My memory is getting really bad

@debodun I understand how you feel. I have the same trouble. Especially with names. Sometimes when they ask me in the ER what my birthdate is I will find myself stumbling over the answer with the word uh...and I have to stop and think about it.

I don't know if this has anything to do with it but, I rarely call people by their name when speaking to them. I just see them and talk to them. Maybe that has something to do with it. I have a lot of other things on my mind that are more important at work than recalling someone's name.

Plus people don't talk to me much so I think it affects my social skills to keep me from remembering their names.
 

debodun said:
Why is it names we have trouble with?
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I have always had trouble with names but now I also have difficulty recalling even common nouns. If I stop trying the word will pop into my head about 20 minutes later. I once had a pretty formidable vocabulary but the aging brain inevitably slows down.

If I could flush out the trivia and other useless stored words, I might have faster access to the ones I want.

If it turns out that I have already replied to your question, you will have a demonstration of how faulty my memory has become.
 
I volunteer at our local animal shelter where I work with dogs, cats and other volunteers and staff.

I find it hilarious that I have zero trouble remembering the animal names, but struggle to remember the human ones! 🤣

It’s the same if I meet someone new socially and either we talk about pets or they have one or more. I will struggle to remember their name but can always recall the pet names. 🤦‍♀️
 
Sunkist said:
Do you possibly know how people develop these traits?

I'd been wondering since a family member mentioned something slightly similar around a year ago- cannot visualize.. and it occurred to me I can't either.. if I close my eyes, all I see is blackness. I can bring up 'memories' or 'photographs' in my mind, but not actual images of anything..

Is this trait my family member and I have similar to what you described about yourself?
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I have it too; only see nothing (not even blackness) when I close my eyes.
 
There are helpful resources. For example, MyHealth will have all your doctor names (and I have used it this way btw). If you do not have a myHealth (or equivalent online medical account), consider getting one - it is almost a necessity for seniors.

For other things, a search engine like DuckDuckGo can help to find forgotten things.

Or just write down a list of different things.

I could not tell you my eye doctor’s name right now even though I have seen him 4 times now. But I know where to find his name. But I do remember my eye pressure (glaucoma) results - we tend to remember the important stuff!
 
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MarciKS said:
@debodun I understand how you feel. I have the same trouble. Especially with names. Sometimes when they ask me in the ER what my birthdate is I will find myself stumbling over the answer with the word uh...and I have to stop and think about it.
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Sometimes when they ask me what my birthday is, I'll say "It's next week, but you don't have to get me anything"
Either that or I tell them I'm getting my DOB legally changed to 1995

I have trouble with names too.
 
Dr.Colosso said:
Lol I had a colleague. When I forget a name I say: heyyyyyy! Hey how are you doing? But she LOL. Hey Eric can you do this and that? I'm Peter. Oh whatever. LOL She would continuously call people by the wrong name and she did not care one bit. It was so funny. I don't think anyone else cared either.
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Oh my goodness! I would never :ROFLMAO:

I worked for the same company for 25 years, and basically knew everyone - but ask me their name and I was lost. It was only bad when I ran into people outside of work and needed to make introductions. I would tell my husband, introduce yourself! I don't remember their name!!
 
I play hours of chess at Chess.com and Civilization VI at Steam.com and my memory is intensely active every day. In addition I am an active stock trader and follow the markets all the time. I've made many millions in my stock trading. I am doing all this at 90 years of age. One must keep one's brain active every minute of every day and then one's brain function and financial success will only die at death!
 
That is normal for older brains, just like presbyopia. If one wants to remember names of whatever, one needs to regularly access names with thinking. All brain neuroconnections degenerate over time without use and more recent connections of related information may blur and or contaminate them. I temporarily forget familiar people's names frequently that often just requires some minutes to pop back into awareness. Some people's names I always have trouble with. To remedy such, say if it is some celebrity actor's name, go into Wikipedia and read up on them in detail that will rebuild one neural connections. If it is an old acquaintance, spend some time thinking of where, what, when with them in the past, including their faces.

A very real concern! (becoming forgetful)

Instead of watching more inane TV shows over a few evenings, highly recommend reading this popular bestselling 2021 book (Amazon, $6 used), anyone will find fascinating:

https://www.amazon.com/Remember-Science-Memory-Art-Forgetting/dp/0593137973/ref=sr_1_1

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A fascinating exploration of the intricacies of how we remember, why we forget, and what we can do to protect our memories, from the Harvard-trained neuroscientist and bestselling author of Still Alice.

