What happens in the mind when you stop believing something.

bobcat

bobcat

Well-known Member
Location
Northern Calif
Beliefs can be a significant part of who we are, and therefore part of our identity. But sometimes in life (Assuming we seek truth), we may feel dissonance between what we believe and unavoidable reality. It seems there is a threshold, and once it is reached, we have to do some serious reckoning to resolve it.
Letting go of a long-held belief often triggers a profound psychological shift—one that can feel both liberating, as it frees you from the dissonance, but it can also be destabilizing. The mind has to undergo a recalibration that may evoke some serious emotional turbulence.

But does one feel they have progressed from an outdated ideology to a more grounded one, and does it provide a newfound freedom, and release tension? It may leave a void where certainty once lived, but how does one navigate the transition? Letting go of long held beliefs isn't something humans do very well, but living in denial isn't easy either unless one has a closed mind. Perhaps desire is a key element, and as long as the desire exists, the belief will as well. Whatever the case, the journey from one belief to another may take some time for the brain to rewire.


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I’m ok with changing long held beliefs or opinions if the change is fact based.

Things like buying a car vs leasing or owning a home vs renting.

Sometimes it’s just looking at them from a different perspective or period in your life.

More often, my beliefs don’t change as much as I just stop caring or realize that in the end they won’t make a material difference in my life.
 
Aunt Bea said:
More often, my beliefs don’t change as much as I just stop caring or realize that in the end they won’t make a material difference in my life.
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I've had that experience too, but I've also had an occasional epiphany and an emotional high when it clears away dissonance and creates more order. There are probably other reasons for the high too, but I've never thought about this that much before.
 

bobcat said:
It may leave a void where certainty once lived, but how does one navigate the transition? Letting go of long held beliefs isn't something humans do very well, but living in denial isn't easy either unless one has a closed mind. Perhaps desire is a key element, and as long as the desire exists, the belief will as well. Whatever the case, the journey from one belief to another may take some time for the brain to rewire.
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I'm applying the OP to theological and philosophical beliefs.

I don't see how absolute certainty is attainable in these matters. I have enough confidence in my beliefs that I have held onto them, but I have never experienced a feeling of absolute certainty, nor do I feel that anyone does, no matter how they try to convince us otherwise.

If and when a credible challenge to my beliefs is presented, I consider it, examine it, and do not let it go until I come to peace with it, whatever the outcome may be. There are times I have modified how I believe.
 
From what I have read, the brain uses about 20% of the body's energy and yet it is far less in terms of body mass, so it has figured out ways to conserve on energy. It simple terms, it often takes the shortcut, which is why we often make snap judgments. In terms of changing one's mind about long held beliefs, it takes much less energy to deny contrary evidence, or slightly modify it, than it does to tear down the metaphorical house, and start over.

There are many things in life that we feel very strongly about, whether it's political, religious, civil rights, law enforcements, capital punishment, abortion, war, substance use, etc..., and it's not often that one changes their view on those things, but it can and does happen sometimes. One thing I can say is it's humbling. It happened to me, and took over 5 years of honest assessment, but looking back now, I realize how wrong I was.
 
bobcat said:
There are many things in life that we feel very strongly about, whether it's political, religious, civil rights, law enforcements, capital punishment, abortion, war, substance use, etc..., and it's not often that one changes their view on those things, but it can and does happen sometimes.
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Your list takes in a lot of complex matters, and I have done a complete about-face on several of those.
 
bobcat said:
Beliefs can be a significant part of who we are, and therefore part of our identity. But sometimes in life (Assuming we seek truth), we may feel dissonance between what we believe and unavoidable reality. It seems there is a threshold, and once it is reached, we have to do some serious reckoning to resolve it.
Letting go of a long-held belief often triggers a profound psychological shift—one that can feel both liberating, as it frees you from the dissonance, but it can also be destabilizing. The mind has to undergo a recalibration that may evoke some serious emotional turbulence.

But does one feel they have progressed from an outdated ideology to a more grounded one, and does it provide a newfound freedom, and release tension? It may leave a void where certainty once lived, but how does one navigate the transition? Letting go of long held beliefs isn't something humans do very well, but living in denial isn't easy either unless one has a closed mind. Perhaps desire is a key element, and as long as the desire exists, the belief will as well. Whatever the case, the journey from one belief to another may take some time for the brain to rewire.
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Adolescence is a time of cognitive change as well as physical growth. For some, both are fixed for the rest of their lives but other periods of emotional or cognitive change can occur later in life. For me the age of 33 was a time when I let go of what I thought were truisms and accepted faith. My linear mind discovered a multi-dimensional field that is inclusive of faith and mystery. There is no tension left and I embrace life and all that it brings; the good and the bad, the pleasure and the pain.
 
When I was young, I was against abortion being legal. As I grew, learned and matured, I realized that it was an individual choice only to be made by the mother. I also realized that what might be right for me is not necessarily right for another person.

I was raised in the Lutheran Church and accepted religion as a belief and part of my life. At 31 I went to college and gradually during those three years that it took me to obtain my bachelors degree I took a 180 on the subject of religion.

The funny thing about that is, I was attending a Lutheran College and was required to take both the old and New Testament classes and initially I was unhappy about it. The classes were taught by Lutheran professors that had been Luther ministers previously. I ended up loving the courses.However, they taught those two courses as history versus religion.

It was a college that had a great reputation for teachers and many Catholic nuns attended there and became teachers. At that time, I got so fascinated with religion courses there that I ended up with a minor.

