I should've added "most" men and women. And I do know of one guy who is very interested in being around family, even stepkids/stepgrands. So I should've made it clearer, not all men or women, but it sure has been most in my experience.
Bella, I agree with you now. But, for the past ten years, I flirted but immediately made it clear I didn't want to date. Well, it worked. Now I've changed my tune.The hitting on thing. Yes, I wish an attractive guy my age would hit on me. He'd have a good chance of me hitting him back!
Bella
It is the general consensus that the right guy just isn't to be found. But then, what's the right guy?? I'd like to start with chats, then getting to know them by laughing at their daily antics, sharing tidbits and making fun of my own goofs, and seeing if that makes a stronger connection. Yep, that sounds like the right attitude for me. Online or off, in the park or on the threads....
There's nothing wrong with being flirty @Right Now. It usually signals you're interested in someone, but I think flirting and then backing off is confusing for the person you're flirting with. That's not meant as criticism, merely an observation. Whether it's online or in person, I hope, since you've changed your mind about dating, you get the opportunity to flirt with someone you'd actually like to date.
I'm not flirty. I'm fun, friendly, and straight-forward, but I don't flirt. If I did, it would only be directed at a man I was clearly interested in dating because I don't want to attract unwanted advances. In my youth, I often wondered why guys would hit on me when I gave no indication of interest in them other than the fact that I was as friendly to them as I was to others in general. I thought some guys mistook friendliness for interest and read more into it than what was really there because of their own desires.
These days I don't have to worry about any of it, lol! Opportunities to meet people are all but non-existent. I still have a modicum of hope only because I'm not dead yet. Most guys are interested in being with younger women no matter their age, and I no longer fit that bill unless the guy is ancient. There's a razor-slim chance I might meet a man my own age who actually likes women who are my age. Who knows? Stranger things have happened, but I won't be holding my breath. I exhaled a long time ago.
Bella
You, my friend, I believe, are the exception. Thanks for saying that. It gives me hope that there might be another rare bird like you flying around out there in the universe.
Very few around here also. Unfortunately, to increase the chances of meeting people, you have to go where the most people are which means moving to a more populated area, in other words, larger cities, which in a lot of cases people just can't afford to do or for some reason hate city living. (Not me, I'd love to have a great apartment or condo in or near a nice big city but that seems to be just me.)
I was not flattered at all. I saw what was going on. These fellows knew we had worked out butts off, they just wanted to ride someone else's skirt tales. What they failed to realize, I did not wear skirts. LOL I was a blue jean wearing, cut the grass, grow vegetables hard working lady. That was in addition to working a full time job and running a house.
Wow, Blessed, the sort-of senior center we have offers nothing like that (only help with probs such as places to live, drives to drs. apptmts. etc., no activities whatsoever). And the local library cut out activities as soon as Covid hit and has only started a few things back up. And what little the local churches and community colleges offered has also been cut way back & shows no signs of coming back (I've checked). IDK, maybe because this is a university town; I know that if you ask any of the brick-and-mortar stores that are still open why they don't carry a particular item, the answer is "the college kids don't buy that."
Yes.
I hear you. Me too. Going to get back into my drawing.
Ruthanne, Show us your drawings. Will you?
I have some abstracts and other stuff. I'll take pictures and post them asap.
I can't, John. As far as I'm concerned, there's no comparison. Nothing can take the place of the company of a loving spouse or partner. Maybe some people can fill the void with TV, a few friends, children, grandchildren, pets, outings, and other activities, and that's enough for them. Depending on what kind of relationship they had with their spouse, they might prefer not to fill that void with another partner or romantic companion. It could be because they think no one else could possibly "measure up". Or maybe they just don't want that kind of intimate relationship again. Others have no choice but to turn to TV, etc., to fill the void, whether they prefer it that way or not.
It's a real dilemma for many now single people. You've got plenty of time to decide how and what you want to do. Be gentle with yourself as you deserve much good care after all you've been through.
Good to know I am not the only one.
I am still in the hunt. I keep going to pickleball and discussion groups. I think I will eventually meet someone who feels 'just right', but the rule seems to be that you have to suffer through many frustrating encounters to get there, lol.
