Victim of online dating scam: 'My whole life savings is gone'

KingsX

KingsX

Senior Member
Location
Texas
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I've never participated in on-line dating and never will...
but for those who do... be careful.


Queens victim of online dating scam: 'My whole life savings is gone'

Tuesday, July 24, 2018


" QUEENS, New York City (WABC) -- One of the victims of an online dating scam is speaking out, saying she was duped out of her entire life savings by a man preying on women looking for love.

The man pretends to be a Chase bank employee and gains his victims' trust with lengthy exchanges of texts, pictures and e-mails.

*

At least five women in our area have fallen victim to the same scam, prompting police in Tuckahoe, Mount Vernon and Tarrytown to launch an investigation. "


entire news report at link

http://abc7ny.com/technology/victim-of-online-dating-scam-my-whole-life-savings-is-gone/3817276/

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I have a certain amount of sympathy for the victims of these scams (not always female incidentally) but it’s been going on for years with many media reports, I just think it’s sad there are so many gullible and lonely people out there

Personally, I would never use a dating site and my suspicions would be aroused if a man asked me to buy him a cup of coffee, so he’d have no chance of getting his hands on my life savings !
 

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Always be aware of predators and grifters online. The minute someone asks for money or financial information no matter how inconsequential it seems run or stop the conversation/change the subject. Once they know you will talk about it they'll work you until they get what they want.

Also just be careful with personal information even among friends. I know someone who let their girl friend apply for some financial aid online to get in their good graces already knowing they weren't eligible. She might not be a total thief but she is an internet dummy and as fell victim to internet scams herself. She is nosy and ignorant. She lied to one of her boyfriend's doctors office saying she was his wife to get information. Problem is his wife passed away decades ago.

Point is do not give out personal information no matter how innocent or safe it seems. Personal information including finances are private and considered private for a reason.
 
Lesson number one!

"Money can't buy me love..." - John Lennon and Paul McCartney
2Q==

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Whether you date online or respond to a phishing email...WTH would someone send all their money to someone they've never met, or even met only once. I saw a story about a woman on Dr. Phil (I don't watch him but was channel surfing and the story caught my attention). This woman started an online relationship with a man claiming to be English. They emailed and I believe he had called her on a regular basis but every time he was supposed to come visit her, some emergency or crisis came up for which he needed money. Finally her daughter and SIL intervened.

They told her he was a scammer but she refused to believe it. After her life savings was gone, she needed to borrow from them to pay her mortgage. They loaned her money but soon found out that she was still sending money to him. Without much effort, between the Dr. Phil show and her daughter, they found a letter verbatim of what he had sent to her declaring his love. It was on a website for the taking....any scammer had access. Then they found out that his IP address was not in England. I think she had a recording of his voice and they said he didn't even sound English. It's sad that lonely woman looking for love can be duped like this! But as the saying goes, "a fool and (his/her) money are soon parted".
 
Here in Pennsylvania, a relative or even a non relative for that matter that is concerned that their elderly relative or friend is being scammed out of money, may intercede by collecting the e-mails or taped calls from the suspected scammer and take them to the DA's office. If he (the DA) is satisfied that this truly is a scam case, the DA can ask a judge to issue a subpoena to that relative's bank to have all withdraws halted until a further investigation may be completed. In the mean time, he (the judge) will appoint a guardian of the account for the purpose to only pay necessary bills, such as a mortgage or utility. Normally, the investigation takes less than thirty days.

We have had our issues with scammers. Some of the stories would make your blood boil.
 
911 said:
Here in Pennsylvania, a relative or even a non relative for that matter that is concerned that their elderly relative or friend is being scammed out of money, may intercede by collecting the e-mails or taped calls from the suspected scammer and take them to the DA's office. If he (the DA) is satisfied that this truly is a scam case, the DA can ask a judge to issue a subpoena to that relative's bank to have all withdraws halted until a further investigation may be completed. In the mean time, he (the judge) will appoint a guardian of the account for the purpose to only pay necessary bills, such as a mortgage or utility. Normally, the investigation takes less than thirty days.

We have had our issues with scammers. Some of the stories would make your blood boil.
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WHOA !!

Are you serious ??

