How are you living with consequences of not planning for future?

KingsX said:
Unless bad choices make you bankrupt.

I have a friend who always earned more money than me. But while I saved, she spent.
Currently she gets more SS income than I do. But she is not able to hold onto money.
She doesn't have a lot of material things. But somehow she manages to squander a lot
of money. When she sold her paid off house she blew through all that money in a only
a few years... and now has nothing to show for it.
Click to expand...


My friend is in the bankruptcy process now.

She keeps wondering when will she get new credit cards.

I have tried to advise her that when she does get credit cards again
how to handle them [ie, pay them off every month.] But I can tell she is
not listening. Just recently she let it slip that she still goes to Starbucks
for their expensive coffee.

.
 

Colleen said:
.....How do you get this message through to the younger generation that they will be in a world of hurt if they haven't prepared.
Click to expand...

Actually, Millennial parents are doing much, much better than anyone else at saving:

Forbes, October 2017:
Millennials May End Up Saving More For Retirement Than Their Parents' Generation

NerdWallet study reports that “millennial parents may be out-saving parents of every other generation in terms of retirement.”

Here’s the breakdown:


  • Millennial parents put 10% of their annual income into their retirement accounts. Millennial parents are defined as parents 18 to 34.
  • Gen X parents put 8% of their annual income into their retirement accounts. Gen X parents are defined as parents 34 to 55.
  • Baby boomer parents put 5% of their annual income into their retirement accounts. Baby boomer parents are defined as parents 55 or older.

All of this information reflects the median retirement contribution for each generation. While it is possible that boomer retirement contributions could be slowing down as they near retirement, NerdWallet says that all respondents of the survey are employed, so “retired baby boomers did not skew that generation’s contribution rate.”
 
Lethe200 said:
Actually, Millennial parents are doing much, much better than anyone else at saving:

Forbes, October 2017:
Millennials May End Up Saving More For Retirement Than Their Parents' Generation

NerdWallet study reports that “millennial parents may be out-saving parents of every other generation in terms of retirement.”

Here’s the breakdown:


  • Millennial parents put 10% of their annual income into their retirement accounts. Millennial parents are defined as parents 18 to 34.
  • Gen X parents put 8% of their annual income into their retirement accounts. Gen X parents are defined as parents 34 to 55.
  • Baby boomer parents put 5% of their annual income into their retirement accounts. Baby boomer parents are defined as parents 55 or older.

All of this information reflects the median retirement contribution for each generation. While it is possible that boomer retirement contributions could be slowing down as they near retirement, NerdWallet says that all respondents of the survey are employed, so “retired baby boomers did not skew that generation’s contribution rate.”
Click to expand...

That's been my personal observation, too. Their parents and grandparents have instilled in them the importance of saving for retirement, which quite frankly was barely discussed with Boomers when we were in our twenties and thirties never mind our teens.

My husband and I showed our kids power bills, mortgage payments, etc., when they were still in middle school to give them a sense of what it cost to support a household. It was not to scare them but rather to educate them. Many times they have expressed appreciation for sharing that information, especially because many of their contemporaries were clueless about that aspect of life.

p.s. Not to over generalize, but I think the Millennials are a spectacular group of young people who get unfairly dissed by Boomers.
 

StarSong said:
That's been my personal observation, too. Their parents and grandparents have instilled in them the importance of saving for retirement, which quite frankly was barely discussed with Boomers when we were in our twenties and thirties never mind our teens.

My husband and I showed our kids power bills, mortgage payments, etc., when they were still in middle school to give them a sense of what it cost to support a household. It was not to scare them but rather to educate them. Many times they have expressed appreciation for sharing that information, especially because many of their contemporaries were clueless about that aspect of life.

p.s. Not to over generalize, but I think the Millennials are a spectacular group of young people who get unfairly dissed by Boomers.
Click to expand...
I think they are spectacular also.
 
StarSong said:
That's been my personal observation, too. Their parents and grandparents have instilled in them the importance of saving for retirement, which quite frankly was barely discussed with Boomers when we were in our twenties and thirties never mind our teens.
Click to expand...


