Depression

grahamg

grahamg

Old codger
Location
South of Manchester, UK
Just thought I'd start a thread on the subject of depression (hope this doesn't depress anyone of course).

I have some direct knowledge of the topic but wanted to hand over to forum members first, before I say too much myself.

If its possible to make it a dispassionate, even light hearted thread so much the better :D.
 

Me and my shadow!

Many, many years ago a doctor told me that I "suffered" from depression. I've never really been sure, I know I'm definitely an introvert and need time alone to recharge my batteries. I believe that what I have must be a mild form of depression because I have been able to make friends with it. I learned early on to power through my bouts of depression by focusing on the needs of others. Since I've retired I've sort of given into it and become more reclusive. I still need to have a talk with myself from time to time. hitch up your draws!, soldier on!, put one foot in front of the other!, etc... It works for me.
 
On another forum I started same thread

On another forum I started the same thread and received some quite heart rending responses - so not much levity, as maybe was to be expected.

One guy, who said like yourself that he'd only suffered a mild form of depression did come back with a joke: "I seem to think of someone and then next thing they telephone me - but my friend and I have decided I'm psychotic not psychic......." (well I thought it was funny, and you can probably imagine it did lift the thread which was in danger of becoming overwhelmingly sad).

Here is a photo of my grandson - I used this on the other forum too as a way possibly of making everyone feel uplifted:
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Adorable grandson, you must be so proud of that sweetie! :love_heart: Cute outfit too!

I've been fortunate not to have ever suffered from depression, but like almost everyone, if not everyone, there are times when I felt down in the dumps or in a slump for various reasons. When this happens to me, I usually can turn it around by putting things in perspective. I think of all the people in the world who have it so much worse than I ever have, whose body or minds are negatively affected by disease, birth defects or accidents and abuse. Also those whose children are stricken with these devastating challenges in life. Pretty quickly, I count my blessings and find many reasons to feel happy, not sad.
 
I get that reaction quite a lot to the young man's photo and it is the fact he seems so happy that is the most rewarding aspect of being his granddad (I wonder how many hearts he'll break too...........?).

You do sound very balanced in your approach to life and I'm sure everything you say must help avoid depression. Nonetheless it still keeps happening to so many of us, it makes you question what's going on. Genetic factors were mentioned on the other forum and it is true my mother suffered a number of bouts of depression in her lifetime. I can't try to examine everything too much myself though because when I started recovering those professionals aiding me had to ask me what I thought had made the difference, so even they didn't know. It is a great blessing to feel well after so much of the other side of things and now I'm seemingly able to cope with all manner of obstacles being thrown in my way (like half my immediate family trying to evict me from the family farm). I felt absolutely certain when I was ill that I would never be better again, regardless of how many people told me otherwise. One professional did say I shouldn't expect to get back entirely to how I was before when I had a reasonably successful career - so she hadn't too much faith in me had she. However, I can honestly say to those who have asked me recently that I am happy on the farm doing my work now, and that's a feeling I probably couldn't have said with complete conviction for the majority of my life.
 
grahamg said:
You do sound very balanced in your approach to life and I'm sure everything you say must help avoid depression. Nonetheless it still keeps happening to so many of us, it makes you question what's going on. Genetic factors were mentioned on the other forum and it is true my mother suffered a number of bouts of depression in her lifetime. I can't try to examine everything too much myself though because when I started recovering those professionals aiding me had to ask me what I thought had made the difference, so even they didn't know. It is a great blessing to feel well after so much of the other side of things and now I'm seemingly able to cope with all manner of obstacles being thrown in my way (like half my immediate family trying to evict me from the family farm).
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I know it happens to many people, probably the cause is too involved to pinpoint one thing, but I've heard also that genetic factors may come into play. I've known folks who have been on anti-depressant drugs that constantly needed to have their doses increased or have their prescriptions changed. Then there's others who've had some good result with natural remedies like St. John's Wort or or other supplements/vitamins/light-boxes, but their depression wasn't so severe. Glad you're doing better now and able to cope with many of the things that life throws your way.
 
One of the things that triggers depression for me is sugar. I eat something sugary, the blood sugar spikes and then it drops. Then comes the depression. Lack of sleep does it too. I've had a hard time sleeping since parimenopause. I exercise, it helps ward it off. When it hits I try not to allow myself to wallow in it. I refuse to take drugs for it. They have destroyed two of my cousins lives. Instead of getting out of bad marriages, they took anti-depressants and stayed in the marriages. They are now in one heck of a bad state. I take myself by the seat of the pants and give myself a good kick. Plus, I write my novels and work out whatever is bothering me. We may not be able to control all the events in our lives, but I can control the lives of my characters.
 
Phoenix said:
I take myself by the seat of the pants and give myself a good kick. Plus, I write my novels and work out whatever is bothering me. We may not be able to control all the events in our lives, but I can control the lives of my characters.
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I liked your comments - they made me laugh and I guess what you're describing really does help you too.

Thanks for the response to the thread.
 
Something that has helped me from the darkside...

A There are folks who have survived suicide attempts who talk about the "Moment of Clarity". Just before your brain shuts down you have this moment of realization...&%$#, whatever has put me here isn't really the end of the world wait...

B Suicide is in a nutshell a selfish act. I'm not talking about a terminal illness or if you have no survivors. But really look at the Hemingway family. Grandpa couldn't deal with getting old so he offed himself. Grand daughter did it with pills. No you do not want a legacy like that %$#&.
 
fureverywhere said:
Something that has helped me from the dark side...

