Behaviors of Emotionally Immature People

David777 said:
Was predictable as someone new to this board that I've made critical comments about your posts on other threads including warning other members not to feed some of your posts on earlier threads as troll-like that after you were never able to bait me after several tries, into responding, that frustrated, you'd eventually begin to make personal attacks.
Click to expand...

I just wanted to say thanks for gatekeeping for everyone here. What would we ever do if you weren't here to warn us what to, and how to, respond to other members' post?

Don't bother to reply. I won't see it.
 

Being the youngest of eight children, the closest one five years older, I think my emotional maturity was affected. The closest five siblings were sisters.
Being the "runt" I was tussled and tossed but doted on none the less.
It leaves a frustration when I can't get my way but an ability to wrestle through life.
Looking at those fourteen examples. I don't see one that is obvious but a few that are bordering on my behavior. I can be self-centered. That one is a yes. But I can also be altruistic.

I guess like @Pepper I can just be a pain in the ass. That one's for sure.
 

David777 said:
Will suggest other members also identify any others on threads, that likewise emotionally post in troll like ways, because as noted, IGNORING THEM, is what they dislike most regardless of how much they will try emotionally baiting those they disagree with or how easily one might negate their predictably expected defensive arguments or how much they twist yours. Trolls posting tend dig their own obvious holes, become bored, notice their inputs are generally disagreed with, and go elsewhere without needing to be pushed by others. So, DON'T FEED TROLLS or be baited into responding.
Click to expand...
By far the best policy!
 
hearlady said:
Looking at those fourteen examples. I don't see one that is obvious but a few that are bordering on my behavior. I can be self-centered. That one is a yes. But I can also be altruistic.

I guess like @Pepper I can just be a pain in the ass. That one's for sure.
Click to expand...
Everyone is self-centered. You are, after all, the only one who lives in your head with you.
 
hearlady said:
I wouldn't either. I doubt @Paco Dennis would either. I think it was a joke.
Click to expand...
Well, to put this mystery to rest. I have said and would say again worse than "buzz off", when I get mad at someone for being a jerk I will tell them. But I have never gotten in a fight over anything. Diplomacy sometimes gets cut off, doesn't mean it ends there either. I would always try to find a way to be friends, or acquaintances...and be free to be free. :)
 
David777 said:
Was predictable as someone new to this board that I've made critical comments about your posts on other threads including warning other members not to feed some of your posts on earlier threads as troll-like that after you were never able to bait me after several tries, into responding, that frustrated, you'd eventually begin to make personal attacks.
Click to expand...
Hmmmmm. A very interesting point regarding emotionally immature reflection. :unsure:
Dave03 said:
I just wanted to say thanks for gatekeeping for everyone here. What would we ever do if you weren't here to warn us what to, and how to, respond to other members' post?
Click to expand...
I must confess that I too have been struggling with that very problem. I can’t even count the number of sleepless nights I’ve had not knowing how to respond or even if I should react at all. The problem borders on developing into a phobia but I think the afore-mentioned gatekeeper has it all sorted out very nicely. :love:
Dave03 said:
Don't bother to reply. I won't see it.
Click to expand...
But you’ll miss out on the updates. :confused:
 
What drives people to be so hostile?

Back to the psychiatrist's emotional immaturity example list...
6. Emotionally reactive in the extreme. Yelling, snapping, a temper tantrum, name-calling, shaming, pouting, refusing to speak.
7. People who seek revenge and/or say, “I don’t get mad, I get even.

I enjoy how well ignoring trolls and not engaging them in discussion has been so effective on this board including those obviously emotionally frustrated baiters in this thread that serves as evidence as this person enjoys peacefulness in this community. DON'T FEED TROLLS!
 
