Fat shaming, the last "acceptable" prejudice.

Shalimar

Shalimar

SF VIP
Location
Vancouver Island Canada
Understandably enough, people are talking about the recent incident involving the gorilla and the three year old boy at the zoo. Clearly, the parents did not exercise due caution. However, when someone I highly respect


recently informed me that when incidents of parental negligence occur, it is usually the result of "some big fat mother being too busy filling her face to watch over her child," I was stunned. I have been obese, even

morbidly obese. At one point, I topped the scale at 240lbs. Part of that sad time, I had a small child in tow. At no point was my capacity to parent responsibly, determined by my inability to control my weight. As a

therapist, I see the pain and suffering this thoughtless/cruel body shaming approach inflicts on people who have committed the "sin" of having the fat gene, compounded, in many cases, by depression or trauma. I was

able to lose the weight, but must remain forever vigilant, forced, since my thirties, to eat no more than one meal a day if I wish to remain slender. Not everyone is as fortunate. This type of shaming kills people. It has

no place in a just society. Whatever reasons contributed to the three year old's tumbling into the gorilla cage, obesity was not a factor. Shame. Shame. Shame!
 

Churchill saved the world from some kind of fascist future with his ability to rally people and enlist Rooevelt's support. And men are shamed in large numbers too...
 
I think most people still believe that it is one of two things only, either individually or combined, that cause overweight. It's only over eating or under-moving. But medical science is now discovering the impact of generations of chemical toxicities that are actually changing our DNA. Most people (I think) have never even heard of this. So combine that lack of information with the innate 'meanness' of many people and you have this problem. The good news is, if humans can continue to evolve this way, then it's not a stretch to expect that we can continue to evolve spiritually and morally. We just have to be open to opening our minds and hearts.
 
At senior school, our headteacher was the much the same shape as the Michelin Man. One morning at assembly, he made the remark, "I know you call me the Fat Man", at which one pupil called from the back of the hall, "No, we call you The Gut".

Obviously the NHS in the UK does not recognise 'chemical toxicities'.... I quote from their website :

Some people claim there is no point in trying to lose weight because "it runs in my family" or "it's in my genes".

While there are some rare genetic conditions that can cause obesity, such as Prader-Willi syndrome, there is no reason why most people cannot lose weight. It may be true that certain genetic traits inherited from your parents – such as having a large appetite – may make losing weight more difficult, but it certainly doesn't make it impossible.

In many cases, obesity is more to do with environmental factors, such as poor eating habits learned during childhood.

It goes on to list various medical conditions that can lead to obesity if not treated.Unfortunately the NHS seems to regard anyone who is not stick thin as being overweight - I find that approach is very negative.
 
For whatever reasons, the fact remains that although I am an active person, unless I eat about half as much as those without a weight problem, I get fat. My mother, however, could eat anything without gaining an ounce. That was very cruel to treat a head teacher, or anyone with such blatant disrespect.
 
Shalimar, do you not remember your school days? Didn't you make fun of your teachers? Young people can be very cruel, but
you do not demand respect, you earn it. Some teachers were held in great respect , but he was a very dictatorial person. Even the teachers were somewhat in fear of him, but still made fun of him.
 
I think it depends on region too, perhaps ethnicity figures into it as well. We have a shopping center down the way with three stores...Target, Best Buy, and Whole Foods. Parked in the lot there's some interesting people watching. One species is the gaunt yoga lover. You know if they're shopping at Whole Foods they can frickin' afford to eat.

However as with obesity there are folks with illness or eating disorders. Some of them might be skin and bones unintentionally and they deserve sympathy. But then there are those plus sized women so very proud of their curves. Saw a beautiful woman the other day in a backless sun dress, heels and head wrap. So attractive she turned heads and I'm guessing at least size 16 if not more. Personal flair comes in all sizes:D
 
Shalimar said:
For whatever reasons, the fact remains that although I am an active person, unless I eat about half as much as those without a weight problem, I get fat. My mother, however, could eat anything without gaining an ounce. That was very cruel to treat a head teacher, or anyone with such blatant disrespect.
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I'm in the same boat Shali. My mother gained weight easily, too. Fat shaming is a horrible thing!! Just walking down the street I have been called names. It hurts, too.
 
I thought 'size 16' - that's not big, but then I realised you mean a US size 16. That would be a UK size 20 which is getting to be on the big side. The thing is to wear clothes that suit. Too many big people try to squeeze into smaller clothes and the result is that it makes them look bigger.
 
