I Will Not be Posting for a While

jujube said:
I am in favor of putting funerals/memorial services/ celebrations of life off for a little while, especially when the death is "sudden".

It allows family/friends to make arrangements to be there. Everyone is a little less "raw". People can talk and remember and comfort each other.

When my husband died unexpectedly and instantly, we held his memorial service three weeks later. It was at his favorite fish camp. We cried, we talked about what he meant to us, we laughed at funny stories people told about him and we went out in a flotilla of boats to scatter his ashes at his favorite fishing spot.
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It does give you time to gather yourself.
 
My husband died while in Palliative care. He was buried within 5 days. It was only a small funeral service. Six weeks later the Hospice arranged to have a Memorial Service for all those that died in the month of June. I went to it alone as my son couldn't be there because of work commitments. We were asked to put a photo on the altar and light a candle in their honour. It was a very moving service, and we each stood up to announce the name of the person we represented. . When they played The Prayer
that's when we all lost it. Afterwards they served light refreshments and when I went out to the car I looked up at the night sky and said: "Thank you for being my soulmate and giving me our beautiful boys".
 
In Spain you die today..you're buried or cremated tomorrow... it's very, very fast

Eeveryone to their own of course.. but I couldn't cope with burying a loved one so fast.

Can you imagine speaking your last words to them today , and then planting them in the ground tomorrow ?.. that's what the Spanish do.... I wouldnt be able to do that....
 
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There is a time to be born and a time to die. This is clear to me at this time.
We had a good last year putting aside the petty annoyances that made us bicker. Christmas was a great one. We got all the decorations down and planned ahead to make it a joy and not a burden. The family were all there. Gifts were meaningful and it felt very warm.

Since we had Christmas early we decided to go down to Myrtle Beach. The place we met and married. It seemed DH was making it for me. He took me to the places I wanted to go and enjoyed some things he never did. On the last day I insisted we do things he wanted to do and we did. It was a good day.

I was with him when he died. I think he sensed it coming on but it was sudden and I don't think he suffered.
There were strangers that came to our aid immediately and my children rallied and came to my side. Angels.
This gives me peace.
 
hollydolly said:
In Spain you die today..you're buried or cremated tomorrow... it's very, very fast

Eeveryone to their own of course.. but I couldn't cope with burying a loved one so fast.

Can you imagine speaking your last words to them today , and then planting them in the ground tomorrow ?.. that's what the Spanish do.... I wouldnt be able to do that....
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Hollydolly, I think that may be partly a leftover from when the Moors ruled Spain and partly due to the heat. The Moors were muslim and came from very hot countries. So it was tradition that they buried the deceased on the same day.

Although the Moors were driven out of Spain many centuries ago, I suspect that some of their traditions have lingered on, and quick burial is one of them. Combine that with the heat in Spain during the summer and I can fully understand their desire to bury their loved ones quickly.
 
BJintheUK said:
Hollydolly, I think that may be partly a leftover from when the Moors ruled Spain and partly due to the heat. The Moors were muslim and came from very hot countries. So it was tradition that they buried the deceased on the same day.

Although the Moors were driven out of Spain many centuries ago, I suspect that some of their traditions have lingered on, and quick burial is one of them. Combine that with the heat in Spain during the summer and I can fully understand their desire to bury their loved ones quickly.
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Having lived in Spain for many years, and still having a home there..I know all about the Moors & Christians ...maybe something to do with the heat..in some areas.. but I don't really accept that because in Australia or parts of America where its even hotter, burials don't necessarily take place fast because of the heat !
 
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hearlady said:
On Friday, while on vacation in Myrtle Beach, my husband suffered a massive heart attack and passed away.
My three children came, packed me up and got me home.
We are in the middle of arrangements and needless to say it will be a long road.
I'm doing Ok so far and just concentrating on making the best decisions I can to honor him.
He was a good man and he deserves that.
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😕 I'm sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what you are going through......
 
hearlady said:
There is a time to be born and a time to die. This is clear to me at this time.
We had a good last year putting aside the petty annoyances that made us bicker. Christmas was a great one. We got all the decorations down and planned ahead to make it a joy and not a burden. The family were all there. Gifts were meaningful and it felt very warm.

Since we had Christmas early we decided to go down to Myrtle Beach. The place we met and married. It seemed DH was making it for me. He took me to the places I wanted to go and enjoyed some things he never did. On the last day I insisted we do things he wanted to do and we did. It was a good day.

I was with him when he died. I think he sensed it coming on but it was sudden and I don't think he suffered.
There were strangers that came to our aid immediately and my children rallied and came to my side. Angels.
This gives me peace.
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Thank you for sharing all of this.
It is precious.
❣️
 
hearlady said:
On Friday, while on vacation in Myrtle Beach, my husband suffered a massive heart attack and passed away.
My three children came, packed me up and got me home.
We are in the middle of arrangements and needless to say it will be a long road.
I'm doing Ok so far and just concentrating on making the best decisions I can to honor him.
He was a good man and he deserves that.
Click to expand...
I am so very sorry for your loss.
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