Do you see yourself as an Introvert or an Extrovert?

I'm not sure but maybe I am an extrovert. I have joined a morning walking group with several ladies. There are no men there. I joined a morning coffee time with several ladies. There are no men there. I enjoy my quiet time to read but I also enjoy "shooting the breeze" with others that also enjoy "shooting the breeze."

It sure makes me wonder where the men are hiding and why they don't seem to join anything. Perhaps that explains why women outlive men by about 5 years? So for the gals šŸ‘. Unfortunately for those men in hiding šŸ‘Ž.
 

NorthernLight said:
Yes, introverts tend to be more active on the Internet.
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I think that's true.

I'd walk a mile to avoid a party and don't do well in crowds. However, at work when approached by a customer, I do quite well. I've always thought it's because I don't know the customer, and one-on-one with someone I don't know is far easier to manage than being in a group. I can't, just can't, speak in front of a group, tend to shrink back from even a small group at a gathering...
 
jimintoronto said:
A question for the group ? Do you think it is possible to turn a introvert teen ager into a outgoing and friendly adult ? Next door neighbour has a 15 year old girl who is afraid of everything in the world outside of their front door. She is in grade 10 and her Mother is going nuts trying to get the child to overcome her fears. Anyone here have any suggestions to help this child ? The mother is working full time ( her husband was killed in a car accident last year ) so she is out of the house 8 to 6 pm M-F. The girl does go to school, that isn't a problem. The problem is she never goes out on the weekends, and she isn't friends with any other girls . Ideas ? JimB.
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Why would anyone want to change a personā€™s innate personality? Being an introvert is partly genetic and partly due to the environment he/she lives in. This girl does not need to be pushed into being something she is not. To do so will only result in her going deeper into a shell.
Respect her personal space, she lost her father, her mother works long hours during the week. Perhaps she feels the need to be around her mother at the weekends. I get the impression the mother is going ā€œnutsā€ because she wants her out of the picture at the weekends. I am a plain speaker, but I have to say this, if this girl is pushed she could end up on a psychiatristā€™s couch. Leave her be and why ( with respect) are you getting involved?
 
I am an intorvert with most humans but I am an extrovert with most animals. Animals get me, most humans don't get me. That is okay, once the humans get to know one another we are fine. It just takes less time with animals. They can know you in an instant and know they are safe, loved, people take a little more time.
 
jimintoronto said:
Extrovert, for sure. Imagine going into a serious medical situation ( I was an Ambulance Attendant for 10 years here in Toronto ) and not being able to take charge of the scene ? Or speak to large numbers of people ( 500 or more ) about the benefits of learning CPR ? Or direct traffic as a Auxiliary Police Constable, as 40,000 fans are leaving a Blue Jays game at Rogers Center ? Being able to immediately speak to someone you have never met before, and ask them important questions about their medical history ? I can do all of that. Jim B
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Sorry, but what you are describing does not necessarily require the personality of an Extrovert. I was in sales for over 30 years. I gave presentations to over 3000 people, provided guided tours to clients and was VP of Sales for a large sales force. Because I'm an Introvert doesn't mean that I don't know how to lead or talk to people. It simply means I draw my energy from within, rather than from other people.

After I retired, I volunteered at our local arboretum during the holidays to be a docent in a home on the grounds that was decorated for Christmas. I can easily engage with other people. I just need my "down time". Look up the definition of an Introvert. I can do "all of that" as well. ;)
 
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Jamala said:
Why would anyone want to change a personā€™s innate personality? Being an introvert is partly genetic and partly due to the environment he/she lives in. This girl does not need to be pushed into being something she is not. To do so will only result in her going deeper into a shell.
Respect her personal space, she lost her father, her mother works long hours during the week. Perhaps she feels the need to be around her mother at the weekends. I get the impression the mother is going ā€œnutsā€ because she wants her out of the picture at the weekends. I am a plain speaker, but I have to say this, if this girl is pushed she could end up on a psychiatristā€™s couch. Leave her be and why ( with respect) are you getting involved?
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QFT. Worse than a shrinkā€™s couch, she could end up in the morgue.
 
I am concerned. Fifteen is a child. Children process grief differently than many adults. Her fear is perfectly understandable. Her dad died! Her world will never be as safe again. She needs stability, calm

energy, and, likely, close contact with her mother. I am amazed she can hold it together to go to school. Is she

getting any counselling? Grief therapy might help, preferably among peers. Adolescence is fraught enough without adults attempting to force feed their dealing with grief agenda on a mourning

child. I get that her mother may possibly feel stifled, but, in this instance, the childā€™s needs are paramount. I cannot stress enough how dangerous it could be to push this child!
 
jimintoronto said:
A question for the group ? Do you think it is possible to turn a introvert teen ager into a outgoing and friendly adult ? Next door neighbour has a 15 year old girl who is afraid of everything in the world outside of their front door. She is in grade 10 and her Mother is going nuts trying to get the child to overcome her fears. Anyone here have any suggestions to help this child ? The mother is working full time ( her husband was killed in a car accident last year ) so she is out of the house 8 to 6 pm M-F. The girl does go to school, that isn't a problem. The problem is she never goes out on the weekends, and she isn't friends with any other girls . Ideas ? JimB.
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I wouldn't get too worried about it. She's probably going through her growing pains. I was a little like that at some point. She will move on when the time comes. (edited: I don't have all the information, but based on my own life, I gave my thoughts so take it with a grain of salt, as they say.)
 