Many boomers [like me] had depression era parents who taught them to be thrifty and save. My father was thrifty and saved. He was able to buy a house and small farm, raise three children, and retire at age 62. He did all that on one blue-collar salary as my mother was a homemaker.

In my Texas elementary school, my teacher taught us about saving money. She took my class on a field trip to the local bank on the town square to open savings accounts.

When I was in junior high school, civics class was required during which we were taught about the economy and personal finance.

.
 
Don M. said:
I think most retirees fall into one of two categories.....1, being those who recognized that they too would some day grow old and retire, and managed their finances accordingly....and 2, those who lived only for "today", and gave little thought to what the future might hold.

I am often amazed at some of the reports I read about how little some Seniors have managed to set aside for their retirements.
Click to expand...


there are articles daily about supposedly how little everyone has and most articles lack even a hint of credibility .

the reality is no one knows what anyone really has . in fact there is whole under ground off the books economy going on . everyone seems to have what they do workout in the end. they may not like the lifestyle but they make it work .

far to many spend to much time poking their nose in to what others have or don't have. they would be far better served learning to make their own plans better
 
mathjak107 said:
there are articles daily about supposedly how little everyone has and most articles lack even a hint of credibility .

the reality is no one knows what anyone really has . in fact there is whole under ground off the books economy going on . everyone seems to have what they do workout in the end. they may not like the lifestyle but they make it work .

far to many spend to much time poking their nose in to what others have or don't have. they would be far better served learning to make their own plans better
Click to expand...


I agree that many of the official reports of people's assets often seems unlikely. We all figure out how to manage as best we can.

The underground (cash) economy is much more robust in New York and its surrounding area than in many other parts of the country, Los Angeles included. I know, having lived in both places. For instance, "under the table jobs" for teens are virtually nonexistent in LA, but when I visit my NY & NJ relatives their kids all work for cash. (Meantime they have enormous US flags flying on their front porches and patriotic bumper stickers plastered on their cars - but that's another thread altogether.)
 
Last edited:
Mr X said:
Hello, folks!

Quick summary:

I'm 55, my wife will turn 60 this year. I have worked in IT industry for 30 years - the kind of jobs with good salaries, but a DIY approach to retirement savings. Result: I have no 401, no IRA, no pension - nothing. I'm still working, making more then I ever have, but it's only a matter of time before I'm replaced by a new grad. My wife works as an aid for the school district. The pay is terrible, but insurance is good and there is a retirement plan that will pay about $400/month if she were to quit in two years, a bit more as time goes on.

We have no savings. Debt consists of a couple credit cards and an IRS payment plan - about 5K total debt. Equity in our house is between 50k - 100k, depending on who you ask (neighbor just sold his place for top dollar, so I'm figuring 70 - 100 is more realistic.) There is still an eternity left on mortgage. Monthly housing nut (mortgage, insurance, taxes) is about $1150, which is less than a decent apartment around here.

My wife has diabetes (manageable) , so health care costs will be an issue. That is why her benefits more than compensate for low pay (plus she gets summers off). Health care won't be an issue for me, as I have decided to make my unhealthy lifestyle a part of my exit strategy. I don't go for preventative tests and will let nature take it's course. We don't have kids, so it's not as selfish as it may sound.

I've read all there is to say on how to "fix" our situation and, frankly, it's no help. If I was able to keep my current job, at my current salary for 10 more years and put 30% of my gross income into an employer-matched retirement fund, then, yes, there would be hope. Unfortunately (as stated in paragraph 1) that's not realistic.

So I guess I am asking for stories from the trenches. I'd like to hear from people in my position who are little farther down the road. Did you find a way to make enough money to keep your home and downsize your lifestyle? Did you buy a trailer on a big lot in some rural local and live cheap? Did you decide to live in a van? Where still able to move back into your parent's basement?

I don't mean for this sound flippant. My wife and I have obviously put ourselves in a terrible situation, but I'd really like to find some options other than "start eating cat food now and put rest of your $ in a company sponsored IRA."
Click to expand...

