Aunt Mavis
I have met the enemy and he is us. Pogo
I do like to entertain but, Aunt Mavis is real. I’ll never forget her trying to kiss me right on the lips at Thanksgiving! Thank God I turned my head in time for it to land on my cheek. That breath!!! Yikes!!!She's a figment of your imagination this aunt of yours in my humble opinion, and until some kind of proof is forthcoming I'll stick to that view.
Still, if she does exist its hard to fault her direct, no nonsense way of speaking, and I'd guess an anthology of her best put downs could be worth publishing, (bet your uncle kept his head down when she was in a mood too!).