Such a law is too government invasive and draconian considering the definition of "scammer" might be different for different people. What if an elderly person is sending money to a TV or radio preacher... or a political candidate... or organizations that protect animals. There could be abuse on both sides... abuse from individuals and organizations that solicit money... and abuse from intrusive government intervention against sending money to whomsoever you desire. What happened to privacy and personal responsibility ??
 
KingsX said:
WHOA !!

Are you serious ??

Such a law is too government invasive and draconian considering the definition of "scammer" might be different for different people. What if an elderly person is sending money to a TV or radio preacher... or a political candidate... or organizations that protect animals. There could be abuse on both sides... abuse from individuals and organizations that solicit money... and abuse from intrusive government intervention against sending money to whomsoever you desire. What happened to privacy and personal responsibility ??
Click to expand...


I agree....particularly with the last sentence.
 
rgp said:
I agree....particularly with the last sentence.
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Next the nanny state will tell you who to put in your will.

Ironically, this meshes with the "alone" topic. The nanny state wants you to have lots of close relatives and friends who will assist the government to mind your business. This makes all "loners", those who live alone and like it, potential enemies of the state.
 
I'm fairly sure I came close...joined one of the sites,was corresponding my email back and forth.
About the 2nd week in,he was going to Liberia to close out his recently deceased fathers businesses.
Ok,safe travels...a few days passed and I got email requests to send ITunes cards in 50.00 increments because there was an issue with internet access or some such thing.
I just closed the account at that site and never heard anymore,fortunately all our correspondence had been through the site,there was no personal info given out.
There seemed to be a rash of these encounters being investigated on the Dr.Phil show a few years back and it seemed like red flags were being thrown up a lot but were ignored.
 
Speaking of scammers, today I received a phone call from "Apple." I answered and was told that my Apple ID has been compromised. When I asked the caller for verification that he was from Apple, he skirted the issue. What put me off was that he knew my name! Ugh. I gave him no information and told him I would call Apple directly and get the details about my account.

I called Apple and they reiterated what I already knew... they DO NOT CALL their customers. So I blocked the phone number and reported the scam call. I am going to stop answering my phone altogether. :mad:
 
Ive been getting a lot of voice mails,because I dont answer unfamiliar numbers, that are saying that I owe some company money and if I dont contact them at the provided number in 45 minutes a warrant will be issued for my arrest...blah,blah,blah.
Its becoming pretty well known that this is some type of scam so they must be dreaming up a new one
 
I doubt if I'd ever use an online dating site, and if I did I'd be very wary of men who were contacting me until I was able to meet them and get to know them in person. I would take it as a red flag if they started mentioning anything about needing my money, or me to pay for their bills, etc. People should use some common sense in these things, and not be blinded by online "love", IMO.
 
.

I get a lot of calls that are dead silent after I say "hello."

If I say "hello" twice, I wake up the solicitor who is trying to sell me something.

So now, I either say "hello" once, then if there is silence, I hang up... or let my calls go to voicemail.
 
SeaBreeze said:
I doubt if I'd ever use an online dating site, and if I did I'd be very wary of men who were contacting me until I was able to meet them and get to know them in person. I would take it as a red flag if they started mentioning anything about needing my money, or me to pay for their bills, etc. People should use some common sense in these things, and not be blinded by online "love", IMO.
Click to expand...

Ditto that.

In my 30, 40s and 50s I did a lot of online dating, I had a blast, am still good friends with a couple of guys I met while I was in my 40s. We FB each other and sometimes talk on the phone, just for me, I didn't fall in love with them. Not saying there weren't some creeps and stalkers along the way, but, I had a whole lot of fun and met some terrific people. Just use good sense if you have it to begin with any one should be okay.

Plus, me and my money never part except for a really good clothing/shoe sale.
 
Pretty sure it seemed like a good idea at first.
I was widowed at 51 after being married 31 years,I wouldn't have begun to know how to go about meeting someone or dating.
Im also an introvert and wouldnt enjoy going to bars or large groups of people.
Sadly,the scammers figured out how to make easy money.
 
KingsX said:
.

I get a lot of calls that are dead silent after I say "hello."

If I say "hello" twice, I wake up the solicitor who is trying to sell me something.

So now, I either say "hello" once, then if there is silence, I hang up... or let my calls go to voicemail.
Click to expand...

