I'm in a pickle....

Colleen said:
My husband passed away quite suddenly on 10/13. I will not be receiving his pension (that's another story) so my income will be drastically reduced each month. I will need to sell our home (we have a mortgage) and find an apartment.

My immediate concern (among many) is how to get rid of a lease on the truck we just got in March (it has 880 miles on it). I went to the dealer and was told it has a small amount of equity ($2000) so they don't want it back. I need a smaller vehicle and a smaller payment. I tried to trade the truck for a new car SUV lease but they brushed me off.

I know that dealers buy back leases and that you don't have to go to the dealer you originally got the vehicle. It was really upsetting for me, especially after the shock of losing my husband, because of the way I was treated after we had dealt with them for many years and purchased/leased 8 other vehicles from them over the years.

I'm hoping for some advice to help me deal with this.
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That's horrible. Especially considering how many vehicles you've bought from them.

When I needed to get rid of a van I'd recently bought and could no longer pay for, I asked the dealership for a "relinquishment form." I specifically said I needed to relinquish the van, and they gave me that form. I filled it out that night, and gave them the form and the keys the next morning.

They auctioned off the van, and I was on the hook for a discrepancy balance of $9K, but I didn't pay it. Not one payment. They called every month to ask if I could make a payment, and I always said no, and after about 6 months, they stopped calling.

If you formally relinquish your vehicle and then sell your house, that dealership could probably take the discrepancy balance or a percentage of it from the profit of the sale, if they apply for it or are notified during escrow. That'd be the only downside.
 

Lara said:
My heart sank when I read your husband "Suddenly Past". Mine did too. You can do this Colleen. You're going to be very busy and look at that as a blessing because it will keep your mind moving forward outside of your pain of loss.

SF is a great place but there are also online forums & real-life groups of widows and widowers at churches and elsewhere in the community that are there to help and to offer advise and direction as well. You may make some new supportive friends in the meantime.

It will seem overwhelming but make a list of to-do's and tell yourself to take one at a time. Just do what you can. Some important things will slip through the cracks or miss deadlines (focus on your progress) but life went on for me and my 4 young children (2-8) and we're all alive and very well today, 36 years later.

I don't know a thing about Go Fund Me but it sounds like you may qualify(?). Make a list of your needs including that your husband died suddenly and pension unavailable now...can't afford lease payments on truck (can you meet with someone higher up than manager?), have to move out of house to apartment, and all the "in-a-pickle" items you haven't mentioned here. Just a wild idea but you never know.
@Colleen
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God Bless you :) I appreciate your encouragement. I'll make it through this with the Grace of God and some very wonderful neighbors. They have been feeding me all week and I've had to put a lot of it in the freezer. We only lived in this house for 1 1/2 years when we moved from AZ but the community has been so caring. I even got a beautiful floral arrangement at the house from the company that trimmed and cut down a tree for us last summer. I'm sure the truck situation will get resolved. It's just stressful in the meantime.
 
Murrmurr said:
That's horrible. Especially considering how many vehicles you've bought from them.

When I needed to get rid of a van I'd recently bought and could no longer pay for, I asked the dealership for a "relinquishment form." I specifically said I needed to relinquish the van, and they gave me that form. I filled it out that night, and gave them the form and the keys the next morning.

They auctioned off the van, and I was on the hook for a discrepancy balance of $9K, but I didn't pay it. Not one payment. They called every month to ask if I could make a payment, and I always said no, and after about 6 months, they stopped calling.

If you formally relinquish your vehicle and then sell your house, that dealership could probably take the discrepancy balance or a percentage of it from the profit of the sale, if they apply for it or are notified during escrow. That'd be the only downside.
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Didn't your credit take a hit?? I've worked too hard all these years to not get to the delinquent stage. Hopefully, the dealership (and talking to someone else) will help me and they'll do right thing. It's not like I'm not going to buy/lease another car. I just need a smaller one and a smaller payment.
 
