have made the boy’s parents pay for the broken cars. I didn’t know those kids from Adam, so I did what I thought was right and to teach the little boy that not everyone in this world is a jerk.
 
Rose65 said:
I don't actually 'hate'. I just find nothing much to like these days in people. I'm annoyed and irritated by stupidity and selfishness which abounds.
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When something or someone irritates or bothers me my mood gets dark. I look for scapegoats to direct my frustration and anger at.

There is a lot of that to go around. When I am in those moods, I don't enjoy very much. I think I know what you mean and agree. :)
 

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