Hi, I had to retire early due to my anxiety, I had about 40 thousand in debt. My anxiety was so bad that I hadn't given my debit a second thought. I ended up having to file bankruptcy, which is a 10 years worth of consequences. I can't work even PT because of my anxiety. I'm living on SSI n my retirement savings which isn't much. I'm looking to rent a room, problem is they might want to check my credit? So I'm scared for my future. I have no one to turn too. My kids can't handle my anxiety. At least you have some income. I'm living on borrowed time. I can't change anything, it is what it is, I just pray every day. Wish you the best
 
Yes n No, I've placed an ad on a website to rent a room. Some of them want as much an apartment? I got applications for senior housing, of course there's a waiting list for All of them. I haven't given up. Thanks for asking.
 
Patnono by posting you want to rent a room that clearly indicates you don't have a lot of "stuff" to move anywhere with. Toss in " living on SSI n my retirement saving" both sources of income that can be transferred anywhere. A bonus for not being locked into where you are now would be.

"I have no one to turn too. My kids can't handle my anxiety."

Since you have obviously have access to a computer spending time looking for a place to live you can afford would benefit you more.

Just for fun I typed this in Google [rooms for rent in Kansas] found this apartment
Clay Terrace
9327 NE 79th Street, Kansas City, MO 64158
Exact Match
1 Bed from $585 - $595

Doing something positive to change your anxiety or at least the part about your inability to afford a place to live would be a step you could take.
 
Knight - I was thinking along the same lines, but my inclination was to suggest a mobile or RV park that has park models or used RVs for sale. AZ, NM and other areas in the southwest are loaded with these kinds of parks. Many charge inexpensive rent or purchase options. If your family is still in CA, Patnono, some of these places would be a mere car ride away.
 
Knight said:
Patnono by posting you want to rent a room that clearly indicates you don't have a lot of "stuff" to move anywhere with. Toss in " living on SSI n my retirement saving" both sources of income that can be transferred anywhere. A bonus for not being locked into where you are now would be.

"I have no one to turn too. My kids can't handle my anxiety."

Since you have obviously have access to a computer spending time looking for a place to live you can afford would benefit you more.

Just for fun I typed this in Google [rooms for rent in Kansas] found this apartment
Clay Terrace
9327 NE 79th Street, Kansas City, MO 64158
Exact Match
1 Bed from $585 - $595

Doing something positive to change your anxiety or at least the part about your inability to afford a place to live would be a step you could take.
Click to expand...


This was my thoughts also. Also, what StarSong said :) I've been in situations like Patnono in my younger years. My ex took off with everything including the car. I was 50 years old and had no way to work except walk 4 miles one way. I made $5/hr. and worked part-time. I had no family and my "church family" that was a big part of my life for 12 years while I was married to my ex, deserted me and turned their back on me. I was too old to get any kind of assistance because I didn't have kids and too young to collect SS. I lived in the east at the time so I had horrendous heating bills in the winter. It was a very dark time in my life and I didn't know where to turn. I went to the unemployment office all the time to look for a decent job, but I was too old (they didn't come right out and say that, but that's what it was). I even tried getting a job in a larger city about 40 miles away, but no dice. Talk about anxiety!! I weighed 98 pounds and I seldom ate a meal. I lived on toast.

A Higher Power was watching over me, however, and did bring someone from my past back into my life. Everything changed for me at that point.

What I'm saying is...your circumstances can change if you help yourself.

One thing I want to point out...maybe relocation is the answer. I've lived in CA and I know how expensive it is. Personally...I don't get the attraction of CA and I'd never live there again. That said....I've lived in a LOT of states and the most affordable I've ever lived in was TX. We live in AZ and I love the weather (we're in the NW, close to Las Vegas and at 3400 ft. elevation, so we get milder weather than Phoenix), but it's not as cheap to live here as TX. We moved to AZ 4 years ago because of less humidity than TX.

Either way....maybe start looking into making a new life for yourself somewhere that you can afford. Good luck.
 