B Suicide is in a nutshell a selfish act.
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It is good to hear success stories like yours and I agree with you on suicide being selfish (though some may not get the "moment of clarity" you describe to prevent their actions unfortunately).
 
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My doc says most real depression is caused by an imbalance in neurotransmitters in the brain and is chemical in origin. Talking about real clinical depression, not situational depression caused by something bad happening in your life.
 
grahamg said:
I liked your comments - they made me laugh and I guess what you're describing really does help you too.

Thanks for the response to the thread.
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My dad always dealt with things by joking. It beats the heck out of swimming in the cesspool. I've had some really crappy things happen to me over the period of my life. And sometimes they really do get me down. Doctors who talk about the chemical imbalances often prescribe drugs for the issue which makes things worse. I will not go there. What we all do is up to us, but we should not think that shooting ourselves in the foot is the answer, and that's what drug therapy is, a shot in the foot which destroys the beauty inside and our potential to learn how to rise above whatever the issue is.
 
Butterfly said:
My doc says most real depression is caused by an imbalance in neurotransmitters in the brain and is chemical in origin. Talking about real clinical depression, not situational depression caused by something bad happening in your life.
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See post #2 in this thread.

There's more I'd like to add to the thread, just haven't gotten a_round_tuit.

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My dad always dealt with things by joking. It beats the heck out of swimming in the cesspool.

Your Dad is correct. Finding humor in the darkest crap is a lifesaver. Hubby has Parkinson's and more feeble by the year. I can say with a straight face "Okay son, it's your turn to walk Callie. Hold the leash and your feet will never touch the ground". My daughter is exceptional but I can still joke I'm feeling retarded as she shows me how the TV remote works.

Oh and grandchildren...holding my boy and watching him chortle at Grandma's shiny bracelets. Yep I can hang on several more years.
 
Following the Channel 4 programme on Bruce Springsteen talking about his depression here is a link to a BBC documentary shown last night on the subject of loneliness and mostly concentrating on anxiety and depression:

~http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b06vkhr5/the-age-of-loneliness
 
Just discovered Meatloaf, the rock singer says he's suffered from depression and had nervous breakdowns:

~In a separate video answering questions for Facebook fans, Meat Loaf talked about the meaning of being a celebrity and said that he’s not about that or being a “rock star.”
He says “I don’t really relate to myself in any form or fashion as any kind of star. And that’s what I had a nervous breakdown about, because they kept putting out ‘new star’ and I kept saying to the Epic people, do not put the word ‘star’ in an advertisement, put ‘artist,’ put ‘performer,’ put anything but ‘star,’ because that’s not what I’m about.”
Elaborating on the point, Meat Loaf commented “I don’t go to where paparazzi is, because I really don’t care about being a celebrity or a rock star, not my thing. I like doing my shows, I like doing acting, but you can have the celebrity. I like the craft, I like the skill, I like making it better and I like how we put it together.”


Read More: Meat Loaf Says Being Labeled a Star Gave Him a Nervous Breakdown | http://ultimateclassicrock.com/meat-loaf-new-album-update/?trackback=tsmclip
 
Sometimes depression is a side effect of Hashimoto illness (thyroid problem). My cousin, a very successful person, nearly starved herself to death (she lost interest in everything) before her problem was diagnosed. Now she is takes proper meds for glands and is back to her old style of life.
 
grahamg said:
Just discovered Meatloaf, the rock singer says he's suffered from depression and had nervous breakdowns:

~In a separate video answering questions for Facebook fans, Meat Loaf talked about the meaning of being a celebrity and said that he’s not about that or being a “rock star.”
He says “I don’t really relate to myself in any form or fashion as any kind of star. And that’s what I had a nervous breakdown about, because they kept putting out ‘new star’ and I kept saying to the Epic people, do not put the word ‘star’ in an advertisement, put ‘artist,’ put ‘performer,’ put anything but ‘star,’ because that’s not what I’m about.”
Elaborating on the point, Meat Loaf commented “I don’t go to where paparazzi is, because I really don’t care about being a celebrity or a rock star, not my thing. I like doing my shows, I like doing acting, but you can have the celebrity. I like the craft, I like the skill, I like making it better and I like how we put it together.”


Read More: Meat Loaf Says Being Labeled a Star Gave Him a Nervous Breakdown | http://ultimateclassicrock.com/meat-loaf-new-album-update/?trackback=tsmclip
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This makes me respect him a lot. He's the true artist. I love that. He's not a high maintenance person who is stuck on himself. I find that refreshing.
 
Phoenix said:
This makes me respect him a lot. He's the true artist. I love that. He's not a high maintenance person who is stuck on himself. I find that refreshing.
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I have always thought the same way about Meatloaf, and his breakdown story has the ring of truth about it lasting two years when he wasn't able to function.
 
grahamg said:
I have always thought the same way about Meatloaf, and his breakdown story has the ring of truth about it lasting two years when he wasn't able to function.
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I think the entertainment industry is hard on the truly creative. It's a uses people up. The fact that he made it back is amazing.
 
For just us average folk...a nervous breakdown is we can't see it getting any better. We laugh or cry but we are stuck. With a prayer you are eligible for a medication that will turn the whole show off...night, night.
 
Phoenix said:
I think the entertainment industry is hard on the truly creative. It's a uses people up. The fact that he made it back is amazing.
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My two cousins did that and they lost who and what they are. They are more stuck than then ever were, and they are still depressed, and too drug dependent to do anything else. Years later they are in horrible shape. That kind of medication is a killer of the spirit.
 

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