I choose a long time ago after I was so disappointed with someone to re-think and take these 2 words out of my life rather than people.
I thought about if I held expectations of people and how I felt when they had them with me.
I realized that an employer should have them of me, they pay me to do a job and how to do it.
Friends and family, not so much, it was better to Hope rather than expect. Be grateful when your hope came to light. Understand
when it didn't that your life and theirs was not the same. What's good for me, may not be for them.
When I refused to allow myself to "Expect" someone to act or react a certain way. I lost a lot of stress, worry and anger. I don't like someone trying to make me be what they want me to be, a mini-me of themselves. And I contribute "Expectations" to be the culprit.
Promises, that one is tricky. Most times, not all, but surely most, promises are made well in advance of paying it back and made during an emotional
event. No one knows when they may have to keep most promises. You have to wait for the future. So many things can change in a short period of time.
Even though you may want to dearly but you have to decline, neither person feels good about it. Sometimes it even rips the relationship apart.
I made and kept 3 promises in my life. I have been asked more than that to make them. I always answer that with "When the time comes and you need this from me and I am capable and able I will be more than glad to help with it, but I can't promise it"
Of those 3 promises I did keep, one absolutely nearly cost me my relationship with my sister and all my savings. I had promised my Mother to keep up her house and allow my sister to live there rent free and use Mom's insurance policy funds to pay the taxes and house insurance as long as my sister chose to live there. My sister chose to moveout of state and did not tell me, rented it out to a friend and collected the rent. I ended up having to sell it for land value only when I finally got the renters out. The other 2 promises turned out better.
When we promise, we have the best of intentions but sometimes things just come up. No one wins when they can't be returned.
How do you feel about those 2 words? I know when I chose to not allow then in my life, the world became a better place for me.
I thought about if I held expectations of people and how I felt when they had them with me.
I realized that an employer should have them of me, they pay me to do a job and how to do it.
Friends and family, not so much, it was better to Hope rather than expect. Be grateful when your hope came to light. Understand
when it didn't that your life and theirs was not the same. What's good for me, may not be for them.
When I refused to allow myself to "Expect" someone to act or react a certain way. I lost a lot of stress, worry and anger. I don't like someone trying to make me be what they want me to be, a mini-me of themselves. And I contribute "Expectations" to be the culprit.
Promises, that one is tricky. Most times, not all, but surely most, promises are made well in advance of paying it back and made during an emotional
event. No one knows when they may have to keep most promises. You have to wait for the future. So many things can change in a short period of time.
Even though you may want to dearly but you have to decline, neither person feels good about it. Sometimes it even rips the relationship apart.
I made and kept 3 promises in my life. I have been asked more than that to make them. I always answer that with "When the time comes and you need this from me and I am capable and able I will be more than glad to help with it, but I can't promise it"
Of those 3 promises I did keep, one absolutely nearly cost me my relationship with my sister and all my savings. I had promised my Mother to keep up her house and allow my sister to live there rent free and use Mom's insurance policy funds to pay the taxes and house insurance as long as my sister chose to live there. My sister chose to moveout of state and did not tell me, rented it out to a friend and collected the rent. I ended up having to sell it for land value only when I finally got the renters out. The other 2 promises turned out better.
When we promise, we have the best of intentions but sometimes things just come up. No one wins when they can't be returned.
How do you feel about those 2 words? I know when I chose to not allow then in my life, the world became a better place for me.