Last edited:
This theory is from a book by an established psychologist who does therapy with children of emotionally immature
parents. Mentioned in New york Times this month. These are not strict only guidelines to check off. I suspect members see themselves here. But these are extreme cases she writes about It has nothing to do with superiority complex. The word immature is is not so apt
My mother was like this her whole life with us but not her friends or relatives. Except much worse. My father less so. Everything
annoyed them, any word or gesture and she went crazy. People tend to read themselves or family as examples but this may be inaccurate
 
Prone to emotional outbursts and/or reactions? There's a lot of fine lines and gaps in 'maturity' to begin with sometimes lacking the experience needed to gain wisdom which allows for more rational decision making.

They say the age addicts and alcoholics start using heavily or regularity stunts their maturity because so much time/thought is spent on their high
 
WhatInThe said:
Prone to emotional outbursts and/or reactions? There's a lot of fine lines and gaps in 'maturity' to begin with sometimes lacking the experience needed to gain wisdom which allows for more rational decision making.

They say the age addicts and alcoholics start using heavily or regularity stunts their maturity because so much time/thought is spent on their high
Click to expand...
It didn't hurt Van Gogh, Hemingway, Grant, or Steven King?
 
David777 said:
Brief points at this psychology link provide a good summary of common behaviors of emotionally immature people. One is more likely to encounter such people in non-professional and working class environments because in corporate workplaces they won't likely succeed. Personally, I tend to avoid overly emotional others.

7 Mistakes That Emotionally Immature People Often Make, According to Psychologists
snippets:

1. Not Communicating Well

Trying to communicate about something important with someone who is emotionally immature can be a hassle and can be one of the reasons why their relationships don’t usually last very long due to the confusion that arises.

“An emotionally immature person often struggles to understand their own feelings and those of others,” Dixon states. “This lack of insight can lead to confusion about their emotional experiences and hinder their ability to communicate effectively. When someone is unaware of how their emotions affect their behavior, it can create misunderstandings in relationships.”

2. Becoming Overly Clingy

While it’s nice being in a relationship with someone who wants to be around you, emotionally immature people sometimes take it to the next level of clinginess because oftentimes, they don’t like to give someone they’re in a relationship much space.

“They become easily attached to people,” Ramsey reveals. “They might become overly clingy because they don’t know how to be without that person.”

3. Rigid Thinking

It’s very difficult to get an emotionally immature person to see any other viewpoint than their own. Because of the fact that they tend to be very black and white about things and always think they are right, maintaining a healthy relationship is very hard.

“A person who exhibits rigid thinking is unable to consider alternative perspectives or adapt their views. This inflexibility can lead to a narrow understanding of situations and magnify their own emotional experiences, making it difficult for them to manage their feelings effectively,” Dixon shares.

4. Reacting Poorly to Criticism

No matter if you’re pointing something out causally or bluntly telling an emotionally immature person something they did wrong, they won’t have a good reaction.

“They don’t take feedback well,” Ramsey explains. “You can share something with them, even if it’s true, and they still won’t accept it. Because of that, it’s hard to have a relationship with them because you can’t really tell them anything.”

5. Being Self-Centered

“An emotionally immature individual often displays self-centered behavior, showing little regard for others’ feelings or experiences,” Dixon tells Parade. “This focus on themselves can blind them to the emotional needs of those around them, making it hard to form meaningful connections.”

6. Becoming Easily Angry

While it’s natural to get upset in certain situations, a person who is emotionally immature gets mad a lot more than normal, which is a mistake they make that is really hard to navigate when you’re dating them.

“A person who is emotionally immature, will get mad over the slightest things,” Ramsey warns. “They can’t regulate their emotions.”

7. Not Knowing How To Show Empathy

Having a relationship of any kind with an emotionally immature person can be difficult because they aren’t able to connect with people the same way and sympathize with them in situations.
Click to expand...
I'd say that there are millions of people like this. It's partly genetic, and family learned behavior and socia/societal learning. That's why psychologists get so many clients and make big bucks.
 
Paco Dennis said:
It didn't hurt Van Gogh, Hemingway, Grant, or Steven King?
Click to expand...
I guess you mean it did not hurt their fame??? Not sure what you are trying to say there. Both Van Gough and Hemingway were arguably insane. Not sure what Grant you are refering to. Steven King's story is not complete. They, and people close to them were hurt.
 
