75 and in retirement community. Most everyone here looks 85 and on walkers.

Tara said:
Hi. I am a 75 year old woman just joined a retirement community. Most people here are about 85. And on walkers. They are nice enough. But it is a little sad and depressing. I look young for my age. And they think it is a big deal because I wear makeup. The black maids do not like me. Some people resent me here. It is for62 and up. Nonprofit continue g care. I am pretty healthy and in independent living. I keep wondering where the people in their 60;s. And 70s are.
It is like twilight zone here. I think I should be in the 55 age and up age range.

The place is pretty and hi tech though. I have a nice apartment and tv .it is pa. It is so hard after losing my house and my brother.
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I hear you loud and clear. I too live in a 55 plus apartment. The place was built 10 years ago and it is full of "little ole' ladies" in their 80s. Walkers are a dime a dozen. Everyone has one. I'm 75 and I look like a spring chicken around here. I walk the hallways 5 days/week and try not to scare the ladies as they are pushing their walkers along. I wouldn't worry if some people don't like you. They probably don't like themselves.
 

HarryHawk said:
I think it depends on where in the lifecycle a community happens to be. We are looking forward to moving into a brand new, yet to be built senior community. There have been a number of mixers at which we met many of our future neighbors. The folks all seem to be in their late 60's or early 70's.

Of course, since most if not all intend to make this their last move, 10 or 15 years from now most of the community will be mid to late 80's (God willing). They will have spent the elapsed 10 or 15 years forming their circle of friends. Someone younger moving in might not be able to quickly fit into the then existing community.

In many existing communities, the only time there is an opening is when one of the old existing residents pass.
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This was true in my mom's case. She moved into her FLA condo in the mid 70's when it was new. As time passed, and as the original owners passed away, she had less and less interaction with the new people, who were quite a bit younger.
 
Lavinia said:
One of the problems with being surrounded by less able people is that they expect you to do things for them...such as shopping. Take care or they will quickly take you for granted.
You have the security of being in a community but at the same time you want to be independant. Think of your home as being just somewhere to live and make a social life outside the complex. Don't restrict yourself to life inside the community....I'm sure you are under no obligation to do so.
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welcometothegroupcup.gif
 
There is a difference , at least here in Canada, between Retirement Residences( big bucks) and Retirement Communities (known as Senior Buildings). ...more affordable but you have to get on a waiting list and that can take a very long time as people have to die off or go in to long term care before there is a vacancy.

It is still possible as I explained previously to live in regular apartment building with all the mod cons..like, gyms, saunas, party rooms BBq's etc to enjoy and I think one should until it reaches that point where the normal chores of living become somewhat tough.

I use a walker and there really is no problem with them as the doors are automatically geared to open on approach. The younger people in my building enjoy all that too as they have shopping carts to manipulate and not all young people are 100% fit. We , the older ones , are happy to have assistance offered if necessary by the younger tenants and they are happy to do it.

just my tuppence worth..
 
JB in SC said:
There was an article about small house mixed age communities (IIRC, in the PNW), younger residents helping older residents, older residents helping younger residents. Both age groups can benefit from each other's knowledge.

The "working and retired adults only" mentioned by @officerripley sounds like a pretty good idea.
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Yes, there are already established organizations matching up younger and older people. I also think it is a good idea.

https://www.multiculturalcaregiving.net/elderly-roommates/
 
Tara said:
The black maids do not like me. Some people resent me here.
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Whaaaat? :mad: What about the white maids?:mad: Do they like you?

Some people resent you? Sounds more like you resent them because they don't wear makeup and they use walkers. Oh. And maybe because they're POC.

Doesn't sound like a good fit. If you haven't bought your apartment, perhaps you should look for a place more in keeping with what you view as your Station in Life.
 
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Hi Tara. I am also 75 and have been living in an assisted living for a year. Not bragging, but I ama young looking 75 and do get attention. So far I am 75% happy. I am in good health, walk outside about 4 miles everyday. My apartment is nice and the facility is upgrade too. Most everyone here is in their 80’s, a few in 90’s and one who just turned 100. There are about 10 my age. I am close with only about five or six who are without walkers. I have no one who can walk with me. It does get depressing sometimes when someone dies or gets sicker.

I am thinking about buying a car so I can get out more on my own when and where I want. I now depend on my daughters and Grandchildren for transportation. I cannot stand waiting for someone to pick me up, on their schedule.

Cold weather has depressed me. I am hoping my mood will be more upbeat when spring arrives. But I do think I will seriously think about moving to a more younger community soon.
 
Tara said:
Hi. I am a 75 year old woman just joined a retirement community. Most people here are about 85. And on walkers. They are nice enough. But it is a little sad and depressing. I look young for my age. And they think it is a big deal because I wear makeup. The black maids do not like me. Some people resent me here. It is for62 and up. Nonprofit continue g care. I am pretty healthy and in independent living. I keep wondering where the people in their 60;s. And 70s are.
It is like twilight zone here. I think I should be in the 55 age and up age range.

The place is pretty and hi tech though. I have a nice apartment and tv .it is pa. It is so hard after losing my house and my brother.
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Sounds like high school!
 
I thought I knew how I'd like to spend my golden years (if I'm blessed to live that long). I assumed it would be in a retirement community that had multi-level care... independent living all the way to end of life. What I had not realized was that there are many different flavors and highly variable costs. So I began doing some research albeit not exhaustive, yet. But what I knew from the onset was that I had to be true to who I am which is someone who would not fit well in a community that was too high energy and interactive (I'm an introvert) but would does enjoy the company of others periodically.

I limited my research to places on the east coast of the US since that is where most of my family are and there were no shortage of options. The one that I truly think would be wonderful is too far from anything I can afford but since I hope to not have to move for at least 10 years (I'm currently 66), I leave open the option for a financial windfall 😅 between now and then.
 
richard_saunders said:
Sounds like high school!
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Exactly like high school. I hadn’t thought about my situation like that. Here in my assisted living, there are little cliques and more popular ones. The staff has their favorite residents. We have one lady who plays games and drama with everyone. Some get jealous when they don’t get their picture on our Facebook site. Some are toxic. You just have to stay away from them. Yep, just like high school.😂😂
 
Hi. You guys are great. I am doing okay. This retirement community is really a nice place. It is hard to make close friends though. I do not like crowds. I do not drive . I have no family left and my friends are gone. I have only 2 ladies outside the building in my town who are friends and they help me out a lot.
I would like to have some friends in my town to go out for dinner sometimes. Some social life. My town is not far from here.
Life seems pretty empty.
I did not see a place for 55. and over. I do not think moving would be good. I will always miss my brother.
 
Life has caught you by surprise....the trick is to surprise Life back! Give it time, wear a smile and be as friendly as you can. Do not complain out loud, and you will find others, regardless of their age, are in the same boat as you. Enjoy the life you have.
 


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