Colleen said:
Didn't your credit take a hit?? I've worked too hard all these years to get to the delinquent stage. Hopefully, the dealership (and talking to someone else) will help me and do the right thing. It's not like I'm not going to buy/lease another car. I just need a smaller one and a smaller payment.
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Only a tiny ding, not significant at all. Could be because I had excellent credit, or could be because I did this during the pandemic, but probably the former.

But like I just posted; It'd be cool if you found someone willing to take over the payments for ownership...if the dealer won't work with you.
 
When my husband died, many years ago now, there was still a small amount owing to the bank when he got a loan to buy the car. I informed the pensions office that the bank was coming after me for the money and they said, "You are not responsible for the bills incurred in his name only". The bank couldn't come after me in the end. So sorry for your loss Colleen. 💘
 
Colleen said:
God Bless you :) I appreciate your encouragement. I'll make it through this with the Grace of God and some very wonderful neighbors. They have been feeding me all week and I've had to put a lot of it in the freezer. We only lived in this house for 1 1/2 years when we moved from AZ but the community has been so caring. I even got a beautiful floral arrangement at the house from the company that trimmed and cut down a tree for us last summer. I'm sure the truck situation will get resolved. It's just stressful in the meantime.
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You are blessed to have such good neighbors. We have lost so many on my small street, only 12 houses, and most just barely acknowledge the loss, if at all. Remember to take good care of yourself!
 
My heartfelt condolences to you Colleen.
It's possible there may be a local TV news station that does interventions in your area.
In my area it's called 7 On Your Side.
They listen to your story, and contact the Dealer or vendor to get the problem resolved, and then they report what response they got back from the dealership. Even if the dealership still refuses to cooperate, they are going to get bad press, and they hate that because they spend so much money trying to win favor and trust with the public. If they find out the name of their dealership is gonna be on the news, and it's gonna paint them in a way that they don't care about their customers hardships, they would be a fool to let that happen. Maybe worth a check.
 
I am so sorry for your loss, @Colleen ! I remember a while back when you were planning your trip to PA. I hope all goes well with you with all that you are going through! I'm glad you have good neighbors. Like others here said, stay busy. That helped me when I lost my husband.

If you haven't done so already, get copies of his death certificate. I needed to use them often. If you have them, take one with you to the dealership.

 
Sorry for your loss @Colleen, my deepest sympathy and condolence.

Haven't a car since 2011 and it was a second hand car paid right out. So, I don't know to help with rentals. Sorry!

I know of the financial loss and not getting pensions in time to help. I get by with my two jobs, one currently not paying out anything as I haven't published any writing work since hubby died last year.

So, I've rearranged my budget and even though it's tight, I manage. I'll be glad to get to retirement age to get pensions but it's another 3 years or so.

I'd recommend like others above to get financial advice services. Good luck!
 
Brookswood said:
Who owns the lease? The dealer or a bank? Often banks own the lease.
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I was told I needed to change the title since it's in both our names, so I went to the DMV and they wanted the title. DUH! I realized, since the truck is only 6 months old and leased, I wouldn't have the title. I went back home and contacted Nissan Finance and asked them if I needed to have the title changed. They said no. The truck is owned by Nissan and we are the secondary owners, so no changes needed.
 
Colleen said:
I was told I needed to change the title since it's in both our names, so I went to the DMV and they wanted the title. DUH! I realized, since the truck is only 6 months old and leased, I wouldn't have the title. I went back home and contacted Nissan Finance and asked them if I needed to have the title changed. They said no. The truck is owned by Nissan and we are the secondary owners, so no changes needed.
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You're making progress. Hang in there!
 
Colleen said:
I was told I needed to change the title since it's in both our names, so I went to the DMV and they wanted the title. DUH! I realized, since the truck is only 6 months old and leased, I wouldn't have the title. I went back home and contacted Nissan Finance and asked them if I needed to have the title changed. They said no. The truck is owned by Nissan and we are the secondary owners, so no changes needed.
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So now what? How do you get out of lease if title does not need to be changed.
 

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