DebraMae said:
I guess you mean it did not hurt their fame??? Not sure what you are trying to say there. Both Van Gough and Hemingway were arguably insane. Not sure what Grant you are refering to. Steven King's story is not complete. They, and people close to them were hurt.
Click to expand...
Sorry Debra, I should have not said that. I need to stay away from this type of thread.
 
While web searching for the current married divorce thread came upon this excellent long listing of emotional intelligence issues. For each, the author has a paragraph or three of input. These are not black and white issues and may not at all be valid depending on situations so read intelligently. And indeed again, I personally view significant numbers of adults I tend to flow away from, as being overly emotional lacking a level of emotional social intelligence, even those with otherwise higher IQ intelligence.

10+ Signs You Have No Emotional Intelligence
By James Haikney

should be:
Signs You Have No lack some Emotional Intelligence
  1. Difficulty in Reading Body Language
  2. Quick to Judge Others' Feelings
  3. Often Offending Others Unintentionally
  4. Inability to Handle Criticism
  5. Frequent Misunderstandings in Conversations
  6. Struggling with Empathy
  7. Ignoring Emotional Cues
  8. Struggling to Manage Your Own Emotions
  9. Becoming Defensive Easily
  10. Difficulty in Maintaining Friendships
  11. Often Feel Misunderstood
  12. Unaware of How Your Mood Affects Others
  13. Having Trouble Comforting Others
  14. Frequently Interrupting Others
  15. Difficulty in Expressing Your Feelings
  16. Not Recognizing When It's Time to Apologize
  17. Trouble with Conflict Resolution
  18. Tendency to Monopolize Conversations
  19. Failing to Recognize Sarcasm
  20. Unable to Recognize Tension in a Room
  21. Difficulty in Adapting to Social Situations
  22. Reacting Inappropriately to Jokes
  23. Struggling to Offer Sympathy
  24. Unaware of Personal Boundaries
  25. Overreacting to Small Issues
  26. Being Disconnected from Your Own Feelings
  27. Frequently Feeling Overwhelmed by Emotions
  28. Inability to See Things from Others' Perspectives
  29. Struggling with Emotional Self-Control
  30. Tendency to Blame Others for Your Feeling
  31. Difficulty in Reading Between the Lines
  32. Often Misinterpreting Situations
  33. Poor Listener
  34. Resistant to Change
  35. Inability to Recognize Others' Needs
  36. Ignoring Emotional Well-being
  37. Struggling with Introspection
  38. Being Judgmental of Others' Reactions
  39. Expecting Others to Understand Your Feelings Automatically
  40. Avoiding Emotional Discussions
  41. Rigid Thinking Patterns
  42. Overly Logical in Emotional Situations
  43. Lacking Motivation to Improve Emotional Awareness
  44. Inconsistent Emotional Reactions
  45. Unaware of Subtle Social Norms
  46. Overwhelmed in Large Social Gatherings
  47. Rarely Offering Emotional Support
  48. Avoiding Eye Contact
  49. Struggling to Build Rapport
  50. Being Inflexible with Plans
  51. Reacting with Anger Instead of Understanding
  52. Avoiding Responsibility for Emotional Impact
  53. Finding it Difficult to Trust Others
  54. Ignoring Non-Verbal Signals
  55. Resistance to Feedback
  56. Difficulty in Admitting Mistakes
  57. Frequently Miscommunicating
  58. Being Dismissive of Others' Concerns
  59. Failing to Recognize Emotional Triggers
  60. Struggling with Patience in Emotional Situations
  61. Often Feeling Detached from Others
  62. Having a Limited Emotional Vocabulary
  63. Inability to Provide Constructive Feedback
  64. Failing to Recognize Your Own Biases
  65. Overly Critical of Others' Emotional Expression
  66. Feeling Threatened by Others' Emotions
  67. Avoiding Deep Conversations
  68. Being Unpredictable in Emotional Reactions
  69. Struggling to Adapt Emotionally to Change
  70. Tendency to Manipulate Emotions to Control Situations
 
Last edited:
David777 said:
While web searching for the current married divorce thread came upon this excellent long listing of emotional intelligence issues. For each, the author has a paragraph or three of input. These are not black and white issues and may not at all be valid depending on situations so read intelligently. And indeed again, I personally view significant numbers of adults I tend to flow away from, as being overly emotional lacking a level of emotional social intelligence, even those with otherwise higher IQ intelligence.

