Cremation or burial ? What is your choice ?

Been There said:
Burial in Arlington. I have requested to be dressed in my uniform that I have marked in a bag. No notice in newspapers and no funeral, except graveside service with a Navy or Marine Chaplin performing a short service. The only outside attendee that will be permitted to attend is my niece.
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You dislike all the rest of them?
 

OldOld said:
You dislike all the rest of them?
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My parents were killed when I was 9. The family argued who was going to take the kid. My dad’s brothers wanted to dump me in an orphanage. My Gramps said ‘Hell no. We will take him.” My grandparents raised me. My niece is really my cousin. I don’t have any nieces.
We have been very close for years. She has always been my rock.

It’s a long story I don’t care repeating.
 
I choose cremation. ⚱️💐 I don't want my son spending extra money holding a wake/funeral for my empty body. I talk about me leaving with him now. It's like saying goodbye in advance. We often say I love you to each other. When I do die, he won't feel in a desperation to say goodbye or to cling to my decaying body. He's fully aware of my faith and where I know my spirit will be. I want him to use a minimum of funds to dispose of my remains. Whatever funds are left, I want him to use on himself.
 
MarkD said:
No but my old wish was to be backpacked up in pieces of wolves or some other hungry critter. But I know we are way too toxic to do any creature any good. Probably will be incinerated though. Don't want to be a big problem.
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Speak for yourself. 😂
 
Ive made arrangements to be buried where it wouldn't cost family anything. Dad was buried. Mom was cremated. Her ashes are in the man cave.
 
Been There said:
My parents were killed when I was 9. The family argued who was going to take the kid. My dad’s brothers wanted to dump me in an orphanage. My Gramps said ‘Hell no. We will take him.” My grandparents raised me. My niece is really my cousin. I don’t have any nieces.
We have been very close for years. She has always been my rock.

It’s a long story I don’t care repeating.
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(y)
 
My son died unexpectedly Jan. 2022 and because of too high funeral costs, my two daughters and I could only afford cremation for him. This was so antithetical to me that I can not even bear to see his urn 'box'. My older daughter has it in her apartment.
I 'birthed' the 'vessel' he had resided in. It held his God given life. Fed it, washed it, made it comfortable, hugged it, cared and loved it as best I knew how. To have it reduced to mostly tiny bits of bones resembling ash through exposure to flame and intense heat followed by pulverization of bone fragments" tormented me.

I wish I could have had him have an Earth Funeral.
 
Elsie said:
My son died unexpectedly Jan. 2022 and because of too high funeral costs, my two daughters and I could only afford cremation for him. This was so antithetical to me that I can not even bear to see his urn 'box'. My older daughter has it in her apartment.
I 'birthed' the 'vessel' he had resided in. It held his God given life. Fed it, washed it, made it comfortable, hugged it, cared and loved it as best I knew how. To have it reduced to mostly tiny bits of bones resembling ash through exposure to flame and intense heat followed by pulverization of bone fragments" tormented me.

I wish I could have had him have an Earth Funeral.
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I understand people’s reasons for burying their closest relatives. It’s good to be able to visit the gravesites of loved ones. I know some people have purchased niches for after cremation for this reason.
 
A caution about "donating my body to science". While it may seem you have been accepted into the program, it's not something you can count on. Depending on circumstances at your death, your body can be denied. As an RN, I've seen that happen 3 times.
 
I appear to be in the minority. I know this is silly, but I have a fear of being burned up in a fire. I'm also claustrophobic and the thought of being buried underground in a sealed coffin is unsettling. I guess I'm between a rock and a hard spot. My husband and I have everything prepaid for and we're being buried in a cemetery out in the country. My husband predeceased me, and it really helped ease the transition having everything preplanned and paid for.
 
Jack Frost said:
Hi Honey. This is may help you as it has helped me. My parents gravesite is a 21 hour drive away but I manage to visit often. What I do is go to google earth. Put in the address of the cemetery then go to the gravesite and zoom in. This is better than no visits. Let me know how you make out using this method. Enjoy your day, Frostie
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I do the same thing. I go through find a grave. You can leave virtual flowers which makes it nice since my parents are buried a distance away from where I live.
 
Nathan said:
Being embalmed and having your corpse made up like a mannequin and put on display in a coffin for a funeral is...beyond gross. I regret viewing 'the body' at the funerals I've attended, I don't want to put my family and friends through any of that.
Cremation, then the living can do a celebration of [my] life if they choose. Whatever they decide, I promise I won't be offended.
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MACKTEXAS said:
I saw more preferences for cremation in the thread than I expected to see, and more concern over running out of land for burials. That's fine. I understand most of the reasons given.

We've already paid for the lots. If I don't use mine, it will serve no purpose to the world. I will be buried next to my wife, as she wanted.
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My husband and I preplanned and prepaid our funeral. I am so glad we did. When he passed away, it made an already stressful time less stressful. I'm not having a funeral, but it gives me peace of mind (I know it's just psychological) that I will be buried next to him.
 
I guess the issue is about letting go. Your love one is gone. Where are they? Do I cremate them and bring the ashes into my home? Do I bury them at a cemetery? Extremely tough. Where are they? Can I reach them?
Lose is something that no one, no belief, no faith, that can ever give you comfort.
Lose is painful, frustrating and unforgiving in what it takes from us.
On the other hand we all know that our fate is no different than the fate of those we are morning. That is scary but true.
So............how to deal with lose? How to deal with our loss of those we love.
Don't know.
Bear up, go on. Bear the pain. Love them and miss them till the day that you join them. Not easy, not comforting. Just the way it is.
 

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