It was also during that time that I determined that both the Bible and God were made up by man to explain things that uneducated people of the past could not understand. It also taught those people a moral code to live by. I also realized that I didn’t need any of that in my life to help other people and be a good person.
 
For me personally, my mind went through somersaults when I gave up organized religion. I knew I was gay when I was 9 years old, but I grew up in the Baptist church where being gay meant going to Hell. I carried that with me through high school, hid it and hated myself. However, even after giving up organized religion I felt a sense of guilt through most of my adult life, so giving up the belief didn't eliminate the feelings of guilt. After so many years, it was somewhat traumatic admitting I didn't believe in the God I was taught about in my youth. I was probably in my 50s when I finally felt at peace.
 
Depends what it is. If it's learning that someone you thought you knew is suddenly very different, it at first hurts of course. But then
I let it go, and leave them alone unless they reach out, I don't tend to burn bridges keeping up that attitude drains me.
I was let down over an organized religion thing and was sad, but chose to retain the good things and memories of the good people
I did meet and learned from then just moved on. It was not the ideals of the teachings that let me down it was a flaw in the church
guidelines set by humans.
I have changed my mind on some things in my life and sometimes went back to what I believed before. I know if I am at peace with
myself, how I live and treat others I am good. I also know I should be doing more and that is what I feel guilty most about and wrestle
with. "Am I really doing all I can or are my excuses bigger than my desire to do more?"
I really do rely on my Grandfather's and Grt Grandmother's teachings, those have never steered me wrong.
 
astralcat said:
Depending on how strong your beliefs are, once you stop believing for whatever reason, I would think there would be a feeling of guilt and confusion and most certainly cognitive dissonance. This could manifest in a lot of mental stress. In time, the person may find peace and rebuild on a new belief system.
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True for some from what I think I have observed from human behavior, but I don't think it's true for everyone. It was certainly not like that for me. My changes in belief seemed to bring more order and clarity into my life.
 
Teacher Terry said:
I was raised in the Lutheran Church and accepted religion as a belief and part of my life. At 31 I went to college and gradually during those three years that it took me to obtain my bachelors degree I took a 180 on the subject of religion.

The funny thing about that is, I was attending a Lutheran College and was required to take both the old and New Testament classes and initially I was unhappy about it. The classes were taught by Lutheran professors that had been Luther ministers previously. I ended up loving the courses.However, they taught those two courses as history versus religion.

It was a college that had a great reputation for teachers and many Catholic nuns attended there and became teachers. At that time, I got so fascinated with religion courses there that I ended up with a minor.

It was also during that time that I determined that both the Bible and God were made up by man to explain things that uneducated people of the past could not understand. It also taught those people a moral code to live by. I also realized that I didn’t need any of that in my life to help other people and be a good person.
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Participating in organizations that have cult like aspects, and studying a belief system seriously and critically from the inside leads to one of two things, indoctrination or rejection. Not everyone reacts the same way. I was raised Lutheran and tried to hang on to the philosophy for years trying to solve the cognitive dissonances, and eventually just decided to leave all religion behind.
 
seadoug said:
For me personally, my mind went through somersaults when I gave up organized religion. I knew I was gay when I was 9 years old, but I grew up in the Baptist church where being gay meant going to Hell. I carried that with me through high school, hid it and hated myself. However, even after giving up organized religion I felt a sense of guilt through most of my adult life, so giving up the belief didn't eliminate the feelings of guilt. After so many years, it was somewhat traumatic admitting I didn't believe in the God I was taught about in my youth. I was probably in my 50s when I finally felt at peace.
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I appreciate you expressing your perspective. No single denomination has a monopoly on truth, or what they perceive as truth.
 
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Paco Dennis said:
I was once told by my Buddhist "teacher" to cultivate doubt.
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I like that. We should cultivate doubt. Doubt is not a negative as some people like to categorize it. It opens doors. I was taught at a young age that doubt was a sin. Of course that was only true when it was about Baptist beliefs. And although I was taught that, I never accepted that doubt was a sin

Paco Dennis said:
Most all belief requires faith. Whatever it is can not be proved, but still one thinks it is real, or true. What ruins belief is doubt. For me when faced with new info, I never believe it is true. It takes many different sources and patience before I start believing anything.
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As often happens, a theist says to me, "Well you believe in something." I see a person who is trying to put our observations of reality on an equal playing field. But in fact, I don't believe much of anything. I believe some beliefs are better reflections of reality than others, but there is always doubt in the best of them, or at least in parts of them.
 
I very much have never been a black and white thinker but rather with complex issues tend to think in relative terms. I am like a small twig floating down the vast Mississippi River in flood, unable to have effect on the passing world. I've loosely evolved my casual views over many popular controversies, not because I had strong beliefs one way or another but rather because of lack of understanding issues in depth. I simply have had little interest spending time to understand many worldly issues like abortion, death penalty, wars, etc especially those I will never be able to affect. So at most, I might lean in one direction or the other without black and white beliefs. Thus are easy to change positions without personal psychological effects.
 
bobcat said:
Letting go of long held beliefs isn't something humans do very well, but living in denial isn't easy either unless one has a closed mind. Perhaps desire is a key element, and as long as the desire exists, the belief will as well. Whatever the case, the journey from one belief to another may take some time for the brain to rewire.


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One thing about being in denial is that the person who is in denial doesn't know it. Rest assured other people do, however.
 

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