That's because you are being "robo-dialed." They are churning out random phone numbers and when a person answers they connect them to the telemarketer. Hence the pause after you say hello.
 
KingsX said:
WHOA !!

Are you serious ??

Such a law is too government invasive and draconian considering the definition of "scammer" might be different for different people. What if an elderly person is sending money to a TV or radio preacher... or a political candidate... or organizations that protect animals. There could be abuse on both sides... abuse from individuals and organizations that solicit money... and abuse from intrusive government intervention against sending money to whomsoever you desire. What happened to privacy and personal responsibility ??
Click to expand...

Privacy died long ago. I just got approved for a credit card online in about 15 seconds. What gave millions of people the right to film other citizens doing whatever? There re camers everywhere> Remember when it was an issue? Dead now!!
 
C'est Moi said:
That's because you are being "robo-dialed." They are churning out random phone numbers and when a person answers they connect them to the telemarketer. Hence the pause after you say hello.
Click to expand...


Yup. I know not to say hello twice... because whoever it is, only wants my money.
 
fmdog44 said:
Privacy died long ago. I just got approved for a credit card online in about 15 seconds. What gave millions of people the right to film other citizens doing whatever? There re camers everywhere> Remember when it was an issue? Dead now!!
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Who gave the three big credit companies the right to horde everyone's financial info...
so hackers can access it like an all-you-can-eat buffet. I hope there is a class action
suit against Equifax who was responsible for millions of stolen SS numbers.
 
fmdog44 said:
Privacy died long ago. I just got approved for a credit card online in about 15 seconds. What gave millions of people the right to film other citizens doing whatever? There re camers everywhere> Remember when it was an issue? Dead now!!
Click to expand...




"There re camers everywhere> Remember when it was an issue? Dead now!!"

 It died in the name of security....
 
The U.S. government doesn't help, either. I think I wrote about this already, but it's worth repeating:

A short while ago, I got an official-looking email from HHS telling me that if I hadn't received my new Medicare card, I should call a number they gave me. I called the number, and was connected pretty quickly to a nice, friendly person who asked for my SSN, my age, my address, and other information. They said they would send out a second card.

It wasn't until a few days later that I suddenly realized that it could have all been a scam. I was horrified. I answered all their questions because technically, I had called them, not the other way around. But how did I know who I was calling?

Thank God, it turned out to be on the level. It really was the government, that really was the Medicare phone number, and I did receive a new card. So I was lucky. But with all the warnings being issued to people, what is the government doing getting people to cooperate with this kind of questioning over the phone? What is to stop the scammers and phishers from using this exact same technique?
 
Back to topic -

Online dating scams have been in the news for many years. I've seen lots of stories on Dateline, Dr. Phil, etc. One woman in her 50s lost her entire inheritance $400,000 to an online "lover" but I found it hard to feel sorry for her. When the other person starts asking for loans/money anyone with an ounce of common sense will shut them down, cease contact, and run in the opposite direction.
 
Giantsfan1954 said:
Pretty sure it seemed like a good idea at first.
I was widowed at 51 after being married 31 years,I wouldn't have begun to know how to go about meeting someone or dating.
Im also an introvert and wouldnt enjoy going to bars or large groups of people.
Sadly,the scammers figured out how to make easy money.
Click to expand...

Come to think of it, by the time I turned 54, the pickings weren't so great mainly for me, I think it had to do a lot more in change in geographical area. That thing about southern men, well at least for me and many women I know, turned out to be a myth. Once I moved south, I was meeting nothing but the jerkiest of the bunch. Either it was a lot of married men, wanting someone on the side, some posing as single, some wanting spousal equivalent in the form of slave labor, you know, barefoot, bent over and in the kitchen sort of thing or just a plaything period. That's about the time I said no more dating for me. I like my own company just fine.

Plus, I still had and on and off relationship going with one of my exes who I'm still friends with to this day, just no love spark on my end. Now we're just forever friends and nothing more.

I get it, I'm not a social butterfly in that, I don't make the rounds in a room, likely to sit in one place most of the time. I wouldn't dream of going out somewhere just to meet a man in any social environment for dating. I'm not the easiest person to talk to under those circumstances if I think someone is hitting on me anyway.
 

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