True Bar Stories ..

The Creepers who think you have a 'for sale' sign on your forehead

The creepers come in many varieties. The worst ones are the ones that act normal before they pull out the creeper routine. The creepers can come from any walk of life, any background. I really can't stand them. There were waaaaay too many I'll give 2 examples.

Creeper 1- Diamond dealer brought me a diamond bracelet in a fancy box and wanted me to take a ride in his fancy car after I closed up. I told him I did not accept gifts or date the customers. I was ticked off and griping about him to the cocktail waitress who said " He's right up my alley. Which one is he?" So, unfortunately some women are at fault for making these creepers think all women like to be bought like livestock.
Creeper 2- He was the worst one. He really hurt my feelings. I thought he was a friend of a sort. A very wealthy man who came in often and was jovial. Then one night he offered me an indecent proposal. I hate him. I felt betrayed... and stupid.
 

SifuPhil said:
LOL!

Had a customer get very aggressive one time at closing. He refused to leave and tried going behind the bar to attack the (female) bartender.
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I feel so cheated. Dang. Why didn't I ever have a bouncer? That crap happens a lot.
 
BlunderWoman said:
I feel so cheated. Dang. Why didn't I ever have a bouncer? That crap happens a lot.
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Everyone should have a bouncer! :devilish:

The first time I ever bounced was in New York City at a fairly large and famous strip club. Being 18 years old, there were a lot of things I had to learn about the world.

The bouncers there knew it. They told me there was a problem in the women's dressing room. I ran to the back of the club, burst through the dressing room door, only to find all of the dancers - gorgeous, long-legged 18-25 year olds - posing naked on chairs, countertops and the floor, laughing their brains out.

I went into instant brain lock and was blushing the rest of my first night.
 

The Vomit Queens

Usually these are the women who drink those silly sweet drinks to excess on the weekends & can never hold their booze. They spew. It's gross.

The one funny one was when these two young women that looked like beautiful models came in and sat up at the bar. They began to shoot tequila shots. I told them " You might want to slow down there not everyone can handle tequila." They said " Oh not us we can handle our liquor!" I went back to minding my business. Men sat up at the bar they crowded around these two beauties buying them more shots. Then it happened... One of them spewed like a fire hose all over the bar all over the men next to her. This created a mass gag reflex and other spewers. It was a nightmare I tell ya. She passed out face down at the bar in her own vomit. He girlfriend was in the bathroom hugging the toilet and just left her there.
I WAS NOT a happy camper that night .
 
SifuPhil said:
Everyone should have a bouncer! :devilish:

The first time I ever bounced was in New York City at a fairly large and famous strip club. Being 18 years old, there were a lot of things I had to learn about the world.

The bouncers there knew it. They told me there was a problem in the women's dressing room. I ran to the back of the club, burst through the dressing room door, only to find all of the dancers - gorgeous, long-legged 18-25 year olds - posing naked on chairs, countertops and the floor, laughing their brains out.

I went into instant brain lock and was blushing the rest of my first night.
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wow can't believe they hired someone so young and green. Someone who hired you saw something in you they liked.
 
The Wannabe Strippers who later want to die..

These are the ones who over indulge and lose their dang mind.

Had one blond skinny one just pop up on a table and start taking it all off to a crowd of cheering men. That bar was not a strip club. I had to come out from behind the bar grab her clothes and actually dress her like a toddler in the bathroom, stick her in a cab & send her home.
 
The Married Men That Like To Make Their Wives Feel Bad

These are the men that will keep coming on to you in front of a blushing, sad, embarrassed wife. I consider them scum. I never speak directly to them or look at them. I speak to the wife only. Forget the tip. Us sistas got to stick together.
 
BlunderWoman said:
The Wannabe Strippers who later want to die..

These are the ones who over indulge and lose their dang mind.

Had one blond skinny one just pop up on a table and start taking it all off to a crowd of cheering men. That bar was not a strip club. I had to come out from behind the bar grab her clothes and actually dress her like a toddler in the bathroom, stick her in a cab & send her home.
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LOL - the power of alcohol!
 
