I feel worn and it is difficult to compartmentalise

[Shalimar]

I don’t do well if I mourn by keening in a corner, too much grief will cue my PTSD big time. So I try to live as normal a life as possible under the circumstances. Currently I am under contract with another organization to do some profiling work. I thought it was only until the end of September, but my boss says they are pleased with my

progress and would like to extend things for two more months. Sigh. Normally I am adept at compartmentalising things, but my emotions keep leaking through my defences. The fact that there are minors involved only makes it

worse. Looking into the abyss always carries the risk that evil will return your gaze. I am employing all the self care mechanisms at my disposal, I hope it will be enough. It is simply not in me to walk away from anything involving the welfare of children. I feel so inadequate. So afraid I will fail them. Thank you so much for allowing me to vent.

 

[Judycat]

Whoa that is difficult. May a strong hedge encompass you.

 

[Shalimar]

Thank you so much for your kind words Judycat.

 

[terry123]

May the force be with you, Shalimar!!

 

[Shalimar]

Thank you Terry, I need it!

 

[jaminhealth]

Shalimar, I'm betting 1000% that the HGH homeopathic gel I'm using would do you a world of good. But the company is not shipping out of the U.S. yet. j

 

[Warrigal]

Shali dear, if you need to wrap up your contract, then do it. Better you do it before you have a melt down than after. What is the benefit to the children if you break yourself and still have to terminate the contract?

If you can give yourself permission to walk away should you need to, then perversely you might just become strong enough to see it out.

Know that we see in you qualities that we have come to love, and use this knowledge to heal yourself. You have many admirers who are willing you inner peace and strength of mind. Take a moment to drink in our love. It is all we have to give you but it is no small thing.

 

[Shalimar]

Warri, I am touched, I shall ponder your words until I find an answer. Bless you for your love and clarity of mind.

 

[Shalimar]

Thanks Jamin, please let me know when the company ships to Canada.

 

[HazyDavey]

When very sad or bad things are happening, there are people counting on you, and all you feel is overwhelmed. Sometimes out of nowhere there comes an inner strength that gives you clarity and purpose, to help get you through.
This I hope will help. Take Care and hope you Feel Better.

 

[Lc jones]

I was a counselor for many years and was forced to retire due to burn out. If you’re the empathetic, sensitive type of person after period of time you can no longer continue to bombard yourself with tragic circumstances involving many people on a daily basis as you do more than just express empathy you actually internalize others suffering which can lead to severe depression. I’m now retired and I have been working on getting my peace of mind back and I’m doing much better. I can still empathize with others but yet maintain some control over the amount of exposure I have to suffering and tragedy.

 

[Shalimar]

When very sad or bad things are happening, there are people counting on you, and all you feel is overwhelmed. Sometimes out of nowhere there comes an inner strength that gives you clarity and purpose, to help get you through.
This I hope will help. Take Care and hope you Feel Better.

Thanks HazyDavey. Appreciate your concern.

 

[Shalimar]

I was a counselor for many years and was forced to retire due to burn out. If you’re the empathetic, sensitive type of person after period of time you can no longer continue to bombard yourself with tragic circumstances involving many people on a daily basis as you do more than just express empathy you actually internalize others suffering which can lead to severe depression. I’m now retired and I have been working on getting my peace of mind back and I’m doing much better. I can still empathize with others but yet maintain some control over the amount of exposure I have to suffering and tragedy.

Lc, I am pleased you are recovering your peace of mind.

 

[Repondering]

We, none of us, are obligated to finish the task of ministering to the grief in the world but neither may we abandon the mission.
Just keep enough of your personal resources held in reserve, Shalimar, to maintain the momentum of your own journey.

 

[Shalimar]

We, none of us, are obligated to finish the task of ministering to the grief in the world but neither may we abandon the mission.
Just keep enough of your personal resources held in reserve, Shalimar, to maintain the momentum of your own journey.

Wise words, Repondering.Thank you.

 

[Lc jones]

I was a counselor for many years and was forced to retire due to burn out. If you’re the empathetic, sensitive type of person after period of time you can no longer continue to bombard yourself with tragic circumstances involving many people on a daily basis as you do more than just express empathy you actually internalize others suffering which can lead to severe depression. I’m now retired and I have been working on getting my peace of mind back and I’m doing much better. I can still empathize with others but yet maintain some control over theamount of exposure I have to suffering and tragedy.

Lc, I am pleased you are recovering your peace of mind.

Thank you and I hope you do as well!

 

[jujube]

If you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of the world. Shali, it's OK to step away and concentrate on your well-being. Be good to you.

 

[Lc jones]

Wise words, Repondering.Thank you.

But please be sure to take care of yourself first in order to minister to others it’s the only way we really can do it

 

[Lc jones]

But please be sure to take care of yourself first in order to minister to others it’s the only way we really can do it

Edit

 

[SeaBreeze]

Be kind to yourself Shalimar, wishing you brighter times in the near future.

 

[Patio Life]

Sleep as much as you need to, eat well and often, take time to take walks, clean one thing at home.
Take care of yourself, so you have the strength to care for others.

I could not do your job, it would break me in a day.

 

[Shalimar]

Thank you for your kind words, SeaBreeze and Patio Life.

 

[Shalimar]

Thanks Jujube.

 

[StarSong]

So much wisdom has been expressed above, and all better stated than any words I could possibly put together.

Please do take care of yourself, Shali. You are loved and treasured by many.

 

[AnnieA]

I don’t do well if I mourn by keening in a corner, too much grief will cue my PTSD big time. So I try to live as normal a life as possible under the circumstances. Currently I am under contract with another organization to do some profiling work. I thought it was only until the end of September, but my boss says they are pleased with my

progress and would like to extend things for two more months. Sigh. Normally I am adept at compartmentalising things, but my emotions keep leaking through my defences. The fact that there are minors involved only makes it

worse. Looking into the abyss always carries the risk that evil will return your gaze. I am employing all the self care mechanisms at my disposal, I hope it will be enough. It is simply not in me to walk away from anything involving the welfare of children. I feel so inadequate. So afraid I will fail them. Thank you so much for allowing me to vent.

Listen to your leaks. They may be telling you to shore yourself up beyond the timeline you've had in your mind, or they may be telling you to stop. It's so hard to face when you care deeply that you may have to stop.