“Using her expertise as a neuroscientist and her gifts as a storyteller, Lisa Genova explains the nuances of human memory”—Steven Pinker, Johnstone Professor of Psychology, Harvard University, author of How the Mind Works

Have you ever felt a crushing wave of panic when you can't for the life of you remember the name of that actor in the movie you saw last week, or you walk into a room only to forget why you went there in the first place? If you're over forty, you're probably not laughing. You might even be worried that these lapses in memory could be an early sign of Alzheimer's or dementia. In reality, for the vast majority of us, these examples of forgetting are completely normal.

Why? Because while memory is amazing, it is far from perfect. Our brains aren't designed to remember every name we hear, plan we make, or day we experience. Just because your memory sometimes fails doesn't mean it's broken or succumbing to disease. Forgetting is actually part of being human.

In Remember, neuroscientist and acclaimed novelist Lisa Genova delves into how memories are made and how we retrieve them. You'll learn whether forgotten memories are temporarily inaccessible or erased forever and why some memories are built to exist for only a few seconds (like a passcode) while others can last a lifetime (your wedding day). You'll come to appreciate the clear distinction between normal forgetting (where you parked your car) and forgetting due to Alzheimer's (that you own a car). And you'll see how memory is profoundly impacted by meaning, emotion, sleep, stress, and context.

Once you understand the language of memory and how it functions, its incredible strengths and maddening weaknesses, its natural vulnerabilities and potential superpowers, you can both vastly improve your ability to remember and feel less rattled when you inevitably forget. You can set educated expectations for your memory, and in doing so, create a better relationship with it. You don't have to fear it anymore. And that can be life-changing.
 
I still would recommend that every person play chess at Chess.com and Civilization VI at Steam.com. I've been playing those games for the last 20 years and my memory at age 90 is still in great shape. In addition, all folks playing those 2 games can get immense enjoyment trying to win competitive games EVERY DAY.!
 
hollydolly said:
No... my condition is..if I met you tomorrow say in a cafe.. we spoke.. and then I didn't see you again until the next day , but this time you were somewhere different I wouldn't recognise you... In fact I need to have seen you about at least 12 times in the same cafe before I would even recognise you in there... but I still wouldnt recognise you somewhere else like in the bank or in the supermarket....until I'd either worked with you and saw you dozens of times.... or you lived near me and equally I'd seen you many, many times.

I couldn't recognise my own child when she was little . I'd go to school to pick her up.. all the children wore the same school uniform...and I would be standing at the gate thinking, I hope I spot her.. but she'd be there in front of me..saying Mum.. I'm right here..

I walk past people all the time who I have known for decades, but because I haven't seen them in say..a year or 2.. then I don't recognise them at all.. .. and I'm accused of being stuck up and ignoring people... the only way I recognise people is from a distance by their walk... it's like a fingerprint for me.. every person's walk is different.. so as long as someone is at least 20 feet in front of me so I can see the walk.. then that's the only way i recognise people ... or of course if they talk to me first


there was a classic example of that today. One of the bosses of the builders came ot the door I opened it, he says hello..I reply the same.. and he says , ''don't you remember me, I'm D, I came last week to have a look at the job here ... but of course I didn't recognise him at all... ..so I cover it up with a '' Oh I'm so sorry I had my mind on other things ''... but in truth I had no clue who he was...
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I don't think I've ever heard of such a condition. It's obvious that you have made allowances along the way during life. You're a brave lady.
 
Following a diagnosis of Alzheimers in an extended family member I became more conscious of some of my memory foibles. I was considering the new blood test that can detect some of the markers present in those who do or may have alzheimers in the future. Since my physical health is much better than my wife's, I wondered if my memory was going to fail me and indirectlly my wife as well. I needed answers.

I visited a doctor capable of giving me the answer to my doubts. I was subjected to a series of tests of my memory that extended for many hours. In addition a careful review of all medical records to include the medications that I take regularly was taken into account.

The end conclusion, alzheimes was negative. However I was experiencing some memory issues, some common for one my age, others worth dealing with. The doctor requested that my primary physician consider some alternatives to two medications. I also engaged in some new daily mental activities to exercise my brain. I'm not suggesting that my memory miraculously improved but I am more confident that I can deal with it, and will continue to get checkups if I note deterioration.
 
David777 said:
That is normal for older brains, just like presbyopia. If one wants to remember names of whatever, one needs to regularly access names with thinking. All brain neuroconnections degenerate over time without use and more recent connections of related information may blur and or contaminate them. I temporarily forget familiar people's names frequently that often just requires some minutes to pop back into awareness. Some people's names I always have trouble with. To remedy such, say if it is some celebrity actor's name, go into Wikipedia and read up on them in detail that will rebuild one neural connections. If it is an old acquaintance, spend some time thinking of where, what, when with them in the past, including their faces.

