George Washington Was A Woman

[SifuPhil]

Or those little paper panties for turkey legs ...

 

[SifuPhil]

Sometimes Martha was known to grab a curtain panel and wrap it around her head, for those "This? I just threw any old thing on" days ...

 

[Shalimar]

Guys. There really are toilet paper covers, put out by the Bathroom Police. Lest people dwell on the unseemingly act of defecation, self or otherwise, there are cute little crocheted doilies, some in the shape of dollies dontcha know, to cover it up. Shhhhh!

 

[SifuPhil]

 

[Shalimar]

Phil, you are not taking this seriously! Notice the noose-like wrap around Martha's neck. Clearly she was despondent. Wouldn't you be over all those rude turkeys?

 

[SifuPhil]

In case anyone is wondering how we got from George Washington's true gender to a freakish TP cover, well, I though SF was missing a good existentialist thread. :turnaround:

 

[Shalimar]

Ah the electrocuted-owl-fez toilet paper cover. Fetching!

 

[QuickSilver]

Sometimes Martha was known to grab a curtain panel and wrap it around her head, for those "This? I just threw any old thing on" days ...

View attachment 20721

This came to mind..

 

[Shalimar]

Phil, I am embracing my inner stoic as we speak.

 

[Shalimar]

Carol Burnett! I saw that episode, too funny!

 

[SifuPhil]

Phil, you are not taking this seriously! Notice the noose-like wrap around Martha's neck. Clearly she was despondent. Wouldn't you be over all those rude turkeys?

That's true - I feel bad for making light of what was clearly a case of suicidal ideation.

Understandable, really, since in her younger days she looked like this -

 

[SifuPhil]

Phil, I am embracing my inner stoic as we speak.

I tried that once ...

His wife slapped me silly.

 

[Shalimar]

Phil, hahahahha.

 

[Shalimar]

When Martha was young, she wore snakes on her head? That explains a great deal

 

[SifuPhil]

When Martha was young, she wore snakes on her head? That explains a great deal

Her earlier fashion attempts were, shall we say, less than inspiring ...

 

[Shalimar]

Is this what ultimately inspired Gorgonzola? Help, I am developing a paralysing fear of cheese.....

 

[Meanderer]

Her earlier fashion attempts were, shall we say, less than inspiring ...

View attachment 20725

This is a different Martha...."It's a good thing"...Stewart!

 

[SifuPhil]

 

[SifuPhil]

This is a different Martha...."It's a good thing"...Stewart!

Coming soon to a K-Mart near you!

 

[Shalimar]

Thanks Meanderer, I thought the face was familiar.

 

[Shalimar]

Phil, so cruel to cheese me when I'm down.

 

[QuickSilver]

Poor Martha..... Stewart..... Can't seem to stay out of trouble.

 

[Meanderer]

George Washington Was A Transgendered Female.

"George Washington was born "Kimberly Louise Washington" on the 11th February 1731, the daughter of Augustine Washington (1694–1743) and his second wife, Mary Ball Washington, a wealthy, well connected Colonial Virginia family who owned cannabis plantations in the deep south. Kimberly felt different from other children from an early age, and began to develop what was then termed as "unnatural feelings" for girls her own age at school. Convinced that she had been born into the wrong body, she quickly underwent gender reassignment surgery at the age of 15, and consequently changed her name to "George". She did this with the blessing of her mother, her father had a nervous breakdown".

 

[Shalimar]

Meanderer, HaHaHaHa. I just spit coffee aaaalll over my Chinese housecoat! Lol. Funniest post on the thread. Whoopy award goes to you!

 

[Shalimar]

Cannabis plantations?? Say it isn't so! (fainting.)