I'm considering joining a Senior dating site for over 60's.. ..it's not that I want to find a long term relationship... I would just like to find a casual friend basically... Nowdays there's no going down the pub or to a dance hall and meeting a guy like we did in our youth.. and now o/h's been gone almost 2 years it's time for me to start thinking about having a bit of a life before I get too much older... but I have no experience of dating sites per se.. except for some of the horror stories you read about people meeting weirdos and potential axe murderers...
So.. has anyone joined a dating site.. what were your experiences.. and thoughts..
Yes - I have current experience. I signed up for Silver Singles and then half way through asked them to switch me to their sister site, Elite Singles. It didn't matter because they share their members. At first, I was getting some interesting matches, but now, six months in and as my subscription is expiring, all I'm getting are scammers.
The profiles over the past couple of months have been (1) different names and cities but identical profiles, (2) 7 or more members named Ulrich (really? yes - it's a German company so I think the company is making up profiles), (3) people who do not meet my criteria - at all. When I first started, I got 10 matches a day, now I get only 3 and at least two of them are fake profiles.
I spoke with a guy last week who is halfway between an individual site member and a matchmaker (his business is that he takes over your profile and communications for you), and he said the site with the most members is Match.com. I think Match may let you search - the site I have been on does not - they decide for you who you will see.
My criteria were really stringent and I immediately discarded 95% of the matches they sent. I chatted with half of the remaining and ended up meeting only a few who appeared to meet my criteria on paper. I've told my friends some of the experiences I had, and some of them are quite funny - material for a book? (For example - the guy who gave me all his clothing sizes - was I supposed to buy him a new wardrobe?
Or the judge who just could not take no for an answer after he told me he was in an intimate relationship with someone else - I think judges are accustomed to having the last word.) But I have not met or chatted with anyone who I felt even the beginning of a connection with. Something that is quite typical of the online sites is that you will often be ghosted, or "breadcrumbed" - a new term for me.
You need to have a healthy sense of self to do this (having someone block you for no reason at all - even when it's immediately after they've given you their email address and asked to communicate off-site) is no fun at all. Nor is it fun to meet someone, like the person, and never hear from him again. And it's also hard when you have to tell someone who wants to see you again that you don't think there's a connection (because I hate to hurt other's feelings).
So much more about these sites, but this is what comes to mind immediately. I haven't given up yet - I'm going to take some time off, get some professional pictures, and maybe hire the guy I spoke with. My attitude now is "go big or go home." (I am, however, going on vacation in a couple of months and perhaps I'll meet someone on the plane.
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