To stop any arguments with my sister, I told my mother that she would have first dibs on my mother's personal property. My sister took it all! Okay, no worries, it really didn't bother me. But she took all the slides and photos from our babyhood onward, and from my mother's entire life in Germany. She was going to do something with them and send me copies. She didn't do that. She also decided she was the gatekeeper for all of my mother's personal papers, so if I want information from them, she won't give it to me.
The worst part is that she told me what my mother had told her about my not letting her see my kids for 3 years. My mother lied to her! I told her the truth and she told me I was lying!
Then she accused me of stealing a scarf from my mother's possessions. She was really mad about that. Only problem is that I didn't take it. A scarf? These scarves that are decorative -- people wear them around their necks; most were silk. I *hate* wearing scarves. They and ruffles make me feel ridiculous. There is no way I want a scarf. She accused me of lying again!
In the end, I just stopped talking to her. I don't see that changing. I do not like being accused of things I did not do. I do not like her gatekeeper stance. In my immediate family, heck, in my extended family on both sides, I have more education than anyone (attorney, accountant). I have the only children -- triplets and a daughter who was born 1.5 years after them. I am not a dumb woman, nor am I a woman who has lazed around all her life. I haven't actually lazed around at all until I got cancer, and then I had no choice.
You would think I was the black sheep of the family. I honestly think I am, and I don't know why. Maybe it's because when we were in high school, I went out with my friends. She had male eggheads over for evenings of chess. Maybe we are too different. But I will say this, just because I like to have fun and joke around, doesn't mean I am stupid. It means I have a personality and am myself.
She actually hired an attorney to draft my mother's will. The attorney took the will I drafted and copied it, word for word! Except for the executor. My sister talked my mother into making her the executor (on her death bed) because she was more qualified with her bachelor's degree in hotel management.
Oh man, I really am ranting now! Sorry, not sorry.