A very real concern! (becoming forgetful)

Instead of watching more inane TV shows over a few evenings, highly recommend reading this popular bestselling 2021 book (Amazon, $6 used), anyone will find fascinating:

https://www.amazon.com/Remember-Science-Memory-Art-Forgetting/dp/0593137973/ref=sr_1_1

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A fascinating exploration of the intricacies of how we remember, why we forget, and what we can do to protect our memories, from the Harvard-trained neuroscientist and bestselling author of Still Alice.

“Using her expertise as a neuroscientist and her gifts as a storyteller, Lisa Genova explains the nuances of human memory”—Steven Pinker, Johnstone Professor of Psychology, Harvard University, author of How the Mind Works

Have you ever felt a crushing wave of panic when you can't for the life of you remember the name of that actor in the movie you saw last week, or you walk into a room only to forget why you went there in the first place? If you're over forty, you're probably not laughing. You might even be worried that these lapses in memory could be an early sign of Alzheimer's or dementia. In reality, for the vast majority of us, these examples of forgetting are completely normal.

Why? Because while memory is amazing, it is far from perfect. Our brains aren't designed to remember every name we hear, plan we make, or day we experience. Just because your memory sometimes fails doesn't mean it's broken or succumbing to disease. Forgetting is actually part of being human.

In Remember, neuroscientist and acclaimed novelist Lisa Genova delves into how memories are made and how we retrieve them. You'll learn whether forgotten memories are temporarily inaccessible or erased forever and why some memories are built to exist for only a few seconds (like a passcode) while others can last a lifetime (your wedding day). You'll come to appreciate the clear distinction between normal forgetting (where you parked your car) and forgetting due to Alzheimer's (that you own a car). And you'll see how memory is profoundly impacted by meaning, emotion, sleep, stress, and context.

Once you understand the language of memory and how it functions, its incredible strengths and maddening weaknesses, its natural vulnerabilities and potential superpowers, you can both vastly improve your ability to remember and feel less rattled when you inevitably forget. You can set educated expectations for your memory, and in doing so, create a better relationship with it. You don't have to fear it anymore. And that can be life-changing.
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I got the large print book through our library system. I am reading it now.
 
David777 said:
That is normal for older brains, just like presbyopia. If one wants to remember names of whatever, one needs to regularly access names with thinking. All brain neuroconnections degenerate over time without use and more recent connections of related information may blur and or contaminate them. I temporarily forget familiar people's names frequently that often just requires some minutes to pop back into awareness. Some people's names I always have trouble with. To remedy such, say if it is some celebrity actor's name, go into Wikipedia and read up on them in detail that will rebuild one neural connections. If it is an old acquaintance, spend some time thinking of where, what, when with them in the past, including their faces.

A very real concern! (becoming forgetful)

Instead of watching more inane TV shows over a few evenings, highly recommend reading this popular bestselling 2021 book (Amazon, $6 used), anyone will find fascinating:

https://www.amazon.com/Remember-Science-Memory-Art-Forgetting/dp/0593137973/ref=sr_1_1

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A fascinating exploration of the intricacies of how we remember, why we forget, and what we can do to protect our memories, from the Harvard-trained neuroscientist and bestselling author of Still Alice.

“Using her expertise as a neuroscientist and her gifts as a storyteller, Lisa Genova explains the nuances of human memory”—Steven Pinker, Johnstone Professor of Psychology, Harvard University, author of How the Mind Works

Have you ever felt a crushing wave of panic when you can't for the life of you remember the name of that actor in the movie you saw last week, or you walk into a room only to forget why you went there in the first place? If you're over forty, you're probably not laughing. You might even be worried that these lapses in memory could be an early sign of Alzheimer's or dementia. In reality, for the vast majority of us, these examples of forgetting are completely normal.

Why? Because while memory is amazing, it is far from perfect. Our brains aren't designed to remember every name we hear, plan we make, or day we experience. Just because your memory sometimes fails doesn't mean it's broken or succumbing to disease. Forgetting is actually part of being human.

In Remember, neuroscientist and acclaimed novelist Lisa Genova delves into how memories are made and how we retrieve them. You'll learn whether forgotten memories are temporarily inaccessible or erased forever and why some memories are built to exist for only a few seconds (like a passcode) while others can last a lifetime (your wedding day). You'll come to appreciate the clear distinction between normal forgetting (where you parked your car) and forgetting due to Alzheimer's (that you own a car). And you'll see how memory is profoundly impacted by meaning, emotion, sleep, stress, and context.

Once you understand the language of memory and how it functions, its incredible strengths and maddening weaknesses, its natural vulnerabilities and potential superpowers, you can both vastly improve your ability to remember and feel less rattled when you inevitably forget. You can set educated expectations for your memory, and in doing so, create a better relationship with it. You don't have to fear it anymore. And that can be life-changing.
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Thanks, David. I just ordered Remember from Abebooks. $5.58 including shipping. I see the author also wrote Still Alice, a novel about Alzheimers which I read years ago..
 
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