Does it bother you when people don't like you?

chic said:
Sure. Like most people, I would like to be appreciated by everyone. It also depends upon the person.

I have a neighbor who doesn't like me and lets me know it. Every time. If I run into him and try to say hello or make polite chit chat he doesn't even look me in the eye but mumbles something kind of surly. Next time I run into him I'm going to give him a dose of his own medicine. It's sort of a mean thing to do and I shouldn't but I must.

The devil is making me do it.
:p
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hmmmmmmmmmm.......not a good move chic. Before the invasion of the Coronacooties people were getting shot on a daily basis pretty much for existing but now forget about Chicago where just the innocent people are getting shot every 38 minutes on a weekday now people everywhere on this planet are getting shot, stabbed, burned alive, pushed off roofs, in front of trains, kicked, punched, slapped and gutted for not wearing masks or standing closer then 6 feet. Remember, none of us were born to be popular.
 
Having someone not like you at work can cause problems, especially if they're popular and very sociable, narcissistic backstabbers who try to make you look bad. In my 20 or so years working as a software engineer, I've had the misfortune of working with two such people — one male and one female. The female was a sociopath who could lie right in front of you with no sign of conscience, whatsoever. The male was just a dumbass who compensated for his lack of abilities by scapegoating others.

Now that I'm retired, I have no idea if anybody doesn't like me because I don't care. It really doesn't matter to me.
 
chic said:
I have a neighbor who doesn't like me and lets me know it. Every time. If I run into him and try to say hello or make polite chit chat he doesn't even look me in the eye but mumbles something kind of surly. Next time I run into him I'm going to give him a dose of his own medicine. It's sort of a mean thing to do and I shouldn't but I must.
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I haven't had that experience, but if I did, I would respect his reaction and wouldn't even try to say hello or chat with him. Not everybody wants to be friendly with everyone, I don't see why you're overreacting to this and don't just let it go. I don't seek to be appreciated by everyone, and I don't appreciate everyone. None of us were born on this earth to please everyone, and that's the way it should be, in my opinion. One reason I believe in divorce when couples don't get along, life is too short to be around someone who doesn't love you.....just move on.
 
Tish said:
No, not really, but then again I am a curious creature so would want to know why.
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An idiot maybe not enough of an explanation(?).

I've a tale to tell about a woman who moved with her very intelligent, possibly autistic son to a new very cliquey neighbourhood and found herself ostracised very quickly she said, by these people.

She had to cope with her boy apparently screaming at her all night until the age of seven, her job as a waitress, and then this awful treatment because her face didn't fit or something, (luckily a very good friend of mine, who I called my second mother, lived a mile or so away, and took the woman under her wing).

I'd have liked someone you to set about questioning these neighbours, but then again if my second mother couldn't do it, who was a strong person too, maybe there was nothing to be achieved in trying. :(
 
SeaBreeze said:
I haven't had that experience, but if I did, I would respect his reaction and wouldn't even try to say hello or chat with him.(break). I don't seek to be appreciated by everyone, and I don't appreciate everyone. None of us were born on this earth to please everyone, and that's the way it should be, in my opinion. One reason I believe in divorce when couples don't get along, life is too short to be around someone who doesn't love you.....just move on.
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If everyone thought life is so short no one should stay together in the hope one day love would return to their marriage, many romantic films and novels would lose their narrative and/or theme, (what would this do to those industries, have you thought about that aspect?).
(The purgatory some marriages turn into is another matter I agree!)
 
win231 said:
^^^^ BINGO!
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You probably know that modern humans belong to the species Homo sapiens. ... Humans can move on their own and are placed in the animal kingdom. Further, humans belong to the animal phylum known as chordates because we have a backbone. The human animal has hair and milk glands, so we are placed in the class of mammals.
 
I think it’s human nature to want everyone to like you as their not doing so can adversely impact on your sense of self-worth. As you walk down life’s highway, however, you will invariably encounter people who will dislike you just for being you; people are tuned to different frequencies. If you try to make everyone happy, you’ll likely make yourself miserable in the process, and stand for nothing. When starting work and both idealistic and naive , I once remarked to a superior that I wished I could make everyone happy at the same time. He replied that when I learned how to do that, I should come back and teach him...
 
Someone can dislike me, and have nothing at all wrong with their personality or attitude. If I sensed something like this was happening, I wouldn't demand to know his reasons, or try to punish him for his feelings. Sometimes we also have to take a look at ourselves honestly, and make sure his feelings aren't valid.....or, just let it go and not give it so much importance.
 
From your description of this neighbor, it sounds like he could be somewhere on the autistic spectrum, or have Asperger's. There are all sorts of behavior abnormalities where people just don't respond in the expected friendly manner. Not looking people in the eye is one symptom of this.
 
Fyrefox said:
I think it’s human nature to want everyone to like you as their not doing so can adversely impact on your sense of self-worth. As you walk down life’s highway, however, you will invariably encounter people who will dislike you just for being you; people are tuned to different frequencies. If you try to make everyone happy, you’ll likely make yourself miserable in the process, and stand for nothing. When starting work and both idealistic and naive , I once remarked to a superior that I wished I could make everyone happy at the same time. He replied that when I learned how to do that, I should come back and teach him...
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In my very early years at secondary school, so when I was maybe twelve years old, a boy called Bradley told me he hated me, and this came as a bit of a shock to me, as I'd no idea why he said it and hadn't thought I'd upset him in any way, (like you I was naively going through life thinking I could please everyone too!).

I cant remember how long it was before I got around to asking him why he said he hated me, and here is the very odd thing, he said he couldn't remember why he'd said it, and I truly believe he couldn't. He was a very bright student and went on to do very well at school and afterwards in his career I believe, therefore he was studious, well liked (ironically), and though he studied different subject than I chose so our paths didn't cross so often but we never had any problems at all.

I've remembered it so that says something, and a guy or girl telling you they hate you is a pretty strong message obviously, and maybe someone letting me know or think you cant please everyone, or know why you've upset someone at times, he gave me a necessary lesson in life, (though many times since I've had to re-learn it I have to admit). :unsure:
 


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