Getting Old and Unhappy

Nothing wrong with you at all.. we all suffer knowing we're getting older and facing the grim reaper.... try not to dwell on it.. just make some new friends here.. and that will bring you out of the doldrums


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I read all these things saying I should be grateful for all I have, and I try, but I am not very successful at it. I have more than most do, but I feel lonely and sad much of the time. I want more friends and activities. My husband is satisfied sitting at home, but I want more. Ideas?
 
Welcome to SF.

You are not happy because you are adjusting to new normals, that happen much faster than ever..well, than since you were 1-18 years old that is.
Aging is just a word at this stage of life for adjusting to rapidly developing new normals.
Physical aging begins at 30-38 on average.
The new normal at your 72 is looking at that new "normal" person in your mirror and accepting the fact she needs to put on her big girl panties, some nice lipstick, comb her hair and ENJOY what you can while you can.
It can be done, all of us here are doing it and all those before us have done it.

You got this far: you are NO sissy or wimp!
And if you are spiritual: God is in control. Always has your back.
 
OH! A husband who doesn't want to do? Tell him it is perfectly fine if he wants to just sit at home.

Unless you are joined at the hip: go make your own fun!
I have been in your shoes for four years...and am ready to set up a Girls SF trip to Tahiti or Japan; Croatia, you name it.
Seriously. No husbands allowed.
 
Finding activities that I like to do has been a life-changer for me. For example, attending activities at church or the senior center. Also, getting involved in the community. Doing a hobby, like painting or music or knitting also fill my days, as well as reading/writing/teaching. Sharing some of my projects as gifts to others is also rewarding. Watching good movies helps pass the time. Keeping busy has helped me stay happy after I lost my husband. Also, as others said, spending time on SF is a good choice. The folks here helped me cope with my widowhood, which was priceless, and I am grateful for it. Counting my blessings is top of my list.
 
I went back to school at 52, as I retired at 46 from military service.
I was bored to tears, I loved being "out there with others on my peers...".
Been ready to go to work again, the last two years...but no one wants to hire older women, regardles of thier experience - and am not looking for high stress positions, or M-F.

Considering a trip to AUS or go to graduate school again...
 
DebraHartman said:
I am 72 years old, in good health, but having difficulty dealing with getting old. I have everything I need in life but I am not happy. What is wrong with me?
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I find that having a goal-oriented physical activity helps to keep my 78 year old mind active and gives me a sense of accomplishment.

In my case the goal is to dig up blackberry bushes and replant the area in grass. Its not a lofty goal but it keeps me busy. And I can proudly say I have reclaimed abut an acre during the last two years.

So I guess what I am suggesting is to use the talents you have to engage your body and mind.

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It's been 15years since my husband passed away. A friend said to me one day, "How do you feel now being a Widow"? That statement hit me right between the eyes as I never considered that word" Widow". I became a little depressed but had a good talk to myself and told me to shake off the blues and never feel sorry for myself. From that day forward I have kept myself busy and started to get myself in the best physical health as I had to have a Triple By-pass 2 years after he died.
I was determined to keep going and did a lot of walking when I was allowed to. Now after all this time I try to better myself when I got myself a Pedometer Step Counter and try to do more steps each day. Keeping busy is the key to your success!!
 
DebraHartman said:
I read all these things saying I should be grateful for all I have, and I try, but I am not very successful at it. I have more than most do, but I feel lonely and sad much of the time. I want more friends and activities. My husband is satisfied sitting at home, but I want more. Ideas?
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Sounds like you are depressed. You might need to talk to your doctor or a psychologist.
If you really are depressed, then all the advice you may receive here is unlikely to bring you up from your low state. Couples therapy might help but I'm no expert so get the best advice you can from qualified professionals.

What I do know is that sitting at home with your husband all day is not going to do you any good. He may be OK in his own skin, but he isn't going to lift you up if he stays house bound. You have to look past him to find what fulfils your needs and go for it.
 
DebraHartman said:
My husband is satisfied sitting at home, but I want more. Ideas?
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I think that is why some Seniors find comfort in Volunteering. When I retired I was bored to tears in a month. I looked back at all the years I wanted to sit around and do nothing and thought I was nuts. So I started helping out at a homeless shelter. Let me tell you, that was a real education. It changed my outlook on a lot of things. I also loved my bicycle. Riding is good for you, and it's a lot of fun. Maybe you could go for rides together?
 
DebraHartman said:
I read all these things saying I should be grateful for all I have, and I try, but I am not very successful at it. I have more than most do, but I feel lonely and sad much of the time. I want more friends and activities. My husband is satisfied sitting at home, but I want more. Ideas?
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What do you want?
 

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