10+ Signs You Have No Emotional Intelligence
By James Haikney

should be:
Signs You Have No lack some Emotional Intelligence

10+ Signs You Have No Lack Emotional Intelligence

  1. Difficulty in Reading Body Language
  2. Quick to Judge Others' Feelings
  3. Often Offending Others Unintentionally
  4. Inability to Handle Criticism
  5. Frequent Misunderstandings in Conversations
  6. Struggling with Empathy
  7. Ignoring Emotional Cues
  8. Struggling to Manage Your Own Emotions
  9. Becoming Defensive Easily
  10. Difficulty in Maintaining Friendships
  11. Often Feel Misunderstood
  12. Unaware of How Your Mood Affects Others
  13. Having Trouble Comforting Others
  14. Frequently Interrupting Others
  15. Difficulty in Expressing Your Feelings
  16. Not Recognizing When It's Time to Apologize
  17. Trouble with Conflict Resolution
  18. Tendency to Monopolize Conversations
  19. Failing to Recognize Sarcasm
  20. Unable to Recognize Tension in a Room
  21. Difficulty in Adapting to Social Situations
  22. Reacting Inappropriately to Jokes
  23. Struggling to Offer Sympathy
  24. Unaware of Personal Boundaries
  25. Overreacting to Small Issues
  26. Being Disconnected from Your Own Feelings
  27. Frequently Feeling Overwhelmed by Emotions
  28. Inability to See Things from Others' Perspectives
  29. Struggling with Emotional Self-Control
  30. Tendency to Blame Others for Your Feeling
  31. Difficulty in Reading Between the Lines
  32. Often Misinterpreting Situations
  33. Poor Listener
  34. Resistant to Change
  35. Inability to Recognize Others' Needs
  36. Ignoring Emotional Well-being
  37. Struggling with Introspection
  38. Being Judgmental of Others' Reactions
  39. Expecting Others to Understand Your Feelings Automatically
  40. Avoiding Emotional Discussions
  41. Rigid Thinking Patterns
  42. Overly Logical in Emotional Situations
  43. Lacking Motivation to Improve Emotional Awareness
  44. Inconsistent Emotional Reactions
  45. Unaware of Subtle Social Norms
  46. Overwhelmed in Large Social Gatherings
  47. Rarely Offering Emotional Support
  48. Avoiding Eye Contact
  49. Struggling to Build Rapport
  50. Being Inflexible with Plans
  51. Reacting with Anger Instead of Understanding
  52. Avoiding Responsibility for Emotional Impact
  53. Finding it Difficult to Trust Others
  54. Ignoring Non-Verbal Signals
  55. Resistance to Feedback
  56. Difficulty in Admitting Mistakes
  57. Frequently Miscommunicating
  58. Being Dismissive of Others' Concerns
  59. Failing to Recognize Emotional Triggers
  60. Struggling with Patience in Emotional Situations
  61. Often Feeling Detached from Others
  62. Having a Limited Emotional Vocabulary
  63. Inability to Provide Constructive Feedback
  64. Failing to Recognize Your Own Biases
  65. Overly Critical of Others' Emotional Expression
  66. Feeling Threatened by Others' Emotions
  67. Avoiding Deep Conversations
  68. Being Unpredictable in Emotional Reactions
  69. Struggling to Adapt Emotionally to Change
  70. Tendency to Manipulate Emotions to Control Situations
Click to expand...
I have all 70 of these "descriptors". So I definitely lack some emotional intelligence. :(
 

You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top