Thanks for writing, I looked into Texas, El paso 1 bedroom apartment $445. The thing I need to consider is my age 63 and my health, I have diabetes and if something happens to me? I'll be alone and my kids probably wouldn't be able to drop what their doing to help me since it would be my decision. So that's something I need to consider?
I've lived in California all my life and I don't get it either the fascination with it? I'm guessing the weather? Cause it is very expensive �� there are jobs here, but won't pay enough to live here. I've had a rough past too, my ex-husband was verbally abusive to me and our kids and had a double life he had 2 other kids with 2 other women. Pretty sure this was going on the whole time we were married? I left pretty much with the clothes on our backs. We were homeless for about a month staying at my cousin's house who pretty much you can tell didn't want us there? So I was under pressure to find us a place to live. He's miserable with the woman he's with now. That was almost 20 years ago. That was the BEST decision I ever made.
 
Patnono said:
Thanks for writing, I looked into Texas, El paso 1 bedroom apartment $445. The thing I need to consider is my age 63 and my health, I have diabetes and if something happens to me? I'll be alone and my kids probably wouldn't be able to drop what their doing to help me since it would be my decision. So that's something I need to consider?

.
Click to expand...


Lots of military and military vets live in El Paso.

.
 
Patnono said:
I looked into Texas, El paso 1 bedroom apartment $445. The thing I need to consider is my age 63 and my health, I have diabetes and if something happens to me? I'll be alone and my kids probably wouldn't be able to drop what their doing to help me since it would be my decision. So that's something I need to consider?
Click to expand...

Patnono said:
My father was born there, but looks like moving out of state is not a option, looking to rent a room.
Click to expand...


If you want to be close to your children... can't you stay with your children ?

If you are going to rent a room, why not rent a room from one of them ??

.
 
They live with me, and my grandson who has enough energy to like up the city. I need to move because my daughter seems to think that because he's my grandson that I should babysit him? She sometimes takes advantage of that. Doesn't clean up after him and leaves piles of dishes in the sink.
This has caused tension between us, I'm retired and my health is not the best. I guess because I'm retired she feels more entitled for me to do what she wants? So me moving will be the best for my health and the relationship.
 
Patnono said:
They live with me, and my grandson who has enough energy to like up the city. I need to move because my daughter seems to think that because he's my grandson that I should babysit him? She sometimes takes advantage of that. Doesn't clean up after him and leaves piles of dishes in the sink.
This has caused tension between us, I'm retired and my health is not the best. I guess because I'm retired she feels more entitled for me to do what she wants? So me moving will be the best for my health and the relationship.
Click to expand...

I must have misunderstood your circumstances. My take was that you needed to move because of dire financial circumstances, not because of family problems. That's a whole other kettle of fish. Which isn't to say it's less serious, but it's definitely different.
 
Financial is also the other reason, she does not help with that, my savings is dwindling down. Since I pay for pretty much for everything.
I'm being made to feel like I live with THEM?
We haven't been talking much, there's no consideration for my age and health. I did 32 years in a factory, which has taken a toll on me physically.
 
Patnono, Even though there is tension between you and your daughter, and I assume you've both tried to talk it over, just be sure you don't jump from the frying pan into the fire.
If you move or she were to move out and you were then alone, would that then create a new anxiety?
Sometimes we are looking for a perfect or near perfect situation, but in the end the situation were are currently in turns out to be the next best thing after all. Just food for thought....I've dealt with immeasurable anxiety over changing circumstances over the last few years.....and yes, anxiety, just plain stinks.
 
Yes, we have tried talking, it went in one ear and out the other, Normal. I don't think it would be worse me leaving or her leaving because she doesn't help in any way financially, it's draining my retirement savings me paying for everything.
I've had offers for rooms to rent where I would SAVE so much money. She doesn't get it??? I'm giving her till beginning of next year. she does have a place to stay, with my oldest daughter.
 
Oh, I see, well in that case, yes, if it's a financial problem too, where you're going to be left with no money since she takes but does not contribute..... you're choice may be made for you already. If you can save money better to take action now than wait til the end and be broke.
Something though is still making you stay or not kick her out to save your own skin, financially?
 

You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top