I am leaving forum

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I've been known to dance on a bar a time or two. That was back in my wild and crazy youth. After dancing on a bar I was too embarrassed to go back:)

Ameriscot, I didn't know who he was, either. Guess we must have frequented different threads, just like in real life. LOL
 
Belonging to a forum is akin to attending a neighborhood or family dinner party. Small talk or playing 'Charades' usually dominate the night's interaction. I always felt uncomfortable at such gatherings simply because I find it an unproductive use of my time. That's just me. So I began turning down invitations with lame excuses. I was never one to meet friends at the local coffee shop or bar to have a drink either. My wife and children accused me of being a snob. I was more interested in the latest blockbuster movie, tech gadget or new approach to solving the problems we faced. I'm not an avid fan of any sports team. I don't like to take risky chances or want my children and grand children taking unnecessary chances either, a real worry wort.

That being said I have started several threads about things I find interesting to others or pertinent to my lifestyle, I never discuss religion or politics simply because as a small cog in the big world, I realize that I have no control over the events as they unfold. You can admonish your politicians until you are blue in the face but nothing really changes. 2 books that were on best seller lists 20-30 years ago made me more aware of my place in the scheme of things. The books titles were 'Don't Sweat the Small Stuff', and 'All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten'. Both gave me my mantra for life from that point on. The way this forum is set up makes anything you post or start a permanent record after 24 hours. Facebook gives you the opportunity to remove something you post then realize that it's of interest only to you and after reflection it appears uninteresting to others. Here, after you post it may just sit there and no one responds, requiring you the poster to determine the validity or importance of the thread.

I've gone back and changed the title or deleted what I posted but you need something in the body of the thread. I've asked the admins to delete my posts for one reason or another because I don't like having egg on my face or am embarrassed as I stand in group with dead silence. It's interesting to me what generates responses and what doesn't. Games seem to be the highlight of some members, again something that I choose not to participate in. I was going to leave, 'Take my ball and go home' also but I find most of the threads informative or entertaining but never one for small talk I don't respond unless I think I have something that pertains to the thread. I've refrained several times out of fear I might insult someone with a biting comment just for personal enjoyment. Until the admin 'ban' me I'll stick around and do as my daughter said to me, 'Before you say something, say it three times silently to yourself and see if it hurts someone or makes sense to you'.
 
GeorgiaXplant said:
Why do people leaving a forum find it necessary to make an announcement along with a laundry list of everything that they perceive to be *wrong* with it? If they feel compelled to make the announcement that they're leaving, why not just say they're leaving because it's not a good fit...or simply delete their account?

A list of stuff that a member takes issue with? In other words, all the rest of us are fools to *put up with* that member's assessment of our *failings*. And don't bother to reply because he's not going to read replies? I'll bet money that he has read them and will continue to read them.

Every forum isn't right for every person. I looked for a long time before finding this one where I feel comfortable and welcome. And yanno what? It's insulting for Athos or anybody else to question our good taste.

Here's your hat, Athos; there's the door. So there.
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As we Aussies say "Don't let the door hit your bum on the way out....it'll leave a bruise".
 
I do find it sad when anyone feels like they cannot add to a conversation, meeting, or even an internet discussion board. Yet, each of us is a unique personality... some more able to accept criticism than others. Some enjoy a little "mud wrestling". Others live in fear they will not be accepted by one group or another.
If the OP feels he/she needs to move on, it's probably better that happen than see him/her wrest with angst about how the next post will be taken. Life's too short.
I've existed in a career for over 40 years that can see daily negativity. I've grown a quite thick skin. Son-in-law says he doesn't understand how I can keep working "because no one likes you"!!! My job is not to be liked, it's to deliver a quality product to an owner regardless of... in spite of... the attitude/ability of those doing the work. Hence, when someone on a discussion board disagrees with me I do not take it personally. Others do. If minor disagreements have a negative emotional impact, there are few on line discussion boards that will always be "warm and comfortable".
As far as Senior Forums... For a bunch of old-timers, you guys rock!!!!
 
Ameriscot said:
Problem was, nobody really knew who he was!
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What you say there has got me wondering Ameriscot.

Does anybody around here know who I am I ask myself ?
in-disbelief-smiley-emoticon.gif



However, unless I am banned (and I already feel like I am walking on thin ice)
afraid.gif
then I am staying.
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Good luck to Athos though, as it really is a shame when a person feels the need to do a post like that.
 
"Why do people leaving a forum find it necessary to make an announcement along with a laundry list of everything that they perceive to be *wrong* "

I have left a few in the past, invariably because of failures on the part of the mod(s), not the hastiness of the members .

I also invariably say cheerio to the friends I have made and tell them why I'm dropping out of sight
 
Grumpy Ol' Man said:
Hence, when someone on a discussion board disagrees with me I do not take it personally. Others do. If minor disagreements have a negative emotional impact, there are few on line discussion boards that will always be "warm and comfortable".
As far as Senior Forums... For a bunch of old-timers, you guys rock!!!!
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I have to agree with Grumpy here. I don't take disagreement as a personal attack. How could I since my reason for being on a forum is that I like to argue. In starting an argument I do try to remember that behind every avatar is a real person with real feelings and I try to be respectful of this fact. Sometimes I forget and get a bit carried away. When that happens it is appropriate to apologise, just as we would do in a face to face conversation.

There are some people who are uncomfortable with people arguing something out and who think that a fight is breaking out. These people would be better advised to stick to the bland topics until they are more confident to enter the scrum.

I would endorse Grumpy when he says you guys rock. You make my day, every day.
 
Debate is one thing. Arguing is another. I’m pretty good at detecting when someone just wants to bicker back and forth - online and IRL.

I'm not afraid of an argument, but senseless arguing is a waste of time…whether it be reading ir engaging in it. I’m protective of my time. Arguing just for the sake of arguing is foolish, imo.
 
AC, this is the sense that I was using the word 'argue'

argue ˈɑːɡjuː/ verb

verb: argue; 3rd person present: argues; past tense: argued; past participle: argued; gerund or present participle: arguing

1. give reasons or cite evidence in support of an idea, action, or theory, typically with the aim of persuading others to share one's view.
"sociologists argue that inequalities in industrial societies are being reduced"

The other sense I am not so keen on although it doesn't distress me too much. If things get too heated I just leave the room.

2.
exchange or express diverging or opposite views, typically in a heated or angry way.
"the two men started arguing in a local pub"
 
Warri, yes, I think maybe we interpret the term differently. Admittedly, I usually (....usually, not always) attach a negative connotation to the term "argue".

FWIW, IRL when an argument reaches the ridiculous point, a certain stare (with or without raised eyebrow) is effective.

But I have a detestation of people going on and on, beating a subject to death pointlessly, just to hear themselves talk or see their words on a screen.
 
boozercruiser said:
What you say there has got me wondering Ameriscot.

Does anybody around here know who I am I ask myself ?
in-disbelief-smiley-emoticon.gif



However, unless I am banned (and I already feel like I am walking on thin ice)
afraid.gif
then I am staying.
teasing-smiley-sticking-tongue-out-emoticon.gif



Good luck to Athos though, as it really is a shame when a person feels the need to do a post like that.
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Not to worry. We know who you are. :grin:
 
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