Lara said:
Many people now are doing their jobs online from home. Maybe Mom can do that and then go on short outings with her daughter when she has a break. Build trust. Go where happy people are. A little fresh air walk around the park would be great! People are usually happy when visiting a park, museums, zoos, arboretums, outdoor gardens, art galleries, etc.

So she'll begin to see there's nothing to be afraid of in the right places...and she'll begin to trust. Eventually sign her up for swim team at the YMCA or exercise classes there. Go with her until she feels comfortable to go alone.

I'm a friendly type extrovert (not overly friendly lol) on the island here and it's easy because most everyone is on vacation and thus happy. Those who live here are here because they love it here. I'm more cautious and introvert-ish on the mainland especially cities where I've been robbed, treated rudely, etc.

Adopt a sweet loving calm dog! I trust most Dog Lovers. The islanders often want to pet my dogs and share their experiences with their dogs (some have left their dogs with sitters due to "no pets allowed" rules that some owners have). I trust everyone here. I've never been given reason not to. Trust heals being introvert.
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The Mother is a dental assistant, kind of hard to do that "from home " . It may surprise you to learn that many people actually still go out to work. JimB.
 
Packerjohn said:
I'm not sure but maybe I am an extrovert. I have joined a morning walking group with several ladies. There are no men there. I joined a morning coffee time with several ladies. There are no men there. I enjoy my quiet time to read but I also enjoy "shooting the breeze" with others that also enjoy "shooting the breeze."

It sure makes me wonder where the men are hiding and why they don't seem to join anything. Perhaps that explains why women outlive men by about 5 years? So for the gals šŸ‘. Unfortunately for those men in hiding šŸ‘Ž.
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Check out any nursing home. The number of women is ten times that of men. JimB.
 
jimintoronto said:
...It may surprise you to learn that many people actually still go out to work.
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That's why I said "Many work from home". Not "All work from home. Why would it surprise me that "people actually go out to work"?
My head isn't in the sand. And I said "Maybe Mom could do that..." Your post sounds hostile. I took a lot of my time to do my best to make helpful suggestions because I care about the mother and her little girl. I'm sorry you didn't find it at all helpful.

Lara said:
Many people now are doing their jobs online from home. Maybe Mom can do that and then go on short outings with her daughter when she has a break. Build trust. Go where happy people are. A little fresh air walk around the park would be great! People are usually happy when visiting a park, museums, zoos, arboretums, outdoor gardens, art galleries, etc. Then her child can begin to see there's nothing to be afraid of in the right places...and she'll begin to trust. She can eventually sign her up for swim team at the YMCA or exercise classes there and go with her until she feels comfortable to go alone.
Mom can adopt a sweet loving calm dog! I trust most Dog Lovers. People often want to pet my dogs and share their experiences with their dogs. I trust everyone here. I've never been given reason not to. Trust heals being introvert.
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I am more introverted. I've taken the MBTI test...the real one. This is the only one determined to be reliable so be wary of internet online tests. There is so much on the internet that wanders astray from the original MBTI. The MBTI was developed as a career guidance tool and nothing more.

As far as introversion vs extroversion goes, according to the MBTI, it's where you draw your energy from.

Introverts draw energy from alone time and expend energy socializing. What helps both introverts and extroverts expend less energy socializing, is the amount of accepted presets they use when socializing.

The more heavily they have to think on their feet and come up with something new to have to think through in real time, the more taxing socializing becomes.

So an introvert can wear out an extrovert in conversation if it's getting too heavy for the extrovert.

An extrovert wears out an introvert by moving along in a rapid pace. The introvert moves very slowly and deliberately from one thing to another in conversation.

Introverts like to sift through their thoughts and need time to organize what they want to say and that's why communicating through texting is more appealing and comfortable.

Because extroverts react in real time, they do much better when socializing in groups.

How do you know which you are?

Look at your childhood. Did you quietly entertain yourself or did you more naturally gravitate to socializing in groups?

Over a lifetime, introverts learn to socialize better if they are mentally stable. They learn what extroverts already know how to do.
 
Iā€™m definitely introverted. Iā€™m that guy who would much rather be watching a movie at home alone than going to a party. My mother, an extrovert and social lion, tried desperately to ā€œchangeā€ me as a child, getting mad at me when I didnā€™t engage with strange adults and making my life miserable in the process. She failed to understand that introverts donā€™t need to be changed, converted, reformed, or ā€œhealed.ā€œ We are fine and happy as we are, just refrain from judging us, and leave us alone if you donā€™t like the way we rollā€¦ šŸ˜¾
 
LadyEmeraude said:
look deep inside yourself and decide, take a few minutes and think it over
of course, before you reply :):)
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I used to be extroverted but not having slept well since Nov. 8. 2016, I knew I could no longer afford to be extroverted, so other than two people, I shrank inward and it never has changed.
 
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