BlunderWoman said:
The Married Men That Like To Make Their Wives Feel Bad

These are the men that will keep coming on to you in front of a blushing, sad, embarrassed wife. I consider them scum. I never speak directly to them or look at them. I speak to the wife only. Forget the tip. Us sistas got to stick together.
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And then there was The Lady and The Pet.

Woman comes in one night, just a regular Wednesday, no big deal, middle of the week and all.

She is gorgeous - dressed in black leather and stiletto boots. The second she walked through the door my head swiveled her way.

A moment later in walks in, ON A LEASH, a guy. She's pulling on the leash. He's dressed in a revealing little sort of jumpsuit.

They sit down at the bar like nobody's business. She orders a mixed drink for herself and a small glass of water for her pet. He waits until she takes a long draught of her drink, then starts to vigorously lap at his glass of water.

This goes on all night. The regulars were shocked into silence for the first time. The dancers loved it - finally, a GUY being subjected to discipline and domination. The Lady and The Pet became regulars after that, and once I got The Lady's permission I spoke with The Pet, who proved to be a very intelligent man.

Life is amazing.
 
The Stalkers

These are in no way funny. They are scary dangerous men. The spider that waits in the dark. For some reason they obsess and fixate on you. I had two of them. I will tell one story only because the other story is really bad.

This one man kept calling me and calling me. I thought he was a random obscene phone caller. I had no idea he knew who I was and where I lived. I don't know how he knew where I lived unless he followed me home.

I was sitting home on my night off watching a movie when I saw my front door knob being turned. I went to the door I said " Who is it?" He said " I'll be in in a minute." Then I said " Get away from my door right now!" He said " No way baby I'm coming in." I grabbed a knife out of a drawer and waited. He never came in.
The next night at work I got the regular nightly call from the obscene phone caller only he changed his usual routine.. he said " I didn't get you last night. Someone came down the hall. Don't worry tonight I'll be back." That's when I connected them. I had a cop friend of mine go home with me that same night and help me move to a temporary motel.
 
SifuPhil said:
And then there was The Lady and The Pet.

Woman comes in one night, just a regular Wednesday, no big deal, middle of the week and all.

She is gorgeous - dressed in black leather and stiletto boots. The second she walked through the door my head swiveled her way.

A moment later in walks in, ON A LEASH, a guy. She's pulling on the leash. He's dressed in a revealing little sort of jumpsuit.

They sit down at the bar like nobody's business. She orders a mixed drink for herself and a small glass of water for her pet. He waits until she takes a long draught of her drink, then starts to vigorously lap at his glass of water.

This goes on all night. The regulars were shocked into silence for the first time. The dancers loved it - finally, a GUY being subjected to discipline and domination. The Lady and The Pet became regulars after that, and once I got The Lady's permission I spoke with The Pet, who proved to be a very intelligent man.

Life is amazing.
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LOL LOL LOL


Yup. Phil I had a guy offer to pay me 20 bucks for every time I called him a 'piece of sh..'. I said "NO! You disgusting pig!" He said " Here's twenty that's good too. May I buy you some shoes?"
 
That stalker story IS scary, BW - hope it all turned out okay. As you can imagine things like that happened to the dancers a lot.

The POS story is hilarious!
 
SifuPhil said:
That stalker story IS scary, BW - hope it all turned out okay. As you can imagine things like that happened to the dancers a lot.

The POS story is hilarious!
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One turned out ok after I moved. The other.. well it's just a very bad story
 
My favorite story

This old man comes in and sits at the bar. He starts up a tab. He sits there smiling and drinking all night. At closing time I ask him to pay his tab. He says " I can't. Sue me. I'm an inmate of a nursing home down the road." I laughed my butt off. It was a good one. Hey he deserved some fun. I paid his tab and called him a cab and paid for that. Funny old man pulled one over on me :D
 
Guess there's one in every bar.

I had a guy couldn't pay his tab. I went all puffy on him, until he told me he was Italian, on SS disability and was a WWII vet.

I melted, paid his tab and it became a weekly thing.

Wonder whatever happened to him - good ol' Tony Cha-Cha (he'd get up from his stool every so often and do a little cha-cha LOL)
 
Oy that I don't have any bar stories. In my youth someone would exclaim " I never saw a chick drink so much!" then someone would carry me home. No stories I can remember;):p
 

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