Some people see fat shaming as helping sort of as they do with being rude toward smokers, doesn't make sense, but, in their minds it does. As someone who has been up and down and every number good or bad weight wise, I can tell you, when I hear people fat shaming, I realize that they lack something within themselves, so, unless, they are picking on someone other than me I pay them no mind.

The struggles for many are real, no one wants to carry around a bunch of excess weight, it doesnt hurt me in people relations, but, its not great on the knees and health mostly. No one is harder on us than ourselves, honestly, and if it were as easy to lose and maintain a certain weight for all, there wouldn't be an obesity issue. Some of it may indeed be self fault, but, regardless, being mean spirited toward people out of ignorance, speaks to your own self-control, at least as a grown-up. But, I've been lucky to have encountered, mostly, terrific folks in real life when it comes to my weight gain. I absolutely would love to drop a good amount of weight, I seem to be on a perpetual treadmill of drop ten gain five, drop five gain five. I know cause and effect there isn't a sensible and nonsensable plan I haven't followed including just eat less,duh. Lol.
 
AprilT said:
Some people see fat shaming as helping sort of as they do with being rude toward smokers doesn't make sense but, in their minds it does. As someone who has been up and down and every number good or bad weight wise, I can tell you, when I hear people fat shaming, I realize that they lack something within themselves, so, unless, they are picking on someone other than me I pay them no mind.

The struggles for many are real, no one wants to carry around a bunch of excess weight, it doesnt hurt me in people relasions, but its not great on the knees an health mostly. No one is harder on us than ourselves, honestly and if it were as easy to lose and maintain a certain weight for all, there wouldn't be an obesity issue. Some of it may indeed be self fault, but, regardless, being mean spirited toward people out ignorance, speaks to your own self-control, at least as a grown-up. But, I've been lucky to have encountered, mostly, terrific folks in real life when it comes to my weight gain. I absolutely would love to drop a good amount of weight, I seem to be on a peptual treadmill of drop ten gain five, drop five gain five. I know cause and effect there isn't a sensible and nonsensable plan I haven't followed including just eat less,duh. Lol.
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When I think about it my weight and body is no one's but mine and no one's business but mine and those who make fun of it are really out of line. They wouldn't think of going up to an average size person and insulting their body.
 
Smokers and it's kind of different...But I wouldn't shame someone for smoking. I did it for many years. But I would definitely seek fresher air. When you don't do it yourself anymore the smell is pretty nasty.
 
Sometimes people will call someone (usually a woman) a "big fat whatever" just as an insult without even knowing if the maligned person is actually overweight. It's like the childish "big fat liar" -- meaning the person is big on lying and may not be physically large. I've seen it done on this BB.

I've also seen fat shaming in one thread here that is supposed to be a funny thread to make people laugh. This particular post nearly made me cry instead -- certainly made me angry.
 
I am convinced that a large portion of the Obesity problem is related to the additives being placed in our food...especially meat and poultry. The agriculture industry has been adding Steroids and Growth Hormones to the animal feed for several decades, and these Additives do NOT go away when the meat is processed. The grain and vegetable products are also a factor, as the GMO processes probably changes the nutrients in those items. It's all in the name of increasing production and profits, and I think we are seeing the results in the ever expanding waistlines of our population. Certainly, there are those who lay around in front of the TV all day, and consume a daily 12 pack of beer...I know a couple like that...and their 300lb+ weight is easily explainable....but when you see active people who try to eat moderate meals, still having to fight weight gain, it makes me suspect the quality of the food we get.
 
Capt. I made fun of my teachers also. I agree respect is earned. But unchecked bullying is unacceptable, and often turns adolescents into intolerant, arrogant, cruel adults. To criticise behaviour is one thing, to ridicule another's appearance is another kettle of fish.
 
Smoking is an addiction and one of the hardest to quit. So while I might think that smokers have brought their problem on themselves, I know that they are literally hooked even though they really want to quit. Some can just quit cold turkey, others can't.
 
I don't think many of us would be apologetic for our description of the principal. The comparison with the Michelin Man was made by the PE teacher! Had he been liked and respected, staff and pupils might have viewed him more kindly.

Don, while I can't say that hormones in beef don't affect weight gain in humans, surely if people believe it is to blame, a reduction in meat intake would be